The Adventures of Me!

OMG!

2011-09-05T18:14:00.002-06:00

What a summer! Things have been busy to say the least. Which seems to be the story of my life. I spent the last week cleaning my house so that a shwack of family could come stay here for Paula and LJ's wedding. It went great. Everyone fit in my house, including extras, everyone had a great time at the wedding, Paula looked amazing! It was just perfect!

Which leaves me exhausted! Yep, tired again, what a surprise. Hailey's started school, can't believe it. So proud of her, she goes for day 2 tomorrow. She loves it already. Means I have to come up with some sort of routine. Jeepers! Have to get her ready before she goes to bed, make sure she's clean and brushes her teeth every morning, have to get into exercising because I need it, have to do lots of things! lol! my work is never done.

I just figured out that I have only 3 months left to finish my school work, and I have more then 3 months worth of weeks according to Athabasca's little guidlines, so I'm a little panicked all the sudden. See if I can't get a lot of spanish done this week to try to catch up a bit, or else I'll just be working my arse off while I'm in school. What else is new. That starts next tuesday, my second year and I'm still nervous about the first day. 3 profs have already put their courses on Blackboard, 2 with course outlines, have to wait for the reading schedule's, they all sound intense so far. Not so excited about that. I was waiting for 5 classes, but I guess, one is spanish so it's not going to make it onto blackboard is it? lol!

It was a fun summer, I'm sad it's gone, it was really busy though, and now into the busy busy winter. Netflix has lots of new good movies on so I think we may actually hibernate this year. Might be nice! We'll see how long that lasts, have 2 more weekends at the cabin and then a trip to bonnyville in October. Might start planning Halloween early this year so I'm not so pressured at the end. We'll see..
gotta run... lots to do... mostly relaxing today, but have to make supper right now then bath the girlies, get hailey's snack and bag ready for school and then put them to bed. Then maybe visit with jason for a bit. Seems like forever since we just got to be with eachother.

Nite!

No Plan at all...

2011-04-30T22:46:00.002-06:00

I feel as though I need a plan, and yet I have no plan, and I have no idea where to start to get a plan...

I wish that I could just make everything work out, but I'm not even sure where to start to do that either... Once again, I'm tired with the 'shape' I'm in, or lack there of, and my fitness level. I know that when I exercise I feel better, and look better, and yet, I didn't this week. In my defence I did help 3 different people move. Varying levels of effort were needed, but still.. It counts... But I didn't go outside every day like I said we would, we didn't make it to the zoo, and I didn't go for 1 single run or work out dvd exercise.... just didn't. I guess I just needed some actual time off, as much as I could call it that... lol!

I want to make a budget and actually make it work. And I want to start exercising every day, and actually eating better.. I just think that would be great! I want to feel better, have more energy, and be at my goal weight before my 30th birthday, which is in 7 months! Yikes! Didn't know it was coming that quickly!

Either way, I would like that.. I would like to be able to look in the mirror and think something other than 'Eww'! That would be great! I think I got some relaxing done this past week, now I'm going to try to find a balance between relaxing and exercise and working... try to get my house where I'd like it, clean, organized, purged and easier to maintain... as well, get myself in the habit of being active... provide a good example for my children... I think that would be helpful when they are older.

maybe all of this would help organize my thoughts, and allow me to think about them less and actually relax every once in a while.. that would be sublime!

I am going to try to do this. No I AM going to do this. I CAN! No more procrastinating! I can make this work!

Help Jason with his work, make us some more money, work on my Avon a little more, work on the house, and work on me! (and study spanish so I know some when I go back in September! lol!

I can make this work! I will.. so far I haven't lost my mind, so I can do it now..

ok.. sounds good..
on a positive note, I got an A- on my english essay, my prof said A's are very difficult to achieve for a first year student, but I did it! YAY! Even if it had a minus behind it! I'll take it. I just wish the profs would put the marks in the system already! It's killing me while I wait to find out how I did.. I think I got a B- in spanish, but I'm not sure about the rest...

ok.. for now, I'm going to go read for a little while and then go to sleep.. because I can... it was a great night tonight, watched a movie with the girlies that went past their bed time, they were both so excited! and they both were sleeping before it ended. Too cute! Love them!

Lost my phone, which actually worked out ok, we needed a night off.. it was really good actually.. now I'm going to go relax some more and start with my non-plans tomorrow!

Nite!

Just don't cry!

2011-04-11T09:46:00.003-06:00

It won't help anything anyway. Feeling extremely overwhelmed today. I have to read a book for science so I can start studying it for a quiz on thursday that's worth 25% of my final mark. I have to finish an essay that I've been working on for weeks and I'm barely on page 4 of 5-7. I have to study spanish and memorize a whole frack load of vocab for a test on thursday. And then study more spanish so I can pass my oral test next tuesday. I have to look at my shakespeare because I have a final in that, my mom's birthday is this weekend, so I need to go with my dad to buy her a present, then I have to drop off avon, call avon customers arrange to get them their stuff, take books to others so they can order, and put the orders in that I have for this campaign so I can maybe make some money. I have to clean my house for mom and dad's anniversary party next weekend, and figure out the menu and put it all together. I have to get my taxes done saturday so my accountant can file them. Not even sure if I'm doing everything correctly. I'm so overwhelmed all I want to do is sit on the floor and cry my eyes out! I keep thinking if I could just live two more weeks I'll be fine, but it seems like it's not going to end there. The week after classes helping 2 probably 3 people move, which I am happy to do because they've all helped me but I didn't think they'd all move in the same day!

kinda just want to go for a run because it looks really beautiful outside and then spend the day on the couch watching movies with the girlies. Let my brain recoup and then try to come up with some sort of game plan. Unfortunately I have to go type up my essay and get going on everything else!

ok.. here I go.. wish me luck!

More writing/typing...

2011-04-09T11:27:00.002-06:00

Goodness gracious there are only 2 days of school left and then two days of tests (ok, a half hour on tuesday and three hours on thursday (in another week though, not this coming week) and then I'm officially done my first year of university! I can't believe it! I totally survived. Full course load, two kids, dog, husband, working for Avon, and all the other little 'blips' life threw at us! I made it!! I can't believe it. This may be premature as I sit here in my bed attempting to revise one essay and come up with from scratch my other essay.. yuck... the second one is the bane of my existence right now. i have nothing for it.. the shakespeare one went not so bad.. I'm hoping after lunch I look at this other one and something will just click and I'll start typing and it will all work out beautifully. Then I have 4 days to fix it and perfect it and hand it in and get a... B... yep seems to be my average in this class, apparently it's very difficult to get an A and I'm ok with a B, gives me a pretty good GPA and everyone keeps telling me my GPA is really good for first year.. so I'm going to run with it! So next weekend I have to do my taxes as well as learn spanish and study Shakespeare, then do my tests, then plan and host mom's anniversary party. After that, start training for my 10km marathon (of which I have to find one and sign up for it), start the spring cleaning of my disgusting house, and help Danny and Carol move! No problem! I can totally do all this!

What else? hm... I'm sure there was more, oh, help Paula figure out and make wedding invitations, find bridesmaid dresses, plan her bridal shower, plan and follow through with all the really great things I'm going to do this summer, and lose a shwack load of weight! No Problem! I'm actually excited. I will have so much freedom it will be great!

Ok.. meaning I have to finish these essays so I can live a little this weekend. Who am I joking, if I finished these essays I'd just have to spend the rest of my time studying spanish! lol!

ok.. talk to you all later,
me

Reading and Writing

2011-03-27T18:55:00.003-06:00

I love reading blog posts. I love hearing about what's happening to other people, living vicariously through their stories, seeing the pictures, all of it! I don't even care if I'm a geek for writing a blog, (this reference would make more sense if you were all in my Science, Technology and Society class at university) I just think it's all great! What a great way to know what's going on in someone else's life, or to learn from their experiences, or learn something new!

I wish that I had more to report that was somewhat exciting. The jist of my life right now is reading, writing, more reading, more writing, add in a little Avon and a little socializing, and a very little amount of house work, and that's about it!

I have plans for the summer though, let me tell you! I'm done classes in 3 weeks. That's right! Three weeks of actual classes, one mid term the night of the 21st and then that's it until september! YAY! Can't wait! I'm hoping to train for a 10 km marathon, we're heading to Ontario for a week in July, Paula's wedding september long weekend, add in there a few 30th birthdays, and a whole lotta time at the cabin and hopefully some camping and you have yourself one heck of a summer!

I can't wait! I'm already planning how every day the girls and I can do something outside, go for a walk, go to the park, go to the fountain park, bike rides, runs, roller blading, new paths all over the city, trips to the zoo, trips to heritage park, trips to fish creek.. all of it! Can't wait! So excited!! Just wish it was summer already.. the snow and grey-ness outside don't really instil a lot of confidence in me right now. I'm hoping to get down to my goal weight before Paula's wedding and be smoking hot! Then I just have to maintain that weight for the rest of my life, which I think I could totally do if I ever got down there, because the effort it's taking to get there is too much to do more then once... hoping to put the girls in swimming lessons (whoops, better get on that one sooner then later, because I'm sure I'm already supposed to have signed them up for that.. ) what else? I just can't even think strait I'm so anxious. Even though the snow won't be gone in three weeks I think it will be heaven.. can't wait to just hang out with my girlies with out the pressure of school looming over my head. Don't get me wrong, I've thoroughly enjoyed (most) every minute of it, but I just can't wait for there to be no deadlines, no reading and no papers due for a few months. I think I've decided I'm going to hold on to my major in english, but I'm going to minor in communications hopefully, and still get 4-6 classes in spanish. We'll see...

Alas, I sit here typing this no problem, the words are just flowing and to me so far it sounds not so bad, and my evil shakespeare essay is shadowing any enjoyment I can get from writing this post.. only 1000 words (which now in my second semester doesn't seem so bad) and yet, I'm stumped. Mostly because I'm editing as I go, and I write a bunch, delete other bunches, then write more then delete more, it's a never ending cycle and I just wish it would all flow nicely and be done so that I could start reading.. which I have a crap load to do!

Ok Joie, this is your pep talk!
You only have 1/2 of a shakespeare essay to write and then no more Shakespeare essays again unless you're foolish enough to sign up for another shakespeare class.
You have to research and write your science paper, but that's only 2 pages, that's only 500 words, that's nothing! You can do that!
You have to read the books for English 203 so you can write the essay, but you have over a week to do that, and that's only the first draft of the essay that's due, you have time to fix that too!
Your general studies essay is written, and it's pretty good already, so add the ideas that you've already been tossing around and you'll be done, maybe 3 hours tops!
STUDY FOR SPANISH! You can do this! You will get more then 70 on your written composition. You can do this! You know what you're talking about, just study the vocabulary and you can do this!
Other then that, you have some more reading for 203 to do, more reading for STAS to do, reading for General studies (only a little). It sounds like a whole lot, but you can do it, (mostly because you have to!) and you will live, and in 3 weeks you can celebrate!!! WOO HOO!!!

Bring on the break!

Back to writing, this work isn't going to do itself!

chau mis amigos!

What Am I Doing?

2011-03-06T21:59:00.002-07:00

In theory, most things sound like a good idea at some point. When faced with the reality of some ideas, they don't always seem like the best choice. In the light, sometimes things look uglier then when you had just imagined them. When is enough enough? When is it too much? How can you tell how far you can go unless you push yourself further and further all the time? How do you know you've pushed you're self too far, spread yourself too thin, and how you do you decide what to give up to make it all balance again? School is crazy busy, as per usual, procrastination on my part seems to make it busier. Or at least feel that way. Kacie's been sick for the last 6 days, which makes things that much more complicated, spending whole days in the waiting room at the urgent care or at the children's hospital doesn't exactly fit into my time management plan. Then all she wants to do is snuggle, and be held and lay there while watching tv or what ever happens to be on, and how can I say no? But how do you motivate yourself to get up and get going when she's napping or gone to bed and she's in her crib and sleeping and no reason to hold you down for the time being?

I just don't know the answers. Laundry's piling up, house is getting messier and more disorganized by the minute, school work is piling up, so much bloody reading to do I can't stay on top of it and I feel like I'm near drowning, just trying to keep my head above the water for seconds at a time, enough to survive.

So many things going on, so many things to think about, to worry about, to take care of. Jason says he has no motivation, well I'm not sure what else I can do to motivate him, I've tried, add that to the list of things to do please. I can't even seem to motivate myself, I really feel like I do nothing, but at the same time feel like I never stop! I'm my own conundrum (that was really hard for me to spell, what a funny word!)

Any words of advice? Any way to get it all done? Any way to get my cake and eat it too?

Well, after 10, still essays to revise, different one's to start, research to be done, books to read, shakespeare to read, and studying to do... nothing serious! That's only the school work, doesn't include any of the house work I'd like to do because I know he won't and it really needs to get done, as well as my avon.. seriously! so much to do and so much to think about, think my head may explode!!! I don't want to! That's what I have to say about that!

better go read, and then get some sleep, a day at home with the girlies to myself is always harder to actually accomplish things then when I have that little bit of help he does offer some of the time..

nite!

me

How come?

2011-02-27T18:29:00.002-07:00

When I'm just writing for fun the words flow so easily. When I'm writing for school I struggle with every single word. Never mind sentences and structure and the likes, but every word seems to pose an issue for me! I lose my mind. I don't know what I'm talking about, I can't make the flow work, I can't do anything! And now it's affecting my blogging.. even this seems challenging! WTH? (if only you could use things like WTH and OMG and LOL in essays for university! hahah totally joking that would be even more depressing) I just want the words to flow, I've been in this room most of the day and I'm not even done the first paragraph and the problem is I don't have anything to put into the following paragraphs so I'm not sure where to go or how to get there!

I'm so sick of my office for the day, there is so much more school work to do.. I'm wondering if I can get a light outside so I could read my book in the hot tub... hmm.. might not be a terrible idea.. first I have to get at least 700 words in a first draft spit out for this dumb essay.. I will not go to bed until I have something to work with tomorrow.. so I'm not writing the whole thing tomorrow..!! Yikes!!! ok.. enough typing for fun.. better type for marks now..

ugh!

me

Mid-term blues

2011-02-13T14:32:00.003-07:00

It's that time of the semester again, and I'm feeling bluer then I did last 'mid-term'. Last semester was all 'read this text, memorize everything in it and then spew it out for the test'. This semester is all 'read this novel, or watch this video and then do a close reading, tell us what the author really means, analyze it and tell us your thoughts on it and use the text to prove it.' I'm baffled. I don't think I have an original thought in my head. It's like if the prof doesn't tell me at some point what to think then I have no thoughts. I can do the research and see what others say, but when putting it all together, I form no thoughts of my own...

I'm stumped, and frustrated, and tired.... can't wait for reading week.. although I have a lot of work to do then as well.. so not sure what good it will do me.. this semester is just really hard, and I've been locked in my office for 3 days now, and I feel like I have nothing to show for it. I researched my science project, but haven't actually completed the write up. I put it together, but it sounds like crap, and I'm just starting research for my annotated bibliography, actually i've been trying to find something for over a week, but unsuccessfully) and now I have to have it done for tuesday and I'm freaking out! then I have to memorize a chapter in spanish before thursday... because we have a test! shit! thought that was after reading week, it was supposed to be after reading week, now it's before and I guess it doesn't matter, because the prof isn't changing it so I just have to suck it up and pray I pass!

Didn't do so well on the last test, only 68%. Brutal.. what am I doing? I shouldn't be in school... I'm not smart enough for this! The 18 year olds all around me are so smart, the know so much, they took spanish is high school and they're practically pros, and then they are just plain smart in all the other subjects, things appear to come so easily to them.. yeesh! I just don't get it.. I do the reading, and participate in class, why is this such a challenge? I am starting to hate reading and writing.. it's too hard!

ok.. done whining,.. have to go finish my bibliography or else I'm in total shit tomorrow when I have to do all that reading and my bibliography...

ciao,
me

New Year, same thoughts

2011-01-03T12:32:00.001-07:00

Yep, Still want to be more organized, take care of things as they come up instead of waiting for them to pile up and then overwhelm me. Want to work out more, eat better, spend more quality time with my children. Do good in school, spend more quality time with Jay, do fun stuff, and win the lottery! Nothing serious.. not resolutions, just desires, they're always there, so they can't really be called new, same one's just a new year to do them in.. The holidays have been amazing! I've done NOTHING! it's been great. I really needed that. But now everyone else is back to work and I keep figuring I better do something too... need to get my weight under control again, I've been lazy and eating anything in sight, so really need to smarten up, I know better.. and I don't even enjoy this any more.. it's funny... I'll catch on at some point that eating healthy and exercise actually makes me feel better.. some day.. probably the same day I figure out how easy it is to just enter my avon tax information when it comes in every campaign instead of holding onto it and doing it all at once.. 19 different campaigns to sort through and enter for the 2010 tax year, I have to have them done before school starts, can't do both at the same time.

so yeah, less talking more action.. maybe that is my ongoing resolution...

speaking of which, I better feed the kids so I can get some taxes taken care of so I don't have to worry about it all week..

ciao,
me

The Wall

2010-12-19T18:27:00.003-07:00

These guys are why I'm doing this.. I just have to keep reminding myself that.. I want my girls to know that you can do ANYTHING you want.. as long as you are willing to put forth the effort.. and that you can succeed at everything, (have your cake and eat it too, although I never did understand that saying) as long as you're willing to work! and make some sacrifices along the way... but if you think in the end it's worth it, the go for it no matter how crazy everyone else thinks you are, and never, never say you can't because you think it will be hard.. everything that's worth it is hard.. at least that's how it seems..

No this isn't about a Pink Floyd song. I don't know it well enough to write a post about that, and since I don't do drugs, not stoned enough to make any sense out of it if I did know it better... but that's all my thoughts on Pink Floyd for the time being...

I knew that I couldn't keep up the breakneck pace I had set out for myself. School, Avon, Studying, time enjoying my girls, studying, time taking care of my girls, studying, trying to not totally neglect my house, spending time with my friends, studying... seeing my family, trying to make money at Avon, studying, trying to live a normal life and not lose my mind because all I do is study... Despite knowing I couldn't keep it up forever.. I was hoping I'd at least make it until after finals this first semester. Then after recuperating (who knew recuperating didn't have an o in it.. swore that it did.. oh well) over the christmas break, I could do it all over again until after the winter semester finals. It was an excellent plan if I do say so myself.. just had to hold on, cross my fingers and ignore that annoying feeling in the back of my mind that I was completely insane and getting crazier by the minute...

Well I'm not crazier... but I am done.. I just don't want to any more.. I just need a break.. I'm exhausted.. it's been a lot of work! I miss my girlies, I miss my husband. I wish I could take time to relax with out thinking about all the school work I have to do, and studying that needs to be done so that my grades are good... or how dirty my house is and how much that annoys me.. yep.. a clean freak at heart folks, who woulda thunk it? If you met me as a child, you would have never guessed it.. my room was always a disaster... but now... even though you can't tell when you look at my house, I'm a neat freak.. I love my house when it's clean and organized.. can't stand it when it's not.. so when it's not and I don't have time to remedy that, it sets me on edge...

Someday, when I'm a teacher, I'm hiring a maid to come by a couple times a week and make sure the place stays clean.. that would be so nice!!!

That's what I really want for christmas, a clean organized house! I'd be in heaven!

Great, now it's 6:30 and I'm not studying.. I watched 1 1/3 episodes of Buffy, first just a bit for a break, then a whole episode because I had to eat supper, then I just didn't feel like studying again so I kept watching.. now it's later and I'm writing a blog instead of studying.. the problem with Astronomy, is I don't know any of the information even a little bit, the lectures bored me and the assignments were out of the text book, so you didn't have to engage the brain too much to get a good mark.. I did ok on the mid term but it only covered half the material required for the final.. there are tutorials online and I could finish taking notes out of the book like I've been working on for 2 days.. the website through the text book also has flash cards to help.. A guy in my comp sci class said he used all those things and got an easy A, I'm hoping for a C in this class.. it's gonna be tough! maybe a C+ but not any higher then that, this mark is 45% of our total mark.. so if I get 60& I'm still going to have 71% overall.. meaning... B-... as far as I can tell I got a B in spanish, and a B+ in religious studies.. (got a 76% on that test I was worried about last thursday!! YAY! and 98% on my first term paper!! YAY!!!... so yeah.. B-.. that's ok.. that means I'd be sitting at a B average which is what I was shooting for anyway.. A would have been nice, but seriously... wasn't going to happen.. depending on how Comp Sci and Coms goes though, I might get a B+.. a B+ average is 80-84.. that's pretty impressive to me.. so I'll be ok with a B+... they sure do make A's hard to get! an average of 90% or higher? Who can pull that off? not anyone who has anything else to do with there time that's for sure!!

ok.. back to studying.. now it's 7.. and maybe I'll quit a little early tonight so I can do something besides sit in front of my computer..

ciao,
me

oh my goodness!

2010-12-06T09:12:00.002-07:00

I can not believe all the things I have to get done. And I'm hoping that my supper efficiency mode kicks in at some point so that it all gets done. The to do list is a trillion miles long, everything has to be done RIGHT NOW and I just want to crawl back into my bed and hide! Seriously, who's idea was it to go back to school? That was a really dumb idea, and to take full time classes? Even dumber idea... most people take one or two courses, take 20 years to get their degree, no big deal, me, I'm going to do it in 6 years, that was the plan.. notice I said WAS.. yep already changed that.. going to only take 4 classes next semester because I can't do it. I just can't, I need to have more time to get things done, and less to do so I don't lose my mind. I feel like I'm missing out on so much right now because every night I just work on school work, and every day, school work, I spend a lot of time locked in my office all by myself. I want to do all the fun things of the holidays.. I know this is very whiney.. sorry.. new prescription for my b/c and so my hormones are not what they're supposed to be, then my poor Frost the Bunny died on saturday.. he was sick and I had to take him to get him put down. Jason buried him yesterday. It's very sad, had him for 11 years, the vet said an old rabbit was 8 years old.. Guess we showed them wrong... so yeah, he's gone, I was supposed to work on my paper all weekend and I didn't get the time, so I only worked on it yesterday, and I wasn't smart and didn't start working on it when he assigned it, I waited until this weekend to start my research and start writing it, so I had to ask for an extension, which makes me feel like a retard, I had a month's notice, couldn't find the time? Loser! My weight is not sure what to do. I'm eating like shit, it's just one thing after another, on the up side, I've discovered I can run for 30 minutes with out stopping.. pretty impressed with that.. done it about 4 times now..

I really want to just spill more of my guts on here, but the baby is still in her bed and I can hear her calling, so I need to get her some breakfast and I need to get working on my paper, and my spanish, and studying for everything.. I'm supposed to go over the review questions for computer science before class tomorrow so that when he goes over them I have an idea of what he's talking about, but I haven't read the last two chapters, so I have some catching up to do there too.. when did it all get away from me? I'm in so much trouble, and I really wanted christmas baking with out having to do all the work so I said I'd take part in a holiday cookie exchange.. so I have to bake 10 dozen cookies before wednesday night so I can drop them off... Yoy!! what was I thinking? At this point, I'm pretty sure all thinking is limited strictly to school thoughts..

ok.. off and running.. all I have to do today is Finish chapter 5 exercises for spanish and memorize all the vocab for the end of chapter 4 and all of chapter 5 for the test on thursday which includes entering all the terms and translations into excel and importing them into my flash card program on my ipod. Find 4 more sources for my coms paper and then write 1500-2000 words (8 pages double spaced) and edit it and do the bibliography. Read all computer science and do practice questions. Practice Alice for computer science for my quiz thursday. Read Rels to page 211 and make notes on Jainism and Buddhism and study. Read the rest of Chapter 9 and all of Chapter 10 in astro, then do all the tutorials for chapter 1,2,3,S1, 7,8,9,&10 and review the flash cards online. Finish 4 readings for coms, make notes of all, and study. Call/email all my avon customers so I can arrange to drop off their orders, and put stickers on the rest of the books and enter the orders I already do have, and fix the rest of the invoices so that I can get paid. Stop at the bank and deposit my avon money so I can pay my bill tomorrow. Do laundry, give the girls baths, get them packed for mom's house tonight, find all hailey's dance clothes, find my cheque book so I can pay for her dance stuff, figure out where the pizza's we ordered are so I can pick them up. Buy christmas cards so I can fill them out and send then out. Make some ribbon christmas trees I really want to make and that I bought all the stuff for, and go to fabric land so I can buy all the stuff to make aprons for the girls for christmas, finish my christmas shopping, and finish crocheting a scarf for Hailey and make one for Kacie. No problem.. I can do all that!

before thursday!
no prob..
gonna go hide in my bed now..

me

Waiting

2010-10-12T15:23:00.002-06:00

It doesn't happen very often, but I have time to kill so I might as well blog... I have 6 minutes till class starts... lol!

School = crazy busy! Not joking, if I'm not here at the university then I'm on the bus reading text books or I'm at home reading textbooks and working on projects. I never thought I would think about school so much.. lol again! who am I kidding, me, I think about everything all the time.. but on that note, I've gotten better about that, my brain is compartmentalizing now and so when I'm at school I think about school and when I'm home, well I still think about school, but less, depending on what I'm doing... it's pretty handy actually.. except today.. when my mom send me a bbm saying that I need to find someone to watch the girlies next tuesday because she's leaving tomorrow for van! Seriously? At first I was really upset and angry because that's not enough notice.. I am in classes so I can't even see today if I can find someone to watch the kids, why can't they be like normal human beings and make plans for a week from now?? What is up with that??? I know I'm not paying hence the reason she'll never hear my rant, but this is like a job. An obligation that she has made to me stating that every tuesday she will watch my girls. So to message me at lunch tuesday and say we're leaving tomorrow and won't be back before next tuesday is a huge pain in the ass! And my back up person is in mexico till saturday so i can't even ask her! Grr!!! It's going to cost me probably $100 just to find someone to watch the girls for 1 day! OMG! I've calmed down a bit (well I was before I started writing this blog) and I know, I'm not paying, she's giving me a week to find someone, so that should be plenty of notice. But she says, we're leaving tomorrow, I have not chance to attempt to put something into play and I have no choice! angers me..

well my time is up. . have to pay attention to my astronomy lecture now.. ciao, me

Adventures

2010-10-04T14:17:00.003-06:00

I know they come in all shapes and sizes and times and all that fun stuff, but sometimes, i'm just jealous! Friends of ours are in Dubi, starting a new life, trying all sorts of new things, it sounds magical almost!

I'm starting my adventure, and I'm sure like everyone else I am a ball of emotions. Anxious, nervous, worried I made the wrong choice, 6 years is a long time. This is a lot of work! Studying, missing out on beautiful days outside with my girlies so I can hopefully not bomb the test on thursday that is worth 20% of my mark, waking up sunday and locking myself in the basement with my notes instead of sitting on the couch for even part of the day with the family watching cartoons or cheesy movies... got me a little bumbed and wondering if I'm doing the right thing. Jason's been amazing, constantly reassuring me, and telling me that in the long run this is the better idea, and just reminding me of all the reasons I'm doing this... I still have my doubts, but he seems pretty sure, and he's doing everything he can to make school a little easier for me. I've never seen him do so much housework in my life, but the house looks amazing and I don't have to worry about it. I like it! I'm hoping that I do well in my classes, there's just so much to remember, I'm not sure I can remember it all... I really want to be successful, not just skim by. We'll see... two tests this week, already have done stuff for marks in the other two classes and the third has an assignment due in a couple weeks so hopefully it will do well as well.. have to research that this week.. hopefully I can find a balance between home, family, school, and me... and then I won't feel so out of the loop... it just seems like if I'm doing one thing I'm not thinking about the others at all.. which is great and then bad in the same breath...

well ok.. haven't gotten the baby up from her nap yet and heard her start talking about an hour ago.. better go get her some lunch before it's supper time....

I'll be back, hopefully with more to talk about, more adventures of my own... just not sure I have them.. seems my life has a pretty narrow scope right now... and I just need to lean back (haven't got time for the whole step) and take a look, make sure it's all going the way I want it to...

ciao for now,
me

Freaking out much!

2010-09-13T12:44:00.002-06:00

Well, tomorrow school starts. I know it's only two days a week, but don't let that fool you. It's still full time university... yep... 5 classes a semester counts as full time.. and I'm taking five classes, just in only two days a week.. I think in my head that this shouldn't be that hard, that I can totally pull this off, but then another part of me is totally freaking out!!!!! What am I thinking? What is it going to be like? What should I expect? Will there be lots of homework? Assignments? Tests? How good am I at studying? Can I write a university paper? There is a writing centre, so going to visit that place! Going to have to! Tomorrow my day isn't a typical day, neither is thursday for that mater. I have a class, 40 minutes to kill, a class, 2 hours to kill, 2 classes, an hour to kill and then another class.. Usually I have two out of three of those breaks but apparently we don't have any tutorials for computer science this week.. I want to go for a run tuesday's at lunch and I want to go swimming thursday's before class, just not sure if I'll actually do that or not! I'm so baffled.. everything sounds like it's going to work out.. that's what my head says.. but again.. that other part is like 'Seriously? Many people can't pull off a couple of evening classes on top of the commitments they already have, you're going to add on top of everything else full time school, and you think you're going to have time to run and swim? Crazy girl.

My weight watchers hasn't been going very well this last couple of weeks, I've stopped really paying attention to what I'm eating.. only a month into the program and I'm falling off the bandwagon.. what the heck? I really want it to work, I'm down almost 10 pounds and I really want to be down more.. gotta get back on that. Gotta do something! Gotta get motivated today. Seriously, I've done nothing, and now I'm sitting on the floor of my office because i can't find a space at my desk to put my computer on, all I wanted to get done for sure today was to get my office cleaned so I could actually work in it, call my customers for avon so they could get their stuff, and get my laundry put away and the upstairs cleaned up a bit because it's a disaster and it's driving me crazy. Now tonight there is a webinare for avon that I would actually like to listen to, and I have to take the girls to mom's house and I have to get myself ready for classes. YIKES! have to be more efficient.. it's almost like today is the last day of my life that I don't HAVE to be more efficient, so I'm totally slacking.. can't do that.. too much to do!

well gonna go waste more time and take another typing test, because Cathy says I should be a fast typer and everyone always comments on how fast I type and when I did a test on friday it said 67 words per minute and Cathy says it should be faster.. she's 77.... so I kinda want to try... and I kinda want to figure things out and get my house cleaned, and run at least 4 km so that I've run 250 km since christmas and I did it before I went back to school which was a goal of mine.. nothing serious.. I can pull all this off.. just have to get a brain transplant with someone really efficient..

ciao for now,
or as my new class will be..
adios!

Need to be more efficient

2010-08-16T14:33:00.002-06:00

So here I am wasting time writing a blog! HAHAHA! Smart!

So many pressures. Money, school starting soon, making sure the girls are having fun; happy; healthy; developing at the right speed; not missing out on anything; getting enough 'mommy time'. Getting the house work done, getting basic up keep done on the house, done myself because I can't afford to hire someone to fix my flower beds or to paint my trim or any of that stuff. Make sure I'm getting time to have fun, and relax and do stuff I want to do, but not enough that I get so used to being lazy that when school starts I can't make anything work at all... just stressed. I still want to be successful with my Avon, but that takes effort and that's an effort I don't seem to be making recently. I just need to figure it all out. I know I come on here and make the same claims and the same complaints all the time. But I still haven't figured it out. I told Jason maybe it would be best if we sat down and figured out some sort of plan for a routine that we could get into before I go back to school so that when I'm in classes we have something to fall back on and we'll be ok. I just thought we had more time and that time is slipping. And I still have so many things I want to do or get done before summer is over. I just don't think they're all going to happen. I really wish I could talk to someone about this, but I just feel that pretty much everyone I know has already heard it and doesn't want to any more.. they just can't help and so are tired of hearing me complain about something I don't seem to be doing anything about. I just don't get it. And again, here I am wasting time. Instead of sorting avon orders and putting stickers on books and calling/emailing customers. Grr.. what's wrong with me. I haven't been efficient all day today, and I'm still sick, this is week 4.. it has to go away eventually.. seriously! Kacie has a dr's appointment for next tuesday, I'm not sure if I should go wait at a medi centre this week and waste all that time, or if I should just wait until her appointment and go get it checked then... hmm.. decisions decisions..

really have to go do something.. I'm going to go do the avon stuff.. maybe get it done, and maybe get some painting done this afternoon... or laundry or something.. I just gotta.. that's all there is to it..

ciao for now,
me

It's a start.

2010-06-21T14:47:00.002-06:00

I don't even know how to start this blog. Normally I just jump right in and the words come to me, but right now I find myself typing something and deleting it over and over.. silly.

Well lets start with the Home business Fair. Not sure if I talked about this on here, but here's a little background info. I wanted to find customers who were close to me so I wanted to go into a show where I could sell some of my products and get some contact information for customers in my area. Originally I was going to talk to 10 people that I knew that also had at home businesses and rent out a room in the Mckenzie towne hall, do a little local advertising, some word of mouth, try to get my current customers to come and voila, we'd have a show. Well the hall wouldn't let me do that. Couldn't rent the space for the purpose of making money. Stupid. What ever, I contacted the Deerfoot inn and casino they said I could do it there. So it increased to a 20 person show. Then I saw the room I was thinking of and decided it was too small, we opted for the bigger room now it was going to be a 30 table show. Well we measured the room, decided it was big enough we could fit more tables, then it was a 37 table show. Somewhere near the beginning Tom offered to help plan and organize. Silly guy. Well the two of us plugged away, hit some pretty crazy potholes, but we made it. It went off beautifully, everyone involved seemed to really love it I was pretty excited. I got some new customers and sold some of my stock! Beautiful!

So that's over, thank goodness because it took a lot of my time thinking and planning and all that jazz. After it was done, I'm looking around the house and I can't believe the state it's in. It's a disaster! Everywhere, there isn't anywhere in the whole house that I would like to just go into and sit and be able to forget about the rest of the mess. So I decide enough is enough! I start cleaning on Thursday I'm determined that this place will not only be cleaned, but purged and organized by the end of the month so I can have a fun summer and do what ever I want, and just enjoy myself! I can't wait! We're done the main floor and the upper floor (mostly) have all the hard parts done, just have to do the dusting, vacuuming, washing kinda of stuff. It looks amazing! The basement and the garage are left, which is fine, not going to lie though, they totally intimidate me. There's a reason they look the way they do, because the stuff that gets put in there is the stuff I don't know what to do with so it gets stuffed somewhere out of sight! Oi, it's going to be crazy. But sometime this week, I'm totally gonna get it done. I'm not putting up with this place any more. We cleaned the office and the play room, and they were pretty bad, the rest can't be that bad. And we've been really great about keeping up on it for the last few days so if we can just do that, then we should be golden when I go back to school! It's a huge weight off my shoulders.

Now I have to focus on my Avon a bit more. Have to get myself back on track. I need to spend some time getting it running smooth again. Get myself caught up, pay some more attention to my customers.. that kinda stuff. I can do this, that's my plan this week. All those things. I can handle it, and clean those other rooms. If I could only get this dumb head cold to go away, it's making my head all groggy!

I ran 3 times last week, that's better then nothing and I plan to run 3 times this week.. should be good... I was supposed to run a 4th time last week, but we went for a bike ride on saturday instead, which was totally worth it.

I guess I should stop talking about getting things done on here and actually do them..

talk to you all later,
me

Not as Planned...

2010-03-20T22:57:00.002-06:00

So, for a long time I've been thinking about how my life wasn't really going as planned...

In theory, when I was in high school I was going to go to university, work in a coffee shop, be a waitress at some point, graduate and do some really great important job, probably as some sort of scientist, tour the world, and live in really great places all over the world. Find the love of my life and spend my days having fun. There was no children in the picture, but I was open to pets.

It was going to be a really exciting, successful life. I was never going to own a house because then you would be tied down, just rent, then you could pack up and go whenever and where ever you wanted.

Tonight, Kacie woke up crying while I was watching TV. Not only my baby, but baby #2. Sleeping in the house that I own with my high school sweetheart. I've never been to University, never been to Europe, or anywhere really, I sell Avon, which I actually like, and I think I'm pretty good at. I would never change any of it. I'm actually going to University, in the fall, so check on thing off the list, I may not be going to exotic places right now, but I am going to new places and trying new things. I hated running before, but I actually like it, in fact, I want to really get much better at it.. we'll see... I think eventually I'd like to triathalon. Actually, I know I want to, I just really want to say I did it. And after university I will have enough time and money to not only tour the world, but do it with my girlies and my Jay by my side, and do it every summer, christmas or spring break. Important job, check and traveling the world, check.

Kacie was upset and snuggling against me, it was, amazing. She is such a mama suck. The way it feels when she reaches towards me when someone else is holding her, or when she is crawling around and she does that little head butt move, where she crawls right into my legs and then sits down and looks up so that I will pick her up. I call it the 'Pick me up mum' move. Love it! And when Hailey hurts herself and then needs me to hold her and make her feel better, or when she wants me to read her a story and she sits on my lap. It's such a good feeling knowing someone needs you and wants you to be there. When they wrap their little arms around you, telling you 'I love you mom'. Or looking at you with their teary eyes expecting you to fix it, to make it better. Sitting near you or on you just because they can and they actually want to. Kacie crawls around and plays and Hailey goes in her play room and reads or plays with her toys but inevitibly the place they want to be the most is in my office playing with my calculator and my lotions, pretending to be me and helping their pretend customers. It's adorable. And I wouldn't trade it. You hear people on TV or in books say things like this, but wow.. sometimes I just sit back completely amazed that I had anything to do with the totally fascinating little people. I just hope that if your reading this and don't know what I'm talking about that you do someday. That you find a little person tugging on your pants while you're trying to do dishes or make supper. It's the best feeling.

And I know I'm insanely busy, but it seems like everyone is. In someway or another and maybe to different degrees, but it seems like relative to their own 'normal' life, everyone's busy. Well my life was busy before and so now, it's just that same relative amount of busier.

I have goals. I want to go on a free trip with Avon, and see the whole entire world at some point. I'm going to be a teacher. I'm hopefully going to teach teenagers something... we'll see.. and I'm going to raise two really great girls, I'm at least going to make a difference in their lives. I'm going to grow old with my best friend, checking out everywhere from Saskatchewan to Japan and everywhere in the middle and all around them with him. Maybe in first class hotels, but more likely in our camper (for the places we can drive to anyway). I'm excited. I like my job, I get to meet new people, be as nosey as I want because I get to put their stuff together, I like it... my girlies get to help me out by sleeping or just not crying while I drive around all over the city.

I'm actually going to do all my goals, and some extras, it's going to be great! I can't wait for more of those moments with my girls, for more adventures with my Jay, and school days of my own and other's. I probably won't ever work in a coffee shop, and I more then likely never be a waitress, at least not one that ever gets paid, but I'm ok with that. I hate retail and I hate shift work.. lol.. so I'll stick with it..

I'll live for sure, things might not have gone according to my plan, but I think in the end I'll still accomplish all the same end results. And I can live with that..

over and out, it's me...

Early morning thoughts

2010-03-10T07:08:00.002-07:00

Don't you hate it when you wake up way before you have to and your mind is racing with a million things and so you just lay there rather then getting that extra sleep while you can? The day hasn't started yet, you have time to get everything you 'have' to get done before you leave the house if you wake up a hour or two later, the kids are still sleeping, but there you are, staring at the ceiling or the wall, or laying there with your eye's closed trying to will yourself back to sleep. All the while thoughts are creeping into your head, 'I need to do this, I need to get that, drop this off, pick this up, talk to this person about this, this is what I should do with that, I should...' not go back to sleep apparently...

That seems to be most mornings with me... I have all these plans all the time for making my life run smoother, and accomplishing more with less effort (at least that's my theory) and so far, I haven't actually. Just have the plans, and they keep getting bigger, more elaborate or simply growing in numbers because I don't finish previous ideas and then come up with more, and then of course the family comes in with their own plans and life happens so more things come up. I just feel like most times instead of taking charge of my life and steering it in the direction I want it to go, I'm barely hanging on to the reins and praying I don't fall off!

How many times have you heard 'if there were just more hours in the day?' and how many times have you thought it? I think it, but then I think, you know what, I'm pretty exhausted by the end of the day, if there were more hours, I would feel obligated to keep going and be even more tired, which would be counter productive I'm sure.

Hey, I got the space avonfromjoie.com you should go check it out. It will come with a new email address, and hopefully I'll stay on top of it with updates. I'm hoping to put pictures up there about events I've taken part in, news articles I've found about avon, maybe link to any commercials I can get my hands on, put some of the specials of the campaign up there, and add my newsletters on there as well... a lot of hopes for this site, hope I can get it to where I want it and find the time to stay on top of it. I'm already late with my 'monthly' newsletter, and my customer service is suffering, and I'm not getting signs out like I'd like, it's difficult. Have to find the money to do the things I want to promote my business, but need my business to grow and make money so I can do those things. I'm very excited about it though, I've made money off of having a 'downline' which is great, I recommend everyone to go into Selling Avon and then sign up for Leadership, it's great, all you have to do is be there for your team and help them when they need it. I hope I'm a good team leader, I'm really trying. I've not heard anything negative about my leadership skills, although it's sometimes hard to get my 'team members' to respond, I think I'm doing ok.

If you want to sign up, let me know, I'll hook you up. lol...

I'm actually losing weight, that's exciting, since I started 'paying attention' and actually putting an effort into the process I've lost 8 pounds. Ok, the last couple of weeks actually I think this is week three (that's terrible) I haven't 'tried' at all. I have gone running twice, and I'm eating what I feel like, and yeah, really gotta work on that, I was feeling really great, getting more energy, feeling happier a lot of the time, things were just working, then I got a cold and had to stop running for a bit because I couldn't breath then I just haven't gotten back into the groove... what happened? I don't know... Part of me wishes I could figure it out, another part of me (the part that's winning right now) doesn't care, and is too tired to figure it out... how awful!

I really should probably get going, I have a lot of things to do today, and I have a feeling I don't know the half of it... I have to get a lot done in a small amount of time, starting with getting us ready to go to dance class. yep, only intentionally missed one class this year, missed one because we were all sick and missed one because we were in penticton for a funeral, so only 3 missed, that's pretty impressive for me.. I usually miss a lot more then that for things I've 'signed' up for. Mind you it's for Hailey and I want her to learn that when you make a commitment you stick to it. And she does really like dance class, so it's good. Kacie is wanting more and more to get involved, she's less content just to sit on my lap and watch, she wants to crawl away and get in the dancers way. Can't let her do that, I guess it's a good thing that next year Hailey will be able to go into class with out us and I won't have to worry about Kacie disrupting class. Her next swimming lesson is without me as well. I'm of two minds of this Hailey and Kacie growing up thing, it doesn't sadden me to the point where I'm mourning my little babies as they turn into 'children' but it's a little sad because they're getting so big so fast, they're more and more little people as opposed to little babies, and they have minds of their own, and they are doing more and more on their own. Hailey is loving swimming lessons, and I should have put her in the one's where she could do it on her own, and I complain every class when we have to go, but honestly, I'm glad we did it this way, and I'm glad that Jason couldn't really take her, it's been a really great experience to share with her. I love to see it when she figures something out, like putting her head under the water and blowing bubbles instead of breathing in and swallowing a mouthful of water until she chokes on it... or floating on her back and actually staying above water with out me holding on to her, she was so excited, and I was so proud. The look on her face was priceless! She loves the slide, and doesn't even complain now when her head goes under the water, and yesterday I told her that if she blows out and kicks her feet she can 'shoot' herself back up on top of the water, she actually was listening really well last night and we made some huge strides.

Kacie is into EVERYTHING! So curious. Just wants to see what everyone else is doing, and be a part of it. She's feeding herself a bit, she fed herself spaghetti last week, oh man that was funny. She's eating pretty much everything, which is great, but hard because she has no teeth, so we have to keep making some puree for her to make sure she's getting all the food groups. I've been helping mom and dad with reno's on thursdays and it's going great, Hailey wants to 'help' as much as we'll let her and with Kacie we just set her up in the playpen where ever we're working and she's perfectly content to watch or play with her toys. It's actually working out amazingly well.

With the weather turning nicer I have so many hopes for the spring/summer. Camping trips all the time, lots and lots of outdoor activities, bike riding, floating in the river, roller blading, walks everwhere, running with the girls, taking chub with us, a lot more fliers for avon. I'm at about 75 customers I think. I wanted 100 by march. Maybe by summer, that would be ok.. I'm working on it..

well now it's 7:30 and I can hear Kacie talking/whining in her bed and Hailey's been up for 1/2 hour playing with her water color book from Auntie Lindsay. I guess I should get this party started and get my arse in gear.

Keep an eye out for the new site, I have lots of ideas, and keep an eye out for more blogs, or just drop me a line sometime, I'd love to hear from you, my mystery followers, ok, I know you're one lindsay, and I know Cathy checks in from time to time, and then there's the guy who can't speak/type english and wants me to 'sign' up for what ever he's selling, yeah.. by the way, have to go delete that post... ok.. better quickly go find it..

ciao for now,
me

A new post

2009-12-29T01:51:00.002-07:00

So, I'm pretty sure people don't read this, but just incase you do, I'm sorry.... I can only imagine that I must sound completely insane! and pathetic most of the time, but meh, such is life.

Jason and I are thinking about going away to mexico, childless, for a week in feb. I"m excited but at the same time worried. I want to be smaller before we go which means I actually have to lose weight. Yeah, not just talk about it, and all the great theories I have, actually lose weight. I'm not sure I can do it. Jason says I can, and that he'll help me, and be there with me 100% of the way, as he wants to lose weight too. I'm worried he'll make it look really easy and I'll get frustrated and just give up. Sounds like something I'd do. I don't want to do that this time. I actually want to lose weight. What better reward at the end then going to mexico and not be embarassed to go in my bathing suit? Yeah, sounds ok to me. I will try very hard. I got an ipod touch for christmas so I downloaded an app that helps keep track of your food.. a food diary. Everyone says it helps. So I'll give it a shot. I guess nothing will make you think more about what you're eating then if you're recording everything and you can look back and see it.. ewww... so yeah.. gonna try that...

as for exercising, jason got me a nike+ to go with my ipod so now I can keep track of my runs, challenge people on line, see what i"m doing, if I'm getting any better, know how far I've gone. I"m pretty excited about that, went today for 45 minutes, did 5 km in 42.5 mins.. a personal best time.. jason sucks though, he ran strait for 30 minutes, at a 5, I couldn't even run 5 minutes.. I know I know.. everyone is different, but talk about hard to keep your self feeling good when he comes along and blows you out of the water! I know i'm stupid. I'm proud of him, I really am, but I"m also totally jealous. Wish I could do that, wish I could make it look as easy as he makes it look.. wish I could stop wishing and just doing..

nicole keeps saying she's trying out just doing it when she thinks of it rather then just talking about it and says it's working great, just need to do that...

I have tons of great ideas, just need to put them in action, for eating, for exercising, for making more money, for managing what I do have, for the girls, for jason and I, but they are usually trapped in my head, only for me to know, or for other people to hear when I talk about them, not often turning to reality. But sometimes.

My new years resolutions are to try many new recipes, I really want to improve and broaden my cooking skills, so gonna work on that, and then to organize my house. Yep, a new years resolution, this will be the year I finally do it. Purge all sorts of stuff, and just totally organize it. Every room, make them all efficient, and clean, and the way I want them.. not sure when or how to start that, but I have a few more days.. lol.. there I go again.. haven't got time anyway, things to do until after new years... so it will have to wait...

not the exercising though, gonna see how long I can run with out stopping tomorrow.. excited to try.. and going skating with the other part of the coles family. Going with Jason's brother and his wife and going to take all the kids out.. It should be a really good time. I think we'll all have fun. that's a lot of exercising in one day.. go team coles! We can totally do this.

Christmas was great, no dissapointment on my end. I'm usually expecting it, but I will gladly say I was pleasently surprised, completely surpassed my expectations, and I'm very excited about everything i received and the reactions to everything I gave. I think I did good this year.

I know i worry a lot, my mom says it's the cozicar in me... (that came up as a spelling error and I actually thought I had to go fix it for a second.. cozicar in the dictionary.. on my computer.. come on! lol... ok, so i"m not caring too bad about the spelling as you can tell.

Hey, I'm a university student. Yep, start fall 2010. I can't believe it. Lindsay if you read this I really want to tell you in person, but we can't seem to connect, so I'm going to tell you again in person when I see you. Because I really need to do that.. sorry dude.. what a terrible way for me to break that news.. just ignore this past paragraph. Again, excited, nervous, a whole new adventure, worried about how I'm going to handle it and how it's going to affect my already insane life.. why is my life insane? I"m not sure, I need to figure that out and simplify I think, it shouldn't be so insane! it should be simpler. I can work on that, maybe that will be another part of 2010 resolutions, simplify! it's funny, because resolutions are things people say they're going to do and then never actually accomplish, I've been anti new years resolutions for quite some time, but this year, I just feel I need to make some.. a few actually.. I'm going to stop at 3. That is all. Think they're great! and things I can totally stick to.. well the simplify might be a challenge, but I'm going to give it a shot, because I think it could help us all in the end.

So then, what else, I think that should be it. I'm very tired, and it's very late. I wish that some of you (all one reader) would blog so I could read them when I'm up late and can't sleep. Fortunately, that's not right now, because I'm finally tired, I think just getting all that stuff outta my head helped it to relax and will allow me to go to sleep. Thanks for listening, this was exactly what I needed. I wonder if jason will think my blog is dumb. I'll talk to you later,
me

Dealing with it

2009-11-30T15:04:00.002-07:00

What's new with my life? Not too much. My Great Grandma died last weekend, so we went to Penticton to celebrate her life. It was a nice time. Sad circumstances, but a good visit with family I don't see too often. The girls did amazing, from the spending most of 4 days in the car to the weird hours and always being on the go, I can't believe they behaved as well as they did. I'm so proud of them.

My avon is going good. I'm up to 45 customers who have bought from me at least once, and this week it sounds like I'll be adding to my 'downline' which means I'll be getting people on my team and I'll be their leader so I'll benefit from their sales and hopefully be able to help them be successful. The more successful they are the more I am, so it's a win win... So yeah, I'm really working on this whole avon thing. I could work harder, and I will, but it's going well and things are working smoothly right now, I'm even putting some money in my pocket already, so I'm pretty excited about that. It will only go up from here (well except for January being really slow because of the after christmas die off.. but I have some ideas to carry me through.

My dr is going to work with me to help me lose some weight and deal with what ever issues I have that are standing in the way of actually doing that. I'm tired of being the way I am and I don't want my girls to grow up with me being so hard on myself. I can't just completely change my attitude with out changing the way I look and that will help the way I feel. So I just have to work on it. There is no one that can make these changes but me, and so I just have to start listening to what I already know and stop beating myself up everytime I slip up. I just have to keep on trying and not just quit when I miss a day or feel like crap and make an excuse.. I can do this.. I know I can.. so I will... slowly.. even went on the treadmill for 45 minutes today... it's a start.. I'll keep working on it.. I'm thinking I should journal and maybe I'll do it on here so if anyone out there reads this you can keep me accountable and I can get somewhere.. we'll see.. I'm not sure, I'm signed up on Sparkpeople.com and I really like that site so maybe I"ll blog on there about this weightloss journey... as everyone seems to call it.. I just don't want to lose it to get it all back.. I'd die.. I really would.. I haven't got the mental stability to handle that..

Kacie had her 6 month check up today.. she's healthy and growing perfectly, except her head is a little flat on one side so we're going to to see a specialist in a month or so and see if she'll need one of those little helmets to fix it.. I feel terrible but there is nothing I could have done different, she's NOT on her back way more then Hailey ever was, and hailey's fixed it self, so hopefully we can pull that off with the tiny baby, if not, well I guess we'll have to get her a helmet to help fix it... I just don't want her to be mad at the fact that I didn't do it when she was little and then when she's bigger it is a pain if she needs glasses, or she wants to cut her hair short.. so better work on it now... sheesh.. kids.. so much to think about..

Jason cleaned the house while I was gone.. . I'm so excited, it's a million times better then I thought I"d come home to, so I can just maintain.. and I love that... a lot of work still.. ,but I'm trying harder..

this morning I was pretty down on myself... feeling like nothing was going to work and I was going to be fat forever, well now I'm feeing better. I feel like I can do it, I just have to stop being so mean to myself and I have to just try, even if I forget or just don't do something one day that doesn't mean I can never do it again and I have to give up completely... I just have to keep trying. so that's what I"ll do.. I think I can handle that.. I think I will write somewhere about my adventure, maybe writing it down will help.. I even had fruit with my breakfast and my lunch.. go me! well now I have to do my laundry, because it just needs to be folded and put away and then it's all clean.. I can do this.. a little bit at a time..

ciao for now,

me

Boo!

2009-11-06T11:56:00.003-07:00

I'm finding myself to be a total whiner! It doesn't help that I'm feeling exhausted a lot more lately, which isn't helped by the fact that I hardly get any sleep because I'm letting or helping everyone else get their sleep. Yes I'm talking about Jason. A fact that he seems completely oblivious to and when I ask for a day where I can sleep in and catch up on some much need sleep, it seems like I'm a huge pain in his ass and a total inconvenience. Sorry you have a cold sir, but the world doesn't stop.. sure as freak doesn't stop when I'm sick why the frick should it stop when he's sick?

Then there's his spending, I think it's totally out of control, that he has no idea what so ever what is going on with our finances, and he really doesn't care. He goes totally overboard on the garage and other such endeavors and his only advice to help us is that i have to go get a job. Not to work on building my avon business, but to go get some crappy ass evening and weekends sword I'd never do that again job. Working over the christmas holidays, spending all my weekends in a store helping people I don't even want to see.. just so the god damned garage can get a furnace and power and all the rest!

Sorry.. totally bitter today, totally exhausted as not one single one of my family members decided that it would be ok if I got a little bit of sleep..

hold on.. the tiny one is screaming her head off.. have to grab her..

ok.. she's on my knee and much quieter now..

I'm just upset all the time.. I'm upset with the way I look, I'm upset with my lack of energy and motivation, which is all connected to the fact that I should be exercising 5 days a week like my dr said and eating a tiny bit better but I just can't do it.. some sort of mental block is stopping me... it sucks ass... I just want to cry right now.. I want to bawl and I want jason to put his arms around me and tell me it's all gonna be ok, and that we'll figure something out and that it will all work out.. and then to sit down with me and come up with some sort of plan to fix it and then actually stick to it with me, not just expect me to do it or that by some miracle it will just happen.. if you put shit on the credit cards do you think they magically pay for them selves? No? I can't figure out why??? I'm actually considering going to indigo as they recently opened up by my house and applying for a part time Job. I'm just sure I won't find anything in insurance, or multimedia and that's what I know already so I'm totally hooped! I have no experience doing anything, at least not anything that's going to make some sort of decent wage, and so I'm destined to go work in an industry I swore I'd never go back to. I should have just gone back to Sovereign after Hailey was born, I should have just done lots of things different, now I'm totally miserable, and going to have to do something that's going to make me more miserable.. and I'm totally depressed about the whole thing! And there's a tiny baby drooling all over my arm.. yum... yes.. not sure why I'd be depressed about going back into retail, right now my full time occupation is changing diapers, wiping bums and cleaning up shit of all kinds.. sounds like something I'm totally gonna miss.. except that I'll still have to do all that because I'll be working after Jason comes home, so my days will just get busier and more hectic because I'll have to do everything I already never get done plus go out and make money so that jason can add more to his fucking garage!

ok.. a little bitter about the garage.. hope no one actually reads this.. it's totally just a vent from a crazed lunatic who has no idea what hell she's doing which direction she's going and spinning wildly out of control... not to mention I"m sure i"m overly emotional.. fucking pms... just great!

well I'm starving and my eyes are filled with tears so I can't see anyway, and I think Kacie is trying her hardest to give me a hickey on my arm so I'm going to pout by myself now.. just until I come to some miraculous epiphany that solves all my problems.. better go buy a lotto ticket..

ciao,
me

Still going...

2009-09-25T21:27:00.003-06:00

Totally exhausted right now, but for some reason I'm on the computer and wanting to blog instead of going to bed and enjoying the 9-10 possible hours of uninterrupted sleep. Can't figure out what's wrong with my head. So yeah, what am I doing right now.. well I'm applying for university in a week... well just over a week, October 5th. Yeah, can't believe I'm actually going to do it rather then just talk about it. I'm a psycho! (don't know if I spelled that right, oh well.. didn't come up with a red line underneath it so it must be ok... well then, what else, I just got back from the 4th annual gathering of all 5 generations. Yep, went to see my Great Grandma making her Hailey and Kacie's Great Great Grandma, and my mom's grandma and my grandma's mom. Weird hey? I know it's weird, and we did it with all 5 of us girls in one car and one hotel room for the whole 3 days and 2 nights, enough to drive anyone to drink.. except grandma, but I think even she was ready to strangle one of us by the end... she was a good sport about the whole thing.. we had a good time. Great Grandma was happy to see us, and happier that we brought her ice cream. She's a little quieter now and a little less alert then before, but she's 97 years old, so I'm cutting her some slack. I wish everyone else would. When I'm 97, leave me the heck alone and let me do what ever the frick I want... because seriously, I've been putting up with everyone else's crap for the last 97 years... I think I've earned it... She looks good, and I think she'll be around for alot longer, although, admittedly she is not as good as she was in previous years, but again see comment above. Lol...

What else, well my house is a disaster, and jason was going to start another new project, which actually just helps with an older project, but I asked if he could please finish some of the other stuff before he started another something.. seriously does he have to just start everything and finish nothing? What a pain in the ass for someone who gets stressed out by the unfisnished... (this coming from the girl who has been working on the 7 dwarfs cross stitch for the last 15 years.. but that stresses me too, hence the reason I'm working on it to get it finished so I can stop thinking about it.. drives me batty!!!)

Yeah, I'm working on the last dwarf by the way, have his shoes, pants, shirt, and arms done, so just gotta do his head and latern, well his beard, face, eyes, mouth, hat and lantern... so yeah... then a little bit on the last 4 dwarfs and then back stitching.. wow.. slowest cross stitcher in the world..

My avon isn't doing too bad. I'm getting roughly 1 new customer a week, which in a year is 52 new customers. Hopefully they all keep ordering from me, or that would suck. My manager is coming over on sunday to help me grow my business, to give me some pointers and help me get some people working under me so I'm getting commissions off of their sales.. that would rock.. all because she was walking in Mckenzie towne and saw one of my little signs.. go jo! and she was with someone from head office and they were both excited.. even better! Go Jo again! I rock.. so hoping that this gets a little bigger and I get some good cash flow coming in, pay some things off, save for school, or a trip, get some extra spending money, it would all be great.... Can't wait! Save lots for school, darn jason and his being successful, now I have to pay for my own friggen university all on my own right from the start, because they won't give me any student loans.. boo....... totally shitty.. I guess I could go apply for some scholarships, but again, I'm sure jason jumps us out of that bracket.. which in some ways is good, but in other ways is not so good... just gotta figure it out though, if the avon thing does good, then maybe when I'm a teacher I still be selling avon and making a crazy amount of money.. we'll be laughing all the way to the bank..

I tried my weight loss yoga today, it was great.. I only did level 1, I think I probably should have gone at least to level 2, but I was pretty tired and sore so I figured I'd try again later..

well gonna go to bed now, I could chat on here for hours and I really am tired..

nite

and the day after...

2009-09-11T14:43:00.002-06:00

well I'm still here. And feeling better albeit very tired right now. I ran my 5 k on the treadmill (which regardless of what paula says is way harder then it was outside) and sorta tried my weightloss yoga dvd, well died in the first few minutes, so stopped... cleaned the shower, have some wash in the washer, some in the drier, couple more loads just to make in the washer, but will get to those... got a sore on my leg from running because my fav pants are getting a hole in them (better fix that), so i'm not going to go try to sell my avon today.. monday I will...

and yeah.. things are going ok. Yesterday turned out to be better then I thought, and I think the little baby is sleeping so I might go crash on the couch for a little while..

ciao for now,
me

meh

2009-09-10T10:36:00.002-06:00

I just feel down today... yeah.. not a great way to come back to a blog I haven't written in forever, but I don't know who to phone and what to say if I did phone, so I'll just type on here. I didn't get a ton of sleep, so I could just be tired, and I could be pms-ing as that is next week, I could just be down. Financial reasons, physical reasons, just every reason. I know where I want my life to go and I can't seem to make it get there. I hate being broke but right now that's exactly what we are, we totally over exerted ourselves, we wont' be able to pay our way out of this one for a very long time. I have no idea what to do, who to turn to, how to fix it. My head feels like it's going to explode and all I want to do is crawl into bed and cry. I don't think that will help. I'm trying this avon thing, and I keep hearing about all the money other rep's make, and I want to know how, I want to do well but I'm not. I'm just starting I know, I have to give it a little time. These people I'm hearing about have been doing to for years and years... some like 10 or 20 years. I wish I could just be by myself today to wallow in my own self pitty, but not sure what I'd do with the girls. I started upgrading and things went well, got good marks on both courses, but now I'm grinding to a halt because I have no money to pay for the next steps. Jason hasn't head a full pay cheque since may I think and my avon isn't doing nearly as well as I was hoping. and I'm not sure what to do about that. Not to mention we've been living the high life and we haven't slowed down for anything and now it's totally catching up to us. I wish I could sign us up on till debt do us part so that Gail could fix it all and just tell us how to make it better, and how we're going to pay it all off in two years and everything will be great, but I just don't see that happening... grr... what am I going to do? I have no idea what's so ever... except sit here and feel sorry for myself. Not exercise, not go out and try to sell avon (Which I can't do anyway because I have no books) not read or cross stitch, not go play with the girls, not go watch tv, not go check on hailey because I have a sinking suspicion that she pooped her pants and I really don't want to deal with that... not check kacie because she'll wake up and then I'll have to do that whole routine and I don't want to... (although she has been sleeping since 6:30 this morning so she's bound to wake up at some point and after all that sleep she's bound to be up for a good long time.. and not go to the grocery store because I can't really afford anything there anyway so what good will that do me.

on an up note, our garage is up, and it has a door that works. We've already paid for a man door that's waiting to come in. I have tried to order shingles but I'm not sure when they'll be in, and yeah, we're siding it next year (mind you we were building it next year too, and there it stands in all it's depressing, spent money we totally didn't have glory) and the basement. My parents are living down there, so I've been spending more money trying to get it finished for them, I thought they would pitch in and give us a little bit of rent, but jason told them not to worry about it so no, no help there, and my parents aren't the type who just give you money for no reason, we already said no, so they have it set in there heads that they don't have to pay and they won't just offer something like that up.. why did he say no, why didn't he say we'll talk about it? They could at least offer a little bit to help out, I'm totally losing out on the grocery deal and they are putting in every freaking recpiept, even for things we aren't getting.. ok..I'm a bit bitter about that whole scenario so I better change topics because no one wants to read about that...

I just don't know what to do... I just want to go back under my covers and hide.. and not come out until someone else has fixed it...

oh and I have to go to penticton with my mom and grandma the week after next because we do it every year and we're headed out there, even though I have no money, they have it semi-figured out and what ever.. and we're doing the whirlwind trip in 3 days, 1 day to drive there one day to be there, one day to drive home.. sounds great! then the second I get home I get my avon delivery in and then jason leaves for a weekend camping trip with 'the boys' for a stag and there's a staggette that weekend that I'm pretty sure I"m not going to, but I should, but that's not really my scene and I dont' really know anyone besides the bride and her maid of honor...so yeah.. not sure about that....

well then what else... just not sure..

want to whine more but there is a three year old hanging off my chair.. and a little baby upstairs who's starting to stir and I have to make some formula for her because she will be really hungry when she finally does wake up and it's 11 and I havent' done anything today except mope around and whine on here...

so if you have any suggestions on weight loss, how to make a better avon business, how to make a lot of money, or how to manage the money I do have and pay a lot of things off while at the same time saving money for other things..

Need to Learn

2009-07-07T08:23:00.002-06:00

I really need to learn to lock my car after I go into it for something.. too many times I forget and it was just a matter of time before someone rifled through it and tried to take something. Thankfully last night there was nothing to be taken except for a loony. SUCKER! So Jason wakes me up telling me that someone went through our car and asks if there was anything valuable in it? Heart attack #1. I realize our Tom Tom was in it is it gone? No. Thank goodness. Then I get down stairs and go out there, check it out, nothing is missing, the car is just a mess from all the junk I obviously store everywhere... and the bastards smoked in my car while going through it so now my car smells like smoke. Again, Bastard!

Back to bed, as it is only 5:45 am! Write a list of what to pack for the girls for PEI, snooze a smidge, Kacie wakes up, feed her, drift off again, Hailey wakes up crawls in bed with me and Kacie, turn on her shows, snooze again... Phone rings, Jason calling, is my wallet on the counter in the kitchen. (On a side note the day before he got soaked at work and his wallet was soaking wet, even when it's not wet and we go out shopping he has a habit of leaving it in the middle of the durango infront of the consol.. Heart attack #2! Oh shit we're leaving for vacation in 2 days and his fricken wallet just got stolen! @#$! tear apart the house, freak out, call my mom to see if she can stay in the house with the girls while I walk down the ally because it's garbage day and maybe the bastard dropped the wallet in someone's garbage can or recycle box and Jason isn't with out any ID or credit cards or the such for our holiday... just then, I move a bag on the kitchen table and AHHHHHH... angels sing, there is his wallet... soaking wet still.. but who cares it's there.. I hugged the cold, damp stinky thing... it was great! Never been so relieved.. thank god!

so that is how my day started... 2 near heart attacks and still haven't figured out that I need to lock my doors when I leave my car..

on a totally different note, I went to get some clothes for the trip last night and am thoroughly depressed on the state of my body because it's big and flabby and I'm so freakin' out of shape that I can't stand it and all that makes me do is want to eat junk, not want to exercise, I've been saying for 2 weeks now that I'm going to go on the treadmill everyday for 1/2 hour and walk and I don't or I'm going to go outside and walk, and walk.. I'm not doing any of it.. I'm freaking out.. I hate the way I look and feel right now, about as sexy as a big lumpy potatoe.. it's brutal.. need a plan.. might join nicki.. seems like she has a good plan.. going to go to PEI in 2 days and Iook like shit and I'm the biggest I've been, and I can't stand that they are going to take my picture... stay behind the cammera.. my only salvation...

ok.. well better go eat breakfast, and actually go on the treadmill and then get my unit 5 quiz done so I can work on unit 6... gotta get some stuff done... and about a billion errands.. running..

me

Here again!

2009-07-06T16:05:00.002-06:00

And I'm back.

I'm trying to get some math homework done, and my brain is officially mush, so I have to take a bit of a break. I just need to let my brain breath. Then I'll be fine. Unfortunately homework doesn't get done if you're not actually working on it. I just finished the trig unit, well nearly, I finished all the lessons, I have to do the review and then I could write the quiz and then I'm done. And I'm on the second to last unit which is kinda exciting, except that I wanted to have it completed before I left for PEI and it doesn't look like that is going to happen. Oh well, I'll keep plugging away.

Went camping this weekend. Had a ton of fun. Got to go out fishing, I caught a fish and Hailey caught a fish, it was pretty exciting... breaks my 3 year streak of not catching fish, it was with a spinning rod, but a fish is a fish I say. Camper worked great, love camping.. especially in my camper.. glad Jason convinced me to get it. Really enjoying it. Just have to get out more, although we're actually going quite a bit when it all comes down to it.

I haven't even got the brain power to write here, I'll have to be back later,
ciao,
me

Dude it's been a while...

2009-06-26T09:58:00.003-06:00

So a bit has happened since my last update. I had Kacie, May 27, 2009. She's a beautiful baby girl with lots of hair, redish hair, it's cute... She was 7 lbs 9 oz, and she was 19 inches long. She is perfectly healthy and her delivery was really quick. I'm talking 2 hours from first contraction to her breathing in the world on her own... Insanity. No drugs, no time to get my suitcase together, just pure craziness.

I finished my english course. Yep, even the diplomas are done. So now I just have to focus on math. I hope I can get it all done. The diploma in August and there's still a lot of work to do and I have a million plans this summer... so yeah, hoping it can all get done with out me losing my mind. Oh, too late for that last part.

I was just thinking to day, I'd be totally ok if I could just get the services of Gayle from Till Debt Do Us Part to fix my finances (or just to give me a budget and a game plan I can stick to, Tommy from Last 10 pounds Boot Camp to get me into shape and teach me how to eat properly, The lady from Nanny 911 to help me potty train Hailey, and the team from Clean Sweep to organize my house and finish it all off. I'd be totally set. Unfortunately I don't see any of them rushing over here any time soon, so I'm on my own. Too many things to do and too little time, motivation and money...

Last night we went out for drinks, Cathy's Birthday, Nicole's second last day of school at Sherwood and me finishing my english course completely. We went to the new Brewstwer's roof top patio... it was great... I had 4 beers I think, and well I couldn't believe how much it cost to go out for a night. I guess that's why I don't do it very often. I can think of way to many other things to spend money on. Crazy hey. I guess I just need to get a job so that I can have more money to spend. But not till september. I have to just make it through this summer alive I don't need to add a job on top of that. I won't make it. Not enough time. Besides can you imagine what my availability would be like... "So I can't really work more then maybe 1/2 a day a week until september, but could you just pay me full wages because I really need the money" as if that wouldn't be beautiful. lol.

well now it's 10 after 10 and I have to get 1-2 lessons done in math, go to costco to pick up stuff for danielle's bridal shower tomorrow, go the health centre to see how much Kacie weighs and how long she is because she's a month old tomorrow and I'd like to know, and clean my house, well only my bedroom the girls rooms, all the laundry and then clean all the floors. If I had money I'd also go to Ikea and get some bins to fit in the shelves in the play room so I could organize the bugger because it's a disaster... yikes.. sooooooo... much to do.... just have to get on it... so if any of you are ever bored, just let me know, I have lots you can do.. like weeding my front flower beds and then weeding my garden and rototilling so I can plant some stuff in it before summer is over.... simple things like peas and radishes... hopefully i'll still get some stuff..

ok.. ciao for now,
me

I'd like to think...

2009-05-23T08:13:00.002-06:00

I always think that I'm a fly by the seat of my pants, what ever happens happens kinda gal. But I guess when it all comes down to it. I'm not really like that.

I like to have a plan. It relaxes me, calms me, reassures me that I'm not just spinning wildly out of control, and allows me to measure what I've actually accomplished in a very easy manner.

This morning I have a whole bunch of little errands and such to do, but I have list and I know what order I need to stop at what place to make the most sense out of it all, and I'm feeling confident. Oddly enough the only thing holding me back right now is the sleeping baby who doesn't seem to want to wake up. I guess that's what a full day of playing at Nana's house, gardening at home and then a late supper will do to a three year old. She almost fell asleep in her ice cream cake.. it was cute.

I'm pretty much done my english class. I'm on the last unit. The only bits of actual work I have to do are write a poem and then basically analyze my own poem and then analyze someone else's poem (of the teacher's pick of course, in the form of a timed quiz). I am signed up for a review class next thursday, then anytime in the two weeks after that I have to write my in class final, and then I'm set for the diplomas.. I can't believe I'm actually so close to being done one of these courses. Then I can focus on the math for the remainder of the summer and write that in August. It won't be so bad. As long as I don't leave it completely. Dedicate a few hours every couple of days to getting it done. It will still prove to be an excellent summer. Lots of pool/lake/camping time and time to just hang out with friends. I'm all over it.

I was going to put up a post last friday, before a whole weekend of craziness happened, but I never got the chance. I was having the very best day. The sun was shining the baby was at Nana's house I was talking to people I wanted to catch up with, homework was getting done (ok very little but still some) then I had plans and Paula and LJ brought me lunch and yeah, it was just a great day. Then Paula and LJ and I decided we were going to go see Angels and Demons and go to the pub before for supper. On the way there I'm waiting at the lights of a pretty busy intersection. About three car lengths away from the intersection in the turn lane, when my car decides to die. Yep, no starting it at all.. Big Durango, little tiny (comparitively) pregnant Joie. Total freak out. I just picked it up from the dealership the day before because it was broken, and now it was MORE broken then it was before. NOT GOOD. Rush hour on the friday of a long weekend, INSANITY!!! People were nearly getting into accidents because they were in such a hurry to get around me. Totally scary! To shorten this sad story the towtruck took the beast back to the dealership where they said "if it's our fault we'll pay for the towing" Who's freaking fault did they think it was, there was litterally gas spewing from the gas tank all over the road. The fire department showed up with the lights and sirens blaring cleaned up the spilled fuel, Jason came and picked me up and we went to the movie anyway. And ended up going to the pub after instead. The next day they say they fixed it (I got a wicked sun burn from watching Jason and Danny put a roof on a garage and forgetting my sun screen) and I go to get my car again. I make it one block away and there is once again no power and gas spilling all over the road! Way to go BIG 4 Motors, great fix job!!! so call them up (because I can see the freaking dealership still) they pick me up, put me in an ugly gold mini van (it was new, but I don't like gold and I don't like mini vans, so therefore it was ugly) and I'm off again. Saturday we hung out with my cousin from edmonton and Paula and LJ and then sunday saw them all again and then went to the garden centre, which I think could make anyone happy, especially since I was allowed to buy stuff, and then did some gardening, went to Shawn and Nicole's for burgers over the fire, and monday was pretty lazy. It was great!

Tuesday they said they fixed my car again but the mechanic said he was going to take it home to cochrane and make sure it was better. It's saturday, it's driven quite a bit, and it's still ok, so I think this crisis has passed.. Good I didn't want to actually have to bomb big 4.. I couldn't run them over because my car barely moved... so bombing it was going to have to be...

So yeah, compared to that, this week has been pretty quiet. besides nearly finishing my homework, that's about all I did. So hoping to get my flowers in today, which means I have to finish weeding my front flower bed, and get all my little errands done. Maybe swing by the 'stinky' house and see what's happening there. They're roofing the garage and house today, hopefully they get it done so they don't have to go back tomorrow.. we'll see though, that's a pretty tall order.

Wow I had a lot to say. Still no baby. But only 14 more possible days until she comes so that's making me feel better... hopefully she shows up on or before her due date, that would be even better!! I'd be so excited.. but I'm not holding my breath..

The baby's still sleeping.. actually I think she's reading, I can hear movement but she hasn't come out of her room yet. Sometimes she likes to just sit in bed and read her stories.. It's cute. She was telling us stories this week. Yep, recited the three little pigs, the whole story, not missing any details, the cutest thing ever, I really should catch it on video.. Maybe I'll try that.. that's one of those things you never want to forget... She also does a version of Jack and the bean stalk, and The three little bears. It's great!

Ok, well I really do have other things, we all know me, I could talk forever, so I better go accomplish something. Sorry this isn't an exciting blog where I have exciting things to talk about, just me, and the goings on in my life, which are usually not that exciting.. but at least it's something to read.

Ciao,
me

Some funny Shiznit...

2009-05-13T16:00:00.003-06:00

What I need and where I need it... Cervesa, pool side
Not sure what Shiznit is, but it works for me in this case so I'm going with it...

So I was on Facebook, as my 1 or two readers know I'm totally obsessed with it... and there was an ad for a blog.. themotherload

I clicked on it, not sure what made me do it, but from there I have found at least 4 other blogs that I have also started reading and this stuff is great. So much to read about other people's lives. So far it seems to be all mom related, but I don't think you need to be a mom to be amused by this stuff. The first was http://carlycooper.typepad.com/ and then that lead to: http://latherrinseandrepeat.wordpress.com/and http://latherrinseandrepeat.wordpress.com/ and http://cheatymonkey.com/ The chick in this last one is really quite funny. I was giggling while reading it...

She's a yoga instructor on sundays.. what a great job that would be.. I think I need to seriously decide one way or another.. I think I'd either like to be a teacher or a fitness instructor of some sort.. the fitness instructor would take care of two birds with one stone because I'd get into shape (I'm guessing instructors get some sort of deal on gym passes) and I'd make money... I think that would be great.. ok.. september.. I'm seriously going to look into and pick one... sounds like a plan to me...

So still no baby.. waiting.. I'm so sore and so tired.. and I asked the dr today if there was anything I could do to alleviate the pain, she told me some really great advice.. "have the baby". yeah.. I'll get right on that.. everyone is telling me I can have it this day or that.. well I'm really working on it.. she just doesn't care... yeah that's right.. stubborn already, I'm in so much trouble with these girls of mine.... I started pulling some weeds out of the front garden, I really want to put some plants and flowers in there.. I love it when a garden looks nice.. I'm thinking though it's still pretty stinkin' early.. so I'm waiting.. but maybe I can talk Jason into painting the trim on the house this weekend.. I'd be really excited... or just doing random jobs around the house all weekend. Like working on the basement.. finishing the last couple of touches on the nursery, moving dirt off my garden into the front yard so we can put some grass seed down and start the patching process.... maybe pricing out how much it would cost to put a sidewalk down the side of the house, how much it would cost to finish the dog run and other necessary pieces to make that work, and how much it would cost to change the trim on the house from cedar to smart board.. (needs less maintenance.. ) amongst other things.. like cleaning windows and well anything I can think of, I'll probably only last for a few hours in the morning each day, but well it's the thought that counts.. and he bosses people around all day 5 days a week, he can stand to take a few orders for a few days.. lol... Cathy thinks I'll have the baby this weekend.. god I hope she's right.. but I'm not getting my hopes up.. I'm kinda figuring it will be another 25 more days from today.. yeah.. June 7... just cuz I'm not one of the lucky few who gets to have her baby early... apparently it's just way to comfortable in there, or I just have lazy babies, or I dunno... I just can't have them early... but fingers crossed.. maybe Cathy will be right... I'm done... I want to be me again.. sole inhabitant of my own body... yeah.. like the end result, but not the process.. just incase I hadn't put that on here before.

well I'm about 450 words into a 1500-2000 word essay on Shakespeare's Hamlet, and I haven't done any math this week. I better get my arse in gear or I really will waste my entire summer doing school work... gotta aim for the june diplomas in English.. I can do it... I hope..

ok.. runnin..

me

Too Many things...

2009-05-06T11:22:00.003-06:00

Maybe Hailey can fix it all?
I think my problem is I want too much.. I want a nice yard which takes a lot of work. I want a good career that makes me feel good about myself, that I'm accomplishing something, and in order to get that I have to upgrade and or do more schooling, which takes a lot of time and effort. I want a happy healthy family, which means I have to spend time taking care of them, and their needs and just having fun with them as much as possible, which also takes a lot of time. I want to be in good shape, and fit, so I can enjoy myself with my family doing all the activities I want, and so I feel better about myself, and that for sure takes a lot of work...

I want a nice house that I can be proud of and that I don't care if or when people stop by because it's clean and organized. And on that same note, that's not just for everyone else, if my house was 'completed' then I would have more time for all the other stuff listed above... and I wouldn't ever worry about it... I love my house, it's just not 'done' yet. A long way till it gets there I think.. (you should see the 'great big freakin' to do list) and if it were organized and clean I would have to spend less time cleaning and organizing it or looking for things that should just be put away...

I want a well behaved dog who doesn't bark at the door everytime anyone or anything goes past the window, and who doesn't mess in the house so I don't have to clean it up.. Although he has been much better for the last couple of months, so maybe I'm getting somewhere with that.. well the messing part, not the barking.. he needs a lot of time and attention to cure this problem I think...

I think I just want to be good at everything.. and have everything.. and I'm not catching on that you just can't... at least not at the moment.. well I can't anyway.. I have to finish my schooling that I've currently signed up for to free up time for the rest of the stuff, and still pay attention to Hailey and still try to do some house work so that we don't live in a total sty because that would kill me...

and now that I'm done my rambling about all the things I want, I have to get to my school work because in a few hours I have to go to the dr and I wanted to get a lot of school work done and some gardening, and laundry and I have to pack before tomorrow when I go to Edmonton..

ciao for now,
me

Fat, Lazy and Overwhelmed...

2009-04-27T11:50:00.003-06:00

That pretty much sums me up right now...

A ton of things on my mind to do, and none of which are actually getting done. The simplest household chores are making me more tired then I feel necessary, and the list to do goes on and on..

I went to Edmonton Saturday afternoon till sunday afternoon and Jason.. well he did the dishes... that's a start I guess.. he doesn't seem to understand when I'm at home and get stuff done and he makes it feel like I hardly did anything or need to work harder, but then when he stays home he's upset when I'm dissapointed at how little he accomplishes... it's like he can't do anything when Hailey is around, so he just does nothing... but expects the total opposite from me.. figure that out... when I question him about it he says it's boring to do house stuff (work/repairs what ever) by himself.. yeah.. really?? That's a crazy crazy thought.. but some of us have to get over it, or nothing would ever get done...

there are just so many things.. and I feel like I've been neglecting things so that I could get my school work done and I've been working so hard on school work, and yet I'm not going to make it for the june diplomas.. figure that out.. all that work.. and I'm not going to make it.. ridiculous... I'm so upset by this... all that effort... and I'm still going to have to waste my whole summer studying and doing school work because I'm not going to make it... grr.... and that's really the reason for this entry... well all the frustration really.. just not sure what to do... not sure how to get it all done, and make it all happen in the time frame I want it to happen.. it's may this week.. yeah.. it's april right today.. but at the end of the week it's may and that means this month I'm supposed to have a baby, and I'm supposed to finish my courses, the nursery should be done and the basement should have been done a long time ago... so many things... grrrrrrrr....

well this post isn't helping like I thought it would.. I think I may need to actually talk to a person.. jay would be my first choice, but I might as well talk to a wall.. it's just as useful when it comes to these kind of thoughts..

ok.. well lets see if I can accomplish something..

The difference a day can make

2009-04-15T11:10:00.003-06:00

I made this my background on my desktop to keep me motivated. Doesn't that just say "Keep it up Mom!"

Well, I still wish I didn't have to do school work all the time, but it's my own fault. I've had this stuff since August last year and I should have put more effort in before so that I didn't have to work on it all the time now. And I should feel lucky. I'm not working at an office or away from the home, I'm here everyday with Hailey, I can see her and spend time with her when ever I want, so even if it's not as much as I'd like, it's more then many other working mom's. I did a 20 minute pilates workout this morning (thanks for that dvd when I was pregnant with Hailey, Lindsay, it's the first time this pregnancy I've used it, but I forgot how good it made me feel) Many more uses to come. And nicole had it until a few weeks ago... but yeah, did that made me feel really good, relaxed and energized at the same time, if that makes any sense. I got some math and english done yesterday, not as much as I'd like, but I just have to not give up, keep going... and it helped that as I was taking notes on Trigonometry Hailey came and "want to sit on your lap mom". So she coloured with my high lighters while I took my notes. She was doing math too. It was cute, and helpful. Right now she's playing in the tub while I write this and then work on some more english. It will all get done.. it has too, and I've had offers of help which makes me feel good. I'm glad to know that the people I'd do anything for will return the favor if and when I need it. Thanks, It really means a lot to me.

So one day at a time. One thing at a time. It will all get done, maybe not as efficiently as I'd like, but it will get done. I can do it.

So off to english for me.

Just had to update that I'm feeling better and the outlook is looking better..

ciao for now,
me

It's hard

2009-04-14T13:32:00.003-06:00

You have no idea how hard it is to concentrate on your school work like you should when your cutest little two year old is looking at you with those big blue eyes telling you that she doesn't think you want to do school work she says you want to paint a picture with her or play toys or just anything as long as your doing it together.. poor kid spends hours just hanging out in my office while I waste time and not do school work because I'm too busy checking facebook, emailing, chatting on MSN or writing in this blog.. what kind of fool am I? I feel aweful. Probably just hormones but seriously brought tears to my eyes.. all I want to do is go with her and do what ever she wants...

I keep telling myself when this course is over I'm all hers, except that the new baby will be here and I'll be preoccupied with her... what do I do? There are so many things that I want to do and have to do, that I kinda feel like she's getting the short end of the stick. All she wants to do is play or paint a picture.. She doesn't even want to watch shows.. I feel terrible..

ok.. well enough wasting time..I really want to go play or paint.. so I have to get my work done..

bye,

me

What if?

2009-04-08T15:13:00.002-06:00

What if I just gave up on the whole upgrading thing? I'm tired. And tired of sitting in front of this computer not completly understanding what I'm doing.. ok, lately I haven't had any idea what I'm doing, which is making it take more time rather then less time and it's really discouraging... I was going to throw in the towel months ago and then for some reason I decided to stick it out, and I'm really wondering why I did that? I'm wishing I could just spend time with Hailey and work on other things, and read my book and be having a nap right now since hailey's been sleeping all afternoon and that won't happen again for who knows how long, and ... I'm totally whining.. and avoiding the stupid school work.. what to do?? If i just quit now then I don't have to worry about it any more.. it's gone, done no more.. but then if I decide I really want to pursue a university education then I'm going to have to start all over again, and I'm past the half way point.. not close enough to the finish to see the light at the end of the tunnel, but past half way anyway... oh.. I'm just tired, and I don't want to do it any more.. It's hard, and it takes a lot of motivation and determination and I'm afraid I don't have either of those... What do I do?

I'm so confused? pro's con's.. they're all there, and what do I want to do about it...?????? I think I want to give up... but at the same time I want to finish... grrr.....

kinda need someone to talk to right at the moment, but there really isn't any one available at this time of the day..

ok.. well I can phone my math teacher and ask her for help about the dumb worksheet I'm working on, maybe I can get it finished... I"m totally running out of steam though, would really like to throw in the towel. Just yesterday I had a big theory that I could finish all the school work really quickly and just be done with it.. but I don't have the will power to pull that off.. and I don't understand enough to do that with out a lot of help from my teachers...

ok.. off to get more help,

me

Making Bread

2009-03-23T09:50:00.002-06:00

Who knew making bread was such a long process. Worth it, completely as it's delicious, but long none the less.

That's what we did sunday. Jason, Hailey and I made 7 loaves of bread. Mostly because the recipe that my mom has makes 7 loaves. I've never made bread before, and it's been a really long time since anyone I know has made bread when I was around, so it was quite the learning experience. For instance, with Quick Rising yeast, you don't have to put it in water and let it rise before adding it to the other ingredients. Nope, it just makes everything really huge. And when you bread has reached as size that suits you, you don't have to keep letting it rise just because the recipe says to let it rise for 2 hours.. The bread is HUGE. Too funny really. Oh well, we'll know better for next time.

Went to mom and dad's friday, nothing exciting. Saturday we woke up and I had all these grand ideas of what we should do because there is a lot to be done, and we went to the zoo. Way better option, except for the fact that I'm the most out of shape person right now, and walking that long makes me very sore, so I was a little hurting after. But Hailey and her Grandma had a great time so that's all that matters. Fun was had by all. And we got to see the Koalas.. they're boring.. they sleep 20 hours of the day.. what are the odds you're actually going to see them move? Slim to nil I'd say.. oh well they're little bodies were still cute..

After we hung out with Shawn and Nicole which was great.. don't see them too much any more with Nicole being so crazy at school... found out that the 'rich kids' of Mahogany are going to have to go to Sherwood and possibly banting and best (nicole's school in ogden) made me howl. I don't feel so bad that Hailey's designated school is Queensland any more.. Although Mckenzie Town Elementary is supposed to open Fall 2010 which is when Hailey will be starting school so I'm not worried.. it will all work out well.... Just have to be on the ball and make sure I get her registered in that school...

Well I really should get going and do some school work.. just felt like putting something up here.. nothing exciting happened, but oh well, this is really more for me then you so I'm ok with a boring post...

Ciao for now,
me

Been a while...

2009-03-20T14:40:00.002-06:00

Not much new and exciting on the home front. The basement is inching closer and closer to completion. One big push (or a maybe a day's worth of work) and it would be finished. Hmm.. some day. Lol. Not too worried. The guys who were supposed to be 'professionals' installing the granite counter top in our bathroom down stairs messed up on the placement of our sink and then when they came back to try again they broke our sink into several little pieces and said someone would be in contact with us. Haven't heard anything from them it's been at least a week since then. Yay! Hopefully we can get another sink and get it installed properly... yeesh.. that one counter has been more troublesome then the rest of the basement.

School is going well. I'm making progress which is always good. I think I need to move faster, but at least I'm moving. Trying to get it done. Right now I'm doing Conics in Math and Hamlet in English. Both of which are a bit of challenge because I don't completely understand them, but I'm figuring things out as I go along. From the little self tests in English I'm not totally out to lunch in my interpretations of the play, and in Math, well we'll see.. Got a little cocky on the first lesson in this unit and didn't do very well, so I was a lot more careful on the second lesson, which is how I usually do it anyway because I'm not usually very good at math. So yeah. Hopefully I'm doing ok. I should be working on another lesson right now, but I am taking a little break. Read Josh's blog, need to get a snack, already checked Facebook and there's nothing new going on out there with anyone I know... so it's kinda slow around here right now.

Only 30 more weeks until the newest baby Coles is due. I'll be glad when that is over, and I'm sure everyone around me will be too as I'm not the happiest pregnant person. It's not that I'm not happy I guess, more that I complain a lot.. I don't like being pregnant. I'd like to be the sole occupant of my body again. I have good reason though, I'm very short in the torso, so when the baby comes to 3 or more inches above where my rib cage begins, it's not very comfortable. All that room she's taking up, well there used to be organs in there that have had to find temporary lodging for the time being... So yeah, it's not the greatest experience. I'm done. I'd like her to just be here now. Alas, only 2.5 more months.. seems like not that long and at the same time, seems like forever.

If you haven't checked out Josh's blog, you really should, the link is on the side of this thing somewhere. It's really fascinating and he takes really amazing pictures. Check it out. The others aren't updated very often, so if you've looked in the last little while, they're probably still at the same place.

We've gotten some stuff for the new baby. Bedding and a few little clothes. The most adorable little bathing suit. We have to paint the nursery still. It's already painted, but it's all one color. I want to add some fun element to it. Hailey is totally in a 'big girl' bed. She loves it. Hasn't fallen out at all. I can't believe how big she is. She amazes me every day. I just love watching her and being a part of her life. It's like when she discovers something I discover it all over again, and her excitement is contagious. The attitude she already has though doesn't entirely surprise me, she may have her dad's eyes and hair color even look like him (although I don't think she looks like either of us) but she seems more like me all the time. Poor Jason.. there's going to be three of us to deal with. That guy is going to be prematurely old! Oh well, he loves us.. and I'm a lot better then I used to be, so hopefully he rubs off on the girls a lot more then I think he will.... *snicker*

Seems like everyone is having babies right now.. or pregnant or just had a baby.. either way.. babies everywhere... or just that most people I know are in the same place in their lives so now is the time to start their families. Works out good.. the kids will have someone to play with when we all get together.. works out well..

Just incase I didn't say so before... this is for sure the last for Jason and I... two girls and we're finished.. not ever trying for another. I'm just not that excited about being pregnant again... ever.. and this time I really mean it.. Hailey isn't an only child, she'll have all those experiences that only a sibling can provide, and I'm more then ok with that.

We're headed to PEI in July. I'm totally excited. I can't wait. Jason's family is having a 200 years of Coles in Canada reunion. And after they came to Canada from England they originated in PEI. So we're headed there to meet, well at least 150 Coles we didn't know before. Should be a really great time. Once in a lifetime opportunity. And the east coast is supposed to be really spectacular to see! Should be fun. Baby Coles will be all of a month, maybe a little more. Should be exciting...

I keep saying this summer I'm not doing anything but enjoying myself.. Although all the things I want to do to 'enjoy' myself sounds like I could be quite busy... only I could pull that off. I want to go camping a lot in the new trailer, I want to sun tan a lot, I want to get the yard looking really nice, because the last yard was ideal, so I have to get this one to that standard. I want to go for lots of walks, and bike rides with the family, well no bike riding for the newest addition this summer, but Hailey loves going out... I want to go to the lake with Nicole or Paula or who ever will take me.. maybe get out to the Shushwap with Nicole to see how she spent all her summers for as long as she can remember. Do some fishing, maybe finish a project or two. So basically all fun stuff, no work, no school work, not till september, then I'll figure something out...

I'm working on sticking to a budget, I'm not very good with that, like everything else, I know all the theories and all the concepts but I just don't seem to be able to stick to anything.. Some day... Soon.. I'll get it.. Especially if I want to take off the summer.. lol...

I'd really like to try a triatholon.. not sure how to go about training for one of those, but I know someone who did one, so maybe she has some pointers.. Maybe next summer.. Maybe the end of next summer (as in 2010). Maybe next spring I'll sign up for a marathon first.. just to see if I can do it.. I'd like to do one of those too... there are so many things I'd like to do or try or anything.. I think that's the problem.. I want to try everything, and I never give anything the attention it deserves.. some day.. I'll do that too..

I'm in a funny mood incase you couldn't tell by this chapter of this novel. Not really nostalgic, or melancholly, but not really anything different... I just feel like I should be doing more, putting more effort into everything, and at the same time like I dont' want to put effort into anything at all. I'm a walking contradiction.. it's great!... love feeling like I'm always contradicting myself... or that I am simply a big contradiction...

ok.. gonna go have a snack and then attempt to get some more math done..

ciao,
me

A solution

2009-02-11T15:02:00.003-07:00

I notice that I talk about the same thing often on here. Which means that a solution has yet to be found or at least followed through for the initial problem.

I'm often overwhelmed. I guess I get overwhelmed easy. Right now, I'm seriously trying to find a way to not get that way. To some how identify the problem, and then come up with a reasonable completely achievable solution.

So things that overwhelm me...
1. Too many ideas, no time/motivation/money to accomplish them
2. School work
3. House work
4. Relationships
5. Myself!
6. Things getting started and never finished
7. Exercise and living a 'healthy' lifestyle
8. Me

So now that I've identified that, what to do about it. Well the obvious solution would be to finish things. That would help. Next just to take things one step at a time. Can't accomplish everything all at once. It's not possible. As the saying goes, Rome was not built in a day. So I just need to accept that I can't accomplish everything.

I'm sure if I got into the some sort of exercise habbit that would help all the other aspects. I really should try that. Maybe as soon as I'm done typing I'll go on the treadmill for 30 minutes. Maybe that will help clear my head. Maybe I'll try starting the day with that. I could do that.

I need to not put so much pressure on myself. Not worry about others so much, and just try to do things that make me happy. Oddly enough that comes back to exercising, because it really does make me feel better about myself and the world around me. So I'll give it a shot. Then put some serious effort into being a grown up and getting my house into some sort of routine so that the house work isn't a constant thought. That would be great. And as for the school work, well I'm going to just have to get over it and do it. I really do want to do it and do well, so I'm going to have to put effort into that. Can't accomplish anything if you don't try. I can do it. This little spurt has helped oddly enough. Kind of put things into perspective. I can do it. I'm going to try to be more positive. I can do that. Why not. Why be negative. People probably hate hanging out with me or talking to me because I'm such a downer and all I do is complain. I know that I complain about people like that so I'm going to work on that. A little self improvement never killed anyone. I don't think anyway.

Ok. I'm going for a walk. And turning on a show for the baby to watch. She likes that in the afternoon.

ciao

thanks for the talk
me

A New Year

2009-01-05T21:36:00.002-07:00

I wonder why after January 1st it seems that the 'New Year' makes me feel new beginnings are needed. I need to begin to do things I didn't previously do, or start things I always wanted to do. Finish things I have started and haven't gotten around to doing. But change is definetly the name of the game. It's funny. And every January I think of change and how I need it. Although with me, I think of this often, not just in January, but it seems stronger in January. If any one has any suggestions that might actually work I'm all ears by the way. Because I have yet to actually make any of these changes I speak of permanently. I might try for a very short time, but they never stick, and then I beat myself up because my latest plan didn't work and I can't make anything work, blah blah blah.. I'm sure we've all seen the commercial, "I can't get a job because I don't have any experiance, I have no experiance because I can't get a job, I can't get a job because..." you get the idea or you remember the commercial.. Seems funny how many things in life fall in this same circle.

I just had a really great visit with my cousin, I enjoy when they come to visit. I see how different we are, and how simaler, seems funny... don't ask me why I just put that, but it seemed relevant...

Jason and I bought a treadmill, yep, jump right on the new year resolutioner band wagon, not really we've been talking about it for a long time, just finally got one.. it's great.. I like it... tried it out today already... got a steal of a deal so that is why we bought it. We have an eliptical already, but jason hates it, so we decided to get something he might actually use.. weird thought hey?? I'm still hoping to make a habbit of going to the gym again.. I really did feel so much better when I was getting in shape.. so yeah, gonna work on that..

well jay's home and I haven't seem him all day, well that's not true, he came home for a few minutes after he worked at the flip house after work and before he went to the bar for drinks and wings with his dad and brothers.. so I'm gonna run now,
ciao,
me

help...

2008-11-26T10:39:00.002-07:00

help she says in a sad pathetic way. I just can't do it all, and I'm not sure even where to start. Any ideas? between housework, and baby care, and the new baby causing me grief already (in the form of not being able to take medication for sicknesses and making me sick (just queazy) i'm done.. and then add school work and worries about everything else, and christmas on top of that.. oh gosh.. I just don't know if I can do it... I sound pathetic.. but I really want to go back to the days when I was a kid and I just had to worry about which friends I was or wasn't talking to, cleaning my room and minimal school work.. gosh.. I hope no one reads this, I just needed to get it out of my system.. It'd be even better if I saw a solution somewhere in there, but I don't see one of those any time soon... this is probably the cold talking.. yep.. a really really bad cough that kept me up most of last night and so I'm kinda sleep deprived and really sick, and kinda sad... and very overwhelmed with everything.. so none of those are helping eachother..

ok.. I'm depressing even my already sad self.. signing off
me

Growing up Stinks!

2008-11-21T15:32:00.002-07:00

I've decided that I really don't like 'Growing up'. All the responsibilities, worries, concerns, things to think about, decisions to make. It was all so much easier even in High School when the hardest thing you had to decide was what you wanted to do later... Dreaming of possibilities and where you're life was going to go. It feels like now, I can still 'dream' about where my life is going to go, but then when the reality hits, things are sadly disappointing. Things seems to tell me where I'm going not the other way around. Between money and obligations, and then attempting to get to where I want to go, everything is in such a state of 'Hurry up and wait' that nothing ever actually gets done. Then I get distracted, which causes me to procrastinate which causes things to not get done, so the build up, then the next thing I know I'm so burried in things I 'have' to do that I can't get my head above water so I get overwhelmed, and then end up doing nothing because my brain goes on the defensive and simply shuts itself off.

Budgets suck, money sucks, bills suck, dreams you can't reach suck, wanting things sucks, for-ever waiting sucks.. and that's the most times I've used suck in one sentence. And then I sit here on this blog and I'm not doing my school work which I'm already behind on which sucks... Seriously, when am I going to get a break. Tomorrow is my birthday, and I should have worked really hard all week so that I could do something fun for the weekend and not worry about stuff, but no.. did I do that, no, I slacked and procrastinated, and put things off until the point where I'm thinking of all the things I want to do tomorrow, combined with all the things I should do tomorrow and I'm wondering when the hell it's all gonna fit.. and when the hell I'm just going to catch on and get this crap done so that I can just live... not for ever waiting.. just living... grr...... how do I get myself in these messes.. am I too ambitious but lacking in motivation and follow through. Do I need to set my sights lower so that maybe I could actually achieve something? Do I need to seriously look at things, and what's really important and weed some things off my 'To do' list? Do I need to stop thinking/talking about/whining about/ and pondering everything that needs to be done and stop coming up with theories of how to do it and actually just do it.. ??? there's a novel concept!!! just doing something when you first think about it as opposed to not??? Not to smart am I?? I just see all the things other people are accomplishing and wonder if I'm ever going to make it??? It sure doesn't seem this way.. And another thing.. I really need to stop comparing myself to other people.. that's just a bad idea.. I need to just do my thing and compare myself to me.. and let myself get somewhere and celebrate the little accomplishments and give myself a break every now and then.. (as in not be so hard on myself not as in do less, because lately if I did any less I'd have to stop completely because I'm not doing too much to begin with... Yikes..

ok.. I'm going to have to sign off and at least try to finish this dumb math lesson that I've been saying I was going to finish all week and haven't..

TTYL,
me

well that was a long time

2008-10-28T22:25:00.003-06:00

So here I am thinking how rude it is that other people haven't updated their blogs so that I have something to read on that once in a life time night that I'm awake at 10:30 and not doing something else already. What do I discover? I haven't made an entry in nearly 2 months, so I'm not really any better. Opps.

Well then, what to talk about? I think it's safe to put up here that I have exciting news... There will be a new little Jr Coles in the house in May. Yep, mid may, Joie and Jason will be parents for the second and last time. I know some are saying never say never, but seriously, 2 is already pushing my kid tolerance, so there will not be a third... I will see to that. Either way, I'm excited. Nervous, still scared shitless, but excited none-the-less. I really can't believe it. I mean, it always seems like a good idea when you're just talking about it in theory, when it's simply a possibility in the future. But when it actually comes to fruition.. it's a little unnerving. I thought it would be easier the second time, on my nerves that is, but nope, no different, all the same fears and worries and all those fun things. So far it's been pretty easy, much like my first. A little nausea (wow what a difficult word to spell) but I've got that good old dyclectin drug that the dr's prescribe for pregnant women, so it's all good.. well not ALL good, but getting there. It should be soon.

Hailey's in dance lessons. It's kinda a waste of my time and money, but hopefully she enjoys it. I know right now it's seriously just a test of my patience. But I'm not failing yet, close, but not totally.

I'm still in school... it's going.. slowly.. I am still working on it which is great, but it's just getting harder and harder to focus. I hope I can still do well. I'm planning a busy spring, English diploma in April, baby in May and Math diploma in June. Should be great! yikes! not really excited about that part, but there is simply no other way that it is going to work. So cross your fingers and wish me luck. So far I have a 89% in english and a 92% in math. I'm doing better in math then I had imagined, and actually in english, I'm still pretty proud of myself. It's seeming like it's been too easy thus far, so I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Right now I'm reading the Sword of truth series. Lindsay got me started on them in the summer. What a bad idea that was. There are 12 books, they're all really thick and I really like them so I have to read them quickly.. Which takes away from my studies and other such responsibilities.

Our annual Halloween bash is coming up quickly, and as per usual, I'm completely un-prepared.. one of these years, I'm actually going to do a good job of planning it, start a long time in advance, really put an effort into it.. it will be amazing!!! Some day, you just wait and see.

Things around the house couldn't be busier. Jason has decided the basement is his pet project of the minute. He is actually doing pretty well. Things aren't going as fast as they probably could, but they are going pretty quick in terms of how fast jason goes. (my fireplace still has no grout on the tiles and he started that in June). I hope he'll have it all completed by christmas, then after that, we can focus on a nursery, changing hailey's room into a 'big girl' room, finishing a few thousand projects going on around here. It would be nice.. I'm sure it won't last though, I'm sure sooner then later, he'll just want to start getting the garage going or something else equally great. Someday, all this is going to be finished, I'll be happy, our house will be amazing, and he'll be bored. Such is life, he'll find other hobbies to fill his time with... I hope!

Well I need to go to bed, a busy day of shopping, costume making, dog grooming, and home work ahead of me.. sounds tiring already.. I can't handle this whole new state I'm in.. my body is forcing me to slow down and it's driving me mad!!!

ok.. really need to get some sleep... 10:40 is way past my bed time.. at least it will be by the time I do all the nightly rituals and actually get to bed.. oh, and making my bed, because I just washed all my sheets, and I haven't done that yet...

grrr...

ciao for now my loyal readers...

me

I just don't friggin' get it...

2008-09-02T20:02:00.002-06:00

Man, I suck at math... every time I think I've figure something out, I check my answers, and I'm totally out in left field.. I don't understand.. I'm going to have to get a tutor or I'm never going to pass this class.. I can't believe it... I just can't get any of it right..

There's a lot going on in my head and life right now. To start major changes it seems. Mom and Dad moving to the foaley road house, yep, sleeping there tonight. No more walking to their house, no more hailey walking over there, no more any of that.. Nicole has gone back to work. No more going to the gym together, no more calling her 80 times a day because I just need to talk to someone. No more lunch dates and running errands together. D. None of the above. School is here, totally hard, taking a lot more time then I seemed to figure I'd need. I'm behind already and it's only week 3, which is bad. I'm totally sucking at math, just don't get it at all and it's only the first friggin' unit! oh god!!!! Talk about discouraging.

Haven't been eating well, haven't been exercising regularly. Haven't been able to keep up with hailey, the house work and the school work, so because the school work is a priority and hailey doesn't take no for an answer the priorities are not looking well on house work.. there fore the house is a disaster and that stresses me out more. I'm trying to not let it get to me, but it just is... ugh... got lots done this weekend, except that it was all new stuff, nothing that was already bothering me.. I guess except for the shed, got the shed done (except for paint) that was previously on the list. The basement is framed. This is a new project. We were just going to build some shelves so that we could put my dad's records down there. The next thing I know we're framing walls and we're finishing off the whole basement. More stress.. means I have to draw up the basement so that I can go get permits for everything, have to deal with all that, and the pool table is going to be here on the 10th. Yikes..

just a lot going on right now. Maybe Heather will draw up my basement for me.. That would help.. I'll give her a jingle and see if that would be ok...

well hailey wants me to read her a story, so I'm going to go. no more home work tonight and no more computer..

ciao for now,
me

Ah, Lindsay is beating me...

2008-07-16T23:01:00.002-06:00

Well that's what she says anyways.. what does she know.. *giggles* well now I'll be a head with the newest blog posting.. but I think she's still one up on me.. we'll see.. she's bound to falter eventually.. unless she's getting competitive then it's on.. and I better bring my A game...

Well, went fly fishing today. It was my birthday present from my parents. A one day private fly lesson with Linda Mclennan. (I hope that's how you spell her name) if you even kinda like fly fishing.. I totally recommend to take a lesson like that.. it was amazing.. she shows you everything, explains about the different kinda flies, and the different ways to cast, and shows you and provides lunch and took us out for coffees after, and just everything about the day was amazing.. had a ton of fun.. got to try something called a double hall.. it's neat.. just learned it.. apparently I'm pretty good. At least that's what the teacher said.. she was impressed, said I was a natural... I like it. I'm going to 'borrow' one of dad's fishing rods until I get my own much better one, which might be for my birthday or christmas or something, because dad loves fishing and can remember to get that for me.. we'll see.. he said if he sells both of his houses he'll buy me a pink rod and reel.. that would be funny.. we'll see...

hmm.. what else.. went camping this past weekend at Carseland camp ground.. it's about 40 minutes away from my house.. it's beautiful.. I really liked it.. it's nice, it's close, it's on the river, it was just great... totally going back there sometime.. and it's really big, so that was a bonus... had a lot of fun, mom and dad, and shawn and nicole showed up on the saturday, we went fishing, tried to show nicole the basics of fly fishing, I guess i could be a better teacher now that I've had a lesson...

Well, I've been unemployed officially for two weeks now.. kinda sad, but well, I've been crazy busy the entire time.. so not sure what I'm doing wrong..

decided I'm going to go on EI, I payed into it this whole time why not collect it... If I do have another kid, I won't be able to collect maternity leave because I won't be really working... so why not get some money now???

also, well here's a shocker, I think I might go back to school.. yeah.. so the other half of my brain, who I'm so much alike it's scary most times, is going to be a teacher, she really loves the idea of it, and I think she'll be really great at it.. and what does this have to do with me you ask, well I've been searching out possibilities lately to see what I want to be when I grow up, and well... I think I'm leaning more towards teaching.. right now I'm thinking high school science or english.. not sure which, but well maybe more english.. I really do like writing, just incase you couldn't tell.. crazy thought I know..

holy crud, it's 11:30.. gonna be an early day tomorrow, I'm gonna be tired.. going fishing on the Old man river tomorrow with my dad, it's gonna be painful to get up, dressed, ready, out the door and to his house by 7.. eww... oh the agony! oh well.. I'll sleep good tomorrow night, as the hoover family fun night is tomorrow too.. yikes.. well I can sleep in on saturday.. sounds good..

so yeah.. thinking of teaching.. crazy.. we'll see.. I'll keep you posted.. I feel like Greg, my brother in law... it seems to be the flavor of the week with me.. I change my mind all the time.. this one really does seem like a great idea though.. we'll see..

well I'm gonna go chat on msn with a drunken lonely shane for a bit, then I'm going to bed.. gotta get up early you know..

ciao,

me

I just can't

2008-06-26T20:41:00.002-06:00

Can't seem to do anything these past few days. I think my brain and body have gone from one extreme to the next. A couple of weeks ago it was all rushing all the time. Always on the go, always something to do, and if not doing then thinking of doing and everything has just shut down. I'm tired all the time, I'm slow moving at everything, I'm just slow.. yes you heard it from me folks, I'm slow. I can't make myself do anything. Last week I was still plugging away, trying to get some exercising in and gardening and stuff, but I'm just freaking slow this week, not even trying to do anything. I don't care about exercising, I don't care what I eat, I'm tired, I'm blah.. I'm terrible..

I don't even have ideas. I'm excited because we bought a new 'holiday trailer' on the weekend which we get next friday, and I'm excited because we booked a holiday to Great Falls Montana, which is cool. It's at one of those KOA campgrounds. I don't know if anyone but me noticed them.. there's one in calgary, right by COP well maybe not in Calgary, but I think it's right on the edge. Anyway, the one in Great Falls sounds really great, and we can go on week long vacation to there for the same price that it would cost to go to Vegas for a few days.. so that's cool.. and I'm really excited about that.

I should have all the time in the world on my hands, and I just have nothing.. no energy, no drive, no motivation, no will power, no idea, nothing to give, nothing needed... no nothing.. how retarded..

it's like I've got being blah down to an art... art.. I would like to try that some time.. scrap booking, music playing, writing, my own webpage, CSS, fly tying, the list goes on and on.. if only I could keep my eyes open and myself organized.. oh.. I'd have to get organized to stay that way.. *giggles* not likely..

ok.. can't even get myself interested in writing here.. who woulda thunk it after the last blog entry..

runnin..

me

2nd in a day Again!!!

2008-06-10T23:33:00.003-06:00

Danny's glasses on a rock that Chris pulled out of a hole we were drilling for a customer

Whoa.. crazy how I can go for weeks with out putting anything on here and be more then content.. but today.. well I have to write again.. it's just in me.. 11:30 at night.. just watched Becoming Jane, loved it, and tried to talk to jason, but he slept through most of the movie so you can imagine what he's like for convorsation after the fact... well so I wanted to talk.. and no one's on MSN so I figured I'd babble to myself.. but put it out there incase anyone else was listening....

So I just clued in... just to do things because you're happy. I have to watch what I put up here I guess, because who knows who actually even reads these things, but there is a situation in my life right now that perhaps doesn't seem like the logical choice to me.. well it didn't seem like the logical choice, now.. I'm like.. hey.. if it makes you happy.. it makes me happy.. everything is that way... Why do what other people expect of you because it's 'right' or 'smart' or 'makes the most sense'?? Because aren't all of those things really in the eyes of the beholder? Seriously? Just because I think it's right (or all those other words) doesn't mean that you do, or some one else does.. but if it makes me happy, or you happy.. who gives two hoots... I'm going to try to live by that... I'm a pretty judgemental person... I try not to be and I frown on it when other people are of me, but I am. I am human, quick to judge, quick to 'make up my mind' about a situation, no matter how much I feel I'm open minded. Which is bad. I shouldn't be that way. I shouldn't judge anyone else, I hate it when people do that to me. I shouldn't gossip and stuff.. and I'm not sure that I can not do any of those things, but I'm really going to try. I'm going to attempt to be a more positive person. Why not? What have I got to lose? Grief, stress, anger, getting myself all worked up over stupid things? Yeah.. sounds dumb even now... so lets work on that.. I'm going to. I'm going to do things because it makes me happy. Now, this isn't always the instant meaning. For instance, I would like it if my company was successful. That wold make me happy. Well in order for it to be successful there are steps and sacrifices I need to make. Those steps might not always make me happy, but the end result will, and that's worth it. I'm going to exercise and eat better, not because individually either of those makes me happy (ok, exercise really does, but I love food too much, it's my downfall) but because in the end, I'd rather be one of those mom's to Hailey who goes roller blading, and playing in fields, and hiking, and not afraid of anything because I might not make it.. I'm determined.. I survived my first night of boot camp tonight.. I didn't enlist in the army, I just signed up for a class at FLC, but it was good. I'm gonna hurt tomorrow, which will make my day that much more interesting because I have a lot of work stuff I want to accomplish, and I have to paint my back hall, one more coat, and I have dodgeball.. and it will all get done.. because the end result will make me happy..

on a side note right now, it's freaking pouring out.. I mean terrential down pour, and my neighbor just got home.. in his big noisy diesel truck, and here comes a cab.. whoa.. busy street at 11:45 on a tuesday night... oh well.. I htink the neighbor is smoking.. cuz he's just sitting there in his truck.. weird... mind you he probably thinks I'm a freak because I'm all bundled up sitting outside on my porch watching it rain and typing on my lap top... hahahhahahah.. eww.. you can smell cigarettes even through the rain.. disgusting.. who would want to do that..

and on that note.. something else to comment on.. I'm constantly telling my dad and brother and anyone else I know that smokes that the best way to get rid of the smell, or feel better or to make the coughing go away is to stop smoking.... like every time anything happens I say I have a cure for you.. stop smoking.. and I never really thought anything of it because I'm just stating the obvious and I don't like smoking and they already know it so why not say it.. well in regards to my dog, he's a pain in the ass. He really is, I really could train him a lot better, again if I had the time.. (better find some of that illucid stuff) anyways, he drives me crazy when he pees in the house and I have to clean it, or when he barks like a maniac at nothing at all, and my dad and my cousin are always telling me.. I have a cure for that... get rid of the dog... it bugs me.. and I just put it together this weekend that that is how I come across... and how much it must bug them, because the smoking issue comes up a lot more then the dog one... so it must be a right pain in the ass.. so I'll try to stop that too...

always the golden rule hey? Treat others as you want to be treated.. and it always seems to go full circle.. the people you're nice to are nice to you, and the one's you aren't aren't... it only makes sense... I'm not saying by any means that I'm going to be a whole different person or anything, just that there are parts of me I'd like to improve upon and the best way to do that is to figure out what they are and make some goals.. so that's what I'm doing..

man I really could just write my thoughts down forever.. I pitty the fool who actually reads this..

and if anyone actually does make it this far.. drop me a note.. I'd be interested in knowing who you are..

man.. the rain is getting harder... really harder.. I can't believe all the stinkin rain.. although I did get new 'front porch' furniture yesterday, so it's really comfy, and great to sit on and watch it rain, or just listen to the crazy amounts of rain while I type on here.. whoa.. picked up again.. we're gonna get flooded out at this rate.. wonder how much it's rained here lately.. too much.. but I wonder the actual amount. Last week Jason and I had a bowl on the back table that got left out there, and it was full by the end of sunday, so that is a lot of rain, but I imagine it already would have filled itself back up again just from the rain today.. yuck... my poor garden can't even grow because there's no sun light.. yesterday when it was sunny.. everything started sprouting.. I wonder what will survive all this rain.. yuck.. supposed to be 2 more days of this...

wow.. talking on here is a lot like talking to jason, satisfying at first, but I end up craving someone talking back... why aren't any of you on msn right now.. although that's too slow..I need real life interaction.. I wonder if jason knows what he does to me.. queen chatter box... when he goes to sleep early.. drives me bonkers...

ok.. gonna go look at other peoples blogs and facebook status' and see what there is to find out there..
ciao..

me

Whoops...

2008-06-10T09:00:00.002-06:00

Just harassed lindsay for not publishing for too long, and look it's been a while for me too.. but longer for her... either way..

Hey!

Just surfing some blogs.. checking in on the goings on of people I know.. interesting stuff.. I love reading what's going on to other people.. living vicariously through them I guess...

Well, I'm in Calgary, and it's raining... again.. has been for ever I think.. getting a bit tired of the rain.. wish it would be nice already.. my garden would do amazing if it ever just saw the sun for a few hours.. yesterday it was sunny most of the day, and my radishes grew like mad, you could practically watch them grow.. crazy.. wish that the rest would stand a chance....

not much going on here.. because of the rain, work is slow, Need to get more work because we're running out and need stuff to do, and gotta get our web page up and running because I think that might help. Maybe today I could get that going.. At least something.. some pictures and content.. I'm sure I must have some....

It's hard and stressful running a whole company.. just wish I was better at it... feeling really blah today.. probably this stinkin' weather. I signed up for a bootcamp... twice a week for 3 weeks.. starting today.. pretty excited about that actually... hope it's fun... and I don't die... Hailey's birthday party is this weekend.. yeah.. she's 2.. can you believe it?? I can't.. can't even decide what to get her...

yikes.. told michelle that I'd try to make it to her spa party.. guess I won't be making that..

ok.. let her know about that.. and got some breakfast in me... just not sure what to do right now.. I wish it was sunny.. seems dumb, because then I'd be stuck in the house while it's nice outside, but I do miss the sun a bit...

well I guess I'll just have to get a lot done today and tomorrow so that thursday and friday when things are nicer outside I can go out there and take care of stuff.. I can do it.. just have to put my mind to it..

ok.. I'm on it..

what else do I have to do today? Oh well a million things..

well I would like to report that the last three nights in a row I cooked at home and recipies that I have from different books.. it was great.. mmmm.. all of it's been so good... might try to keep that up...

ok.. I have to go make my company sucessful.. wish me luck..

me

So nice...

2008-05-22T23:29:00.002-06:00

I am sitting outside right now (which is actually pretty cold considering I'm wearing shorts, it's been cloudy and raining all day and I'm just wrapped up in a mexican blanket at at 11:30 at night...) but you know what.. it's great.. I love the sounds, the smell... I just finished catching up with some of my favorite blogs.. and I watched National Treasure 2 tonight...

So what's new in my world you ask? Or you didn't, but either way, I'm going to tell you...

I've spent way to much on Wii games and such items in the last little while, but I love it all, so I don't care... I got guitar hero and two guitars, I got mario kart and now I have 4 steering wheels so when people come over to play, we can... I have Wii Fit, and some crazy skiing game.. it's really fun... and it actually keeps track of how fit you are.. crazy.. but I love it...

Work is going really well, things are all working out the way I had hoped, well thus far anyway. We're wrapping up our first job that I sold with my flyers, and we start the next one on monday (well it will probably be wednesday or thursday if this rain doesn't stop, but either way.. YAY us!!! The boys are doing great, they really are amazing.. they always pull through when you need them.. My dad is really hard on them, but I think he's just bi-polar.. seriously.. he's crazy sometimes.. and people wonder why I am the way I am.. love him to pieces, but did I really have to take after him quite so much??? yikes.. there's a scary thought. But I will give him this, he got mad at me today (I was going to say once, but I think it was more then that) and yesterday, and both times, he phoned and apologized.. that doesn't happen very often, so I thank him.. it made me feel really good... and in turn, didn't screw up my day completely...

I found Hailey some really very cute clothes... oh, to be a kid and get a new wardrobe everytime the season changes.. I'm envious... *pause to warm up my fingers*

we went camping this past weekend.. it was amazing.. so much fun.. did a ton of stuff and met some really great people...

ok.. sorry.. I have to write more later, I promised dean I would make him a website (about a month ago) and I haven't had the time or energy to do it.. now that I'm still awake..I think I'll go check out other sites and see what they look like and see if I can find some inspiration to get his up and running..

ciao.
me

Can it get any better??

2008-04-24T09:05:00.002-06:00

Ok if it wasn't snowing right now, the weather was warm and I was typing this outside on my front porch while drinking a cup of tea, it would be better. But other then that.. I don't know...

I sold my first real project Monday, well I think so anyway. I hope the guy wants to still go through with it. He hasn't responded yet, so we'll find out.

I got a central vac on tuesday, which is really exciting as well, because I miss my old one, and I'm not a big fan of my sad little canister vac... this might seem pretty sad, but if I got a programable thermostat and some more paint, my house would be great... ok.. it needs more then that, but that's all it would take for me right now....

Also, Jason bought me an orchid for valentines day 07, and normally I kill them off, but I have one and it's doing ok.. it wasn't growing very well,well the leaves on the bottom were, but no flowers, so I wasn't sure what I did to it.. well on the directions it said you were supposed to trim it back to 2" after all the flowers died... well I didn't want to kill it, so I didn't... after over a year of no change in the plant, not better not worse, I finally trimmed the end of the stem. Well, that was less then a week ago, and this morning I noticed that there is a new stem already sprouted and it's going to get flowers.. GO JO! So excited.. can't wait to tell Jason... I can't believe I did it.. YAY! and my hibiscus loves this new house and has been getting flowers as well..

So, I'm the captain of our dodgeball team. Yep, Hit 'N Run. We play wednesday nights at with the CSSC. So, we've never won. Well, Jason and I have only played one season before this, but our team played a season before that, so this is season 3. Well last night we found out we're on Div B instead of C which is bad, because we're not very good, but our first game last night, and we won!!! We really did! Go us! I can't believe it.. I'm so excited for us... it felt so good to have a victory, our spirits were better, we were all over it.. we were catching and playing well.. we could still improve, because I don't know how much the other team even knew about dodgeball, but that's ok.. can't win them all if you don't win the first game.. and we did.. so we're still in the running.. (yes probably overly optimistic.. but GO TEAM! none the less!) only one problem... my little pinky nail on my right hand nearly got ripped right off by a ricochetting ball, and now I have to have two bandaids on to keep it from catching on anything and it hurst like a son of a gun! but it's great none the less... And Cathy came to play.. and we just had so much fun.. I think she really had a good time.. and it was a good night to come.. such a confidence booster...

And I've got a good start on the Rockin' R&D website, I just have to get content in it.. should be great.. I'm really excited.. I'll post the link here as soon as it's done..

yeah.. so that's about it...

I've gotta go bye

My Thoughts Right Now

2008-04-22T22:43:00.002-06:00

Well, it's been a little while since I was last on here. I thought about writing on here a couple of times because good things happened, and I specifically thought that I should blog about it so that people don't think I'm a total B**ch all the time... For instance, about a week ago, I was cleaning the rabbit cage so I let the bunny run around the upstairs hallway. It's quite big for those of you who haven't been to my house, so he had a lot of room to play, instead of being locked up in that cage of his all the time. So anyway, the dog decided the bunny needed kisses and kept licking him, so I made him sit on the stairs with Hailey and I. Hailey sat there oh so well and watched the bunny. She liked saying 'Hop Hop' as I explained to her that the bunny was hopping all over the place. Then the bunny decided he needed to clean the dog slobber off of himself so he sat down and did what bunny's do, licked his little paws and rubbed them on his head. Well Hailey thought this was a great idea, so she too, sat down (right in front of the bunny) grabbed her foot, licked it and rubbed it on her head.. it was the cutest thing I ever saw... I laughed so hard I had tears in my eyes... Oh the funny things she does.. totally the highlight of my day. I'm constantly amazed by her, and how much I love her, and how I can't find an imperfection in her. I know I'm completely biased because she's mine, but that's how I feel, and I thought I'd share that.

Other things have gone well, and not so well. Work is... well it's going. A lot is happening for me right now, where as the rest of the company is kind of in limbo. We're all working to find more work, and it's slowly coming in. I sold a great deck yesterday. I'm very excited to start the project. I was excited when the guy asked us to come take a look, hear his ideas, and tell him what we thought. His ideas were great and I could help but get swept up in them and try to make them a reality...

I have a lot to think about right now. Where as, this company isn't actually mine, it's my dads. He says it's my company, but it's not... he still has the final say in what happens. But I usually have a lot of sway as to what those possibilities are. A really good family friend came over today to drop some stuff off and we had a great talk. I learned a lot of stuff from her in our lengthy but still rather short talk. (if that makes any sense, it does in my head, and that's all that matters) She just explained to me that I can't be super woman. I have to hire out different things, I have to get help. Everything she said made sense, but at the same time, there is only so much we can do with the funds that we have, so comprimises will have to be made, and mostly on my part. I just have such high hopes and expectations for this company, that I need to work hard to see that it becomes a reality. Hence the reason I'm still here trying to put my thoughts into 'type' writing so that I can wind down and get some sleep before it's tomorrow morning and I have to start all over again. I'm just pretty pumped right now and the vortex is spinning at full speed.

So yeah. I started working on my website. I think it's going to look great. I'll post up my picture up here... and a picture of my desk as it was when I started writing this.. just a little picture that I felt would look good at the top of this..

hmm.. I have so much to say tonight, but honestly, I'm getting very tired, and it's 11pm, and I'd like to get some frozen yogurt, or maybe just a water, and go watch an episode of Alias, and then go to sleep. I'm sure Jason's already sleeping on the couch, because I'm pretty sure his hockey team just lost the first round of the play offs, and he was pretty tired to begin with.

Ok.. well enough rambling.. have to put some pictures in here and then off to bed for me..

ciao for now my friends,

me

whoa.. two posts in one day

2008-04-03T23:09:00.002-06:00

that's gotta be a record for me.. I'm just kinda sleepy, but can't sleep... too much going on in my brain, normally an episode of alias will take my mind off everything and I'll just go to sleep, but tonight.. even two episodes didn't work.. so alas, here I am.. blogging for your reading pleasure...

So what am I thinking about at this funny hour.. (remember am now part of an 'old married couple' 11 is late for me.. ) well work, mostly... about getting bonded (not in the kinky way, in the so people will hire us because they don't feel we'll rip them off way)... about the call I have to go to tomorrow to do a quote for a lady about her basement... about the other one that some guy wants me to do 'next saturday' of which i'm not sure when next saturday is... I have to email him back and figure that out.. about the list of things centrex needs from me by tomorrow at noon.. and whether I'll do it by tomorrow at noon (meaning I'm getting up really early to try to put it together before i go to the quote at 9 am.. or whether I'll send them an email and explain that I haven't done it not because I'm trying to rip them off, I genuinely forgot about it after I saw it a few months ago and just didn't get to it, but will get to it by tuesday at the latest. How I can't believe it's friday tomorrow already, and this is the first time in my life that i honestly wish tomorrow were wednesday so that I'd still have a couple of days to get more work done before the weekend, because this week went by really really stinking fast... and it all started with flyer delivery in Mckenzie towne... well who knew that this would be such a hotbed of activity.... yes.. the fence makes 3 calls from 50 flyers.. a useless statistic is that I delivered 30 flyers in fairview and nothing (although we do have to quote a kitchen on monday for a lady, and she is on the street I delivered to, but she talked to randy, she didn't see our flyer...) anyway, and 50 flyers to auburn bay and I didn't get anything from either of those, but I got 3 out of 50 from mckenzie towne... which if just one of those guys hires us to do work, pays for my flyers... which is great.... so I hope we get something out of this deal.. but I understand that you don't get every job that you quote, but at least a couple of these would be great!!! I'd be so excited.. and now the boys are going to help me deliver flyers on saturday so that will help alot, I'm going to hit mckenzie towne, cranston, new brighton, bridlewood, silverado and sundance... yes.. because reno's would be good too, not just new construction.. so I'll hit up sundance... that sounds like a great idea... so that's what we'll do.. 50 flyers in each.. and then maybe in two weeks, we'll deliver more.. danny will be in mexico, and I'll need stuff to keep chris busy, so that's what I'll do, I'll get him to help me deliver flyers and do quotes and stuff.. sounds great...

things are going to go well, I just have to get it off the ground, and there's more to running your own company then I ever thought possible.. and I really want it to succeed so I'm trying really hard.. which is crazy, it's not actually my company why do I care, but it is kinda my company, and I do really care.. I really want it to do well, so we all do well, I want to be as professional as I can, no hack jobs anywhere, just all by the book, as it should be done.. signs on lawns we're working on.. the whole shebang... yes sir I want to do it all, maybe someday we can have a real office and an actual secretary, and do much much bigger jobs, where we'll need 100 000 dollar bonds because the projects are so big.. yes.. I'm dreaming big.. never thought this is the way my life would go.. but you know what.. I'm kinda liking it.. makes me feel important.. makes me feel like I'm building something great here.. I know we're only reno's.. but we have to start somewhere.. has to get off the ground first... I think we're on our way, and if we work well, and we're honest with the customers, then everything will work out fine.. they will love us and recommend us to their friends and neighbours, and all will be great!!!

wow how I can get carried away...

wow how I can ramble on for ever, and you poor shmucks are stuck with this twice today.. well I'm sure there isn't anyone reading this, but I feel sorry for the folks that do, because it's pretty boring and pretty long winded..

I really should go to bed.. but I'm still wide awake and thinking.. which is retarded.. but oh well.. what can you do.. maybe I'll take my book to bed and see if that doesn't help.. normally it does the trick.. although artimis fowl hasn't been doing it for me lately.. just have to finish that book so I can move on to something else, like the dan brown book I'm reading as well that also isn't doing it for me.. oh the neighbours are drunks... some cab just went by.. meaning someone came home intoxicated... well it might not, but it's much more fun to think of then they just needed a ride home...

well I guess I should go so that you don't have to read any more of my rambling.. but I just feel like I need to type.. and just keep going and put down what ever my fingers feel like typing.... when I was in jr high there was this guy Danny Ng, and he could type so fast, I couldn't believe it.. at the time it was 120 wpm I think... well I don't think I go that fast, but I think I'm right up there.. I should find a way to figure out how fast I do type, but when it really counts, my typing slows down considerably.. but the girls at sovereign used to laugh at how fast I typed.. and especially when it was for personal emails.. because it would speed up because I was just typing what I thought and not what I had too.. so there is my stupid story for the night and now I'm going to bed because I'm hitting the delete key more then the rest of them.. so that means I have to give my fingers a rest.. night..

me

50 Million things

2008-04-03T09:09:00.002-06:00

50 Million things to do, and I find myself sitting in front of this computer once again. Checking friends status changes on Facebook, and checking to see if anyone updated their blogs recently. And as I sit here thinking 'Jeeze, nothing new on the blog front' I am switching back and forth to my own blog that I haven't written anything on in a while, and I think, 'wow, they're probably thinking the same thing of me.' Too funny, so here's some tiny little bit of reading that you can do when you're checking for things..

Things are busy here.. I'm actually trying to convince myself that I can get it all done, and wondering how I'm going to pull that off. It's days like this that I'm thankful that Hailey sleeps everywhere and 10 minutes in the middle of the day can be sufficient if I need it to be... how handy... The things I'd like to accomplish today are as follows: laundry (actually all washed/dried and put away) cleaning my bedroom (it's not really terrible, but it's been the same not terrible way for a long time and I'd like it to be clean), cleaning the rest of the house (this includes dusting, what a tedious task) oh, cleaning the bunny cage and cutting his nails, because he needs it..., finish the 5 prints that I have to look at for centrex so they're just done and out of the way (I say this every day and never do it..), deliver more flyers to Elgin and then New Brighton, and possibly Silverado (I think we could get a lot of work from there), go see Terry about the Varsity house and what changes are being made, go to home depot and price things out so I can get a quote ready for tomorrow, go to the gym and do something... I told Nicole we should do this one class, but she hasn't called me, so not sure, might just do the ole' flyer delivery for exercise today to save some time.. and I also have a bunch of other little things that I have to get done just because.. and give hailey a bath, and play with her and make a good supper for tonight... hmm.. oh, actually I was going to tell Jason that we should go to his parents for supper, so that takes care of that... yeesh... a lot.. and I really honestly wish I could get it all done, because then I could stop thinking about it.. I could just have it done... but instead I will sit on this internet, then I'll probably go to the gym class, go to varsity, go to home depot, deliver some flyers and then come home and sit on the couch till jason gets home when I'll finally get up and get showered and ready and then go to his parents house for the evening... yeah.. not a lot off the list will get done.. and that's how it always is, and that frustrates me, but I honestly don't know how to break the cycle...

gotta figure something out.. better try to get it done.. which means I have to get off this computer.. that's the hardest part.. what a time waster.. just could sit here for hours checking out things happening to other people.. ok.. since this was the the worlds most boring blog.. I'll sign off for now and continue later.. when I have something exciting to talk about..

ciao, me

blah...

2008-03-18T09:01:00.002-06:00

not sure what to put here... not sure what I'm feeling.. not sure about much of anything...

worried about my weight, but I can't seem to motivate myself to exercise, so I worry that I'm not exercising.. and that makes it worse, can't seem to do anything about my eating, mostly because I don't want to. I really don't eat that bad, I just need to tweek it a bit... oh to be care free like the little girl sitting beside me at this breakfast table.. singing and clapping her hands, tapping her knees, giving me that tilted head look that says, don't you know what I mean mom.. it's so easy....

I think, as odd as this sounds, I need a break from it all.. Work is crazy busy right now, and maybe I just need to focus on that for a little bit and stop feeling so guilty about the exercise thing... maybe just do it if I feel like it, and not worry about it if I don't. Nicole has some stuff that she found that is good in theory.. but it just doesn't sit right with me... it seems.. unrealistic.. so I'm not sure.. and it seems to take too much thought.. which is funny, because the one is 'effortless training' and I"m already putting too much effort into it..

well how about this.. this week.. I'll just focus on work, I'm not going to worry about the gym unless I feel like going.. I'm just going to stop thinking about it all together.. and the food thing.. just going to ignore it.. that seems to be when I do my best at this whole weight loss/ fitness thing.. when I'm not thinking about it.. I'm just doing it... naturally.. that sounds better..

ok.. sounds good..

well back to my weekend..

Crystal and Darcy came to visit.. and that was great.. we had a really good time.. we went to the science centre to see 'Bob the Builder' and Hailey had a great time.. I'm a terrible mom though, I didn't take my camera to take pictures of her.. and it's too expensive to go there to make much of a habbit out of it... Crystal and I did a little shopping, which was nice.. there was a lot of stuff I wanted to get, but I didn't.. I actually kinda behaved myself... Saturday night we played Super Monkey Balls till the wee hours of the morning... on the Wii.. it was halarious.. it's been a while since I just wanted to play video games like that... we had a good time... I really like video games, kinda wish I had more time and energy to play them...

ok.. have to work.. and visit with nicole.. and go play video games.. because that was our plan..

ciao till later..

Too funny...

2008-02-22T15:04:00.002-07:00

So I'm completely harrassing Lindsay about her quite not so happy blog postings.. but then she points out that mine aren't exactly pleasent reading either... and I laughed.. I know.. they aren't really are they..

As we discussed and I will now discuss with you, is, well my blog is much like the back pages in my school note book were... just a place to put my thoughts down.. a place to vent with out actually venting on any one... it's great.. I can put what ever I want, and anyone can take it how ever they want. It works well for me anyways, and a time or two has actually solved problems with what ever I was having problems... I loved that... it worked out quite smoothly..

On a whole, my life is really quite good... I mean, I really shouldn't have anything to complain about.. I have a nice house, and a job that most of the time really is good, but it's like all the other news in the world, you really only hear about the bad stuff. I have a great husband who loves me more then words can say, and I know that, because he's still here after all the crap I continually put him through.. but I love him too... couldn't imagine my life with out him.. I have a beautiful, terribly intelligent daughter (not that I'm biased or anything...) who might not like me best when Jason's around, but when it's just me and her, I know that I'm her whole world, and she really does love me and need me... I love it.. Last night for instance, Jason was at a side job, and Hailey woke up from her afternoon nap, we sat on the couch totally cuddling and watched 'Cars' the movie.. it was amazing.. watched the whole thing... Wouldn't trade that for anything.. my favorite moments..

I have a really cute if not very intelligent dog.. who when he wants to be is quite smart.. but other then that.. he has his moments...

I have a great family who would do anything for me, and is always there for me, that I actually like spending time with.... well most of them, but even the ones that drive me crazy, have been really great lately, and making me think that I'm totally wrong about them.. maybe the just needed a chance... and I wasn't giving it to them.. don't get me wrong, we aren't going to be best friends over night, but you never know... things will be better I'm sure... which will be good for everyone involved... who needs bonus stress in their lives if you could avoid it...

I have the best friends.. I mean, my list of really great friends is perfect for me. I have people who truly care about me, who really do want to talk to me, and spend time with, and who take care in my life.. and I couldn't appreciate it more... I hope that everyone knows that... people that I call everyday and have to tell something the second it happens, probably more out of habbit then need, but it's nice none the less, and others who I can talk to once a week or even less, and just pick up like we never skipped a beat, a ton to talk about, stories to share and laughs to have... (although when have I ever had problems talking.. *giggles*) And I know I talk alot, I'm a self proclaimed chatter box.. can't help it.. It's in my gene's my mom and grandma and great grandma are all the same way.. I'm sure it goes back further then that, but those are the only one's I know... but I think that's why people like me.. because I talk.. because I can fill a silence like no other.. (ok so a lot of people talk alot but this is my yay me part.. so just bare with me.. ) I have people that seem more like aquaintences, but when we see eachother it's all laughs, and jokes and good times...and I love that too.. there just enough...

I have a lot of ambitions and dreams, and I have the ability to make them come true. I really could accomplish anything I put my mind too.. I used to think I couldn't, that (and I know I'm young still but again, bare with me..) that I was too old, that I didnt' know exactly what I wanted to do when I was fresh out of high school like it seemed so many people around me did, but even those who seemed to know what it was they wanted to do, some of them, they've faltered from the original plan and have adapted a new one. And that's great. Because my life certainly hasn't turned out according to plan.. nope.. I was supposed to be just finishing school right now, After highschool I was going to Europe for at least a year, seeing everything I could, and then I was going to come back and live in Res at some big shot university somewhere, a university and res like the ones you read about in books.. I was going to get some glamorous job, some high paying, highly respectable, difference making job, and then well after that, I hadn't thought about it after that.. But again, I wouldn't change the way things did turn out for that.. I think I can still do all that, I just didn't start there, it will be in the middle... I'm still going to see the world, and I'm going to have some fancy schmancy job some day.. just not sure what.. but I'll get it... as soon as I figure out what it is...

so yes... things are actually pretty good.. I want for nothing, and I have people around me that I love and who love me back.. and I am really the happiest I've ever been in my whole life. When I was in jr. high and high school I used to get so depressed because it seemed like I didn't have anyone who really wanted me around... I mean, they didn't mind 'hanging' out with me, but it didn't matter one way or another.. I was like the expendable crew member in Star Trek, the one that always gets killed off at the first sign of a bad guy or a potentially deadly situation... I'm sure it wasn't true, and maybe I pushed people away to purposly allow myself to feel like that, but it seemed like many a time, I'd call my grandma up in tears and she'd talk me through it and make me feel better if only temporarily... but look.. things all worked out great.. so go me... and thanks grandma...

So thanks everyone.. I really appreciate you.. everything does seem to happen for a reason, and just when I think things have totally gone to the shitter, they seem to pick themselves back up again, brush them selves off, and be greater then before... and that's great..

And another great thing about blogs (back to the topic at hand) is that I can ramble on about any ole' thing I want, for as long as I want to ramble, and you can either read about what I'm saying or not, and no one is there to tell me I talk to much, because any time some one says something, I always feel really self concious about it, and shut right up... and that is the key folks, the key to shutting me up, is to tell me I talk to much.. I'll catch on eventually if you use it all the time though...

ok.. this is Chatty Joie signing off... have a great one..

Something good for a change!!!

2008-02-14T17:40:00.002-07:00

Whoa.. what a day I've had... it's been amazing...

I started off the day doing my work and getting everything done by noon... go me.. then everything worked out really well for that which left me feeling pretty good...

Then I took my neon into Canadian tire to get the oil changed and the tires checked so that when the girl comes to look tonight it's in tip top shape... Well the trunk does open and it's missing a hub cap, but other then that.. this is an amazing car.. it's still in great shape, they say the brakes are great, the tires are good.. everything is good.. I'm quite exited.. I think it's a steal of a deal at $1800, but I'll give her money off for the trunk.. like $50 maybe.. we'll see..

next I went shopping with nicole, got all my valentines supper stuff, and bought jason a Love fern.. like from how to lose a guy in 10 days.. almost died.. laughed my head off the whole way home..

got home and I had left my work phone at home by accident, well the big wig from the company we build for had called and left a message for me to phone him.. so Im' all meak and timid and worried like normal.. well he starts on me that he has x number of houses with siders on them and no trim.. well I let him have it.. I was polite, I was truthful because I had all the facts from driving around last week and this week, and I was ferocious... I told him like it is.. and.. he agreed.. he thought his guys were getting out of hand.. we're not nearly as 'far behind' as they say we are, and just because there are siders on a house doesn't mean that we're slow workers, it means that they have nothing else to do and they're chomping at the bit all over the friggin place... I can't believe it.. I told my dad and he said to pat myself on the back because he thinks I just saved my company.. I think I did.. I felt liberated.. I feel so good.. better then I have in weeks, no stress, no worries, no anxiety, just great.. and it's valentines day.... and jason got me a yoga mat and a heart rate watch, so I'm totally excited about that too.. and I got him a love fern.. I was exited about it...

so now there is a girl that I think is french that is coming to look at the neon at 6:30 with her friend and I hope she buys it.. I'm totally psyched and I think it's going to go well because I just have a feeling.. I think it's going to go good because I'm having such an amazingly awesome day... and we're having fondue for supper, pizza fondue, normal oil fondue, and chocolate fondue.. and all the fixin's... can't wait... go me...

I just wanted to blog and let you guys know that sometimes I have really good days too, and I think it's going to be good for a while now, no more bad days.. YAY me!!!!!

I can't believe it... ok.. I really have to get going now, I have to shower and get ready for valentines day before those guys show up here so I can sell my car and have a romantic night..

loving it, lovin you.. thanks for reading..

coles out....

me

David and Goliath

2008-02-13T13:48:00.002-07:00

Who knew that the world right outside the window of my quiet suburban house could be so interesting....

As I type right now there is a Goliath of a moving truck attempting to maneuver the very narrow streets. Needless to say, he's stuck.. And has been stuck for nearly an hour now... And who ever said that Dodge Trucks weren't tough, I can honestly say I saw a 2500 Dodge super duty, tow a giant moving truck, backwards to attempt to get it unstuck. It's amazing.

I've also joined a new web space called jpg.com You can submit photo's and see other people's photo's and if you get published you get $100 and a year subscription. I think that would be neat.. just to see my pictures in a magazine.. Well the picture I submitted has no chance of being published until after April, but still.. Kinda neat, and moments after I put it up there, Someone else already marked it as one of their favorites. It was cool. My first submission and all.

Update: The truck is unstuck. They are now backing down the street to who knows where.. but it took them long enough.. so good for them.

Back to my story... yeah.. so I'm pretty excited about the picture thing. I also re-posted my car on kijiji.com hoping that someone would buy it. It's at the top, sometimes it gets more hits there. So we'll see. I took it off and re-added it... Hopefully that works. I already have some girl who doesn't seem to speak hardly any english that wants to see it tonight before dodgeball.. we'll see how that goes..

I hope she does come see it and I hope she buys it. Although another girl that emailed me early this week said that she's really interested and would like to see it after February 29, so maybe if this falls through and no one else wants to see it, that will work out.. you never know.. I'd be very excited...

work is going.. well going.. it's stressful right now, but I'm hoping things get better.. I think this is why I didn't ever want to have my own company, so someone else had to worry about this crap.. I mean getting work to do, keeping everyone happy, keeping the quality up, making sure my workers are happy.. all the rest.. it's stressing me out.. and I'm trying to not let it, but between the work situation and the issue of not selling the car, it's all a bit much for me right now.. oh well.. guess I'll get over it..

well I really have to get some work done.. I really should load those pictures of the truck pulling the semi.. it's pretty funny..

ok.. going..

me

whoa!

2008-01-24T12:57:00.000-07:00

I can't believe it's been so long since I put anything in here. I'm sure everyone has stopped looking, but that's ok, this is more for my own bennifit, then anyone else's. A lot has happened since then, but that's not really what I want to talk about..

I'm talking about how it seems like at different stages in my life I've thought.. well after this happens things will get easier, or back to normal, or just be better.. and how that day has never come.. there's always something I'm waiting for to make me happier, make my life better, or just make it easier... I try to not procrastinate and just take care of things as they come up.. but this being an adult, it's hard work... being responsible, taking care of everything.. I not only have to be responsible for my own life and welfare, but for Hailey's, Jason's, even Chub and the fish and the rabbit. They are all depending on me to make they're lives work.. and it wouldn't be too bad if I had some help, if I wasn't trying to take on the whole world by myself, but there's just no other way... if I want things to get done and I want things a certain way, I have to do them, because no one else is...

As a kid.. I hated chores, hated cleaning, hated helping my parents, totally resented them for 'forcing' me to do things such as clear the table after dinner, or do the dishes, or vacuum.. now.. I just wish that I didn't have to do all those things myself.. I don't mind doing them.. some one has to.. and I like the way things look when they're done, but I just sometimes wish that I had help. I am married, and jason does somethings.. just very little.. and usually after I nag him into doing it.. which I don't want to do either.. I just want help.. I just want him to do it... but it seems like that is too much to ask for and it seems to be a sore spot in our relationship all the time.. he just doesn't get it.. he doesn't understand what I'm talking about, or why I'm making such a big deal of it.. because if he doesn't want to do something he just doesn't and eventually I'll get sick of whatever it is and do it myself.. where as I think things would actually take care of them selves if I left them, well before jason would just do them.. and I'm so tired of fighting about it.. I'm just not sure if there is any other way I can possibly portray to him what I"m thinking.. it's so frustrating and I'm so exhausted and so overwhelmed about the whole situation that I'm litterally just shutting down... I just can't do it any more! and I just can't seem to stop thinking about it.. I just sit here and dwell on it until it gives me a headache... it just runs through my head, waiting for some solution to be found that keeps me from losing my mind.. but I think that's all that's going to happen.. I'm gonna have to be commited to pinoca... and everyone will have to watch out for me incase I do some thing crazy..

and I'm done typing.. done putting this down..
me

New Things

2007-11-15T22:18:00.000-07:00

Hey all you out there in blogger land..

It is I the rambler.. and well I just don't care.. I'm good with that.. so yes.. new things.. I've done some new things this weekend.. some totally new.. and some.. well it's been so long since i did them they should be new..

I volunteered to canvas for the diabetes association.. yep.. knocked on doors and asked for money... it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be.. I had it hyped up in my head that it was going to be so aweful, and it wasn't.. I saw some old neighbours (My area was the block we used to live on) and I got to see inside some of the Town houses I was curious about... and well that's about it.. I raised $80 which isn't a ton I admit, but more then the $0 that I figured I'd get, and it's $80 more then they had before.. so YAY me... it actually felt good to do a little something.. so every year I'm going to pick a different cause to volunteer for... or what ever.. be it the 'weekend to end breast cancer' walk, or a marathon for ms, or... well no.. no more canvasing.. I'm not good at it... or what ever.. I'm gonna try to do something once a year.. at least.. it makes me feel good..

also, I saw a personal trainer, first for an evaluation, and then for an actual session where she made up a routine for me to do to lose weight.. totally pumped about it.. the scale is actually even reading lower then normal.. only a few pounds.. but it's a start.. a month and a half of exercising 3 times a week, and there's finally a result!!! Go me!!!! totaly psyched about the new routine.. it's nothing major, 30 mins of cardio (at least) and then a little bit of weights, core excercises and the such, and some streatching, takes about an hour, it's great. Jason and I joined the Family Leisure Centre, a year pass for our family, so I can go when ever I want, and we can go swimming with hailey, and we can go skating on sundays.. it's great.. and Shawn and Nicole signed up too, so while nicole is on mat leave, we're going to get into shape.. but the greatest part is that Nicole was in Florida last week for vacation, and I still went.. by myself.. even to a class for the first time.. Deanna would attest to the fact that Im' a chicken shit.. I really wanted to try kickboxing, but I needed her to go with me to the first class so that I could get over the fear of starting something new.. but I did it.. I started something, and I"ve been to the gym three times a week for the last 3 weeks (well this gym.. three weeks before that it was the calgary parks and rec gym) and I'm so pumped.. and now there's results.. I just want to do more.. I had to slow down a little though.. poor quads.. so sore.. but they'll be better tomorrow after a good work out and a stretch.. I tried to stretch then today.. and they're better, but still a little sore.. It will get better I know it will.. so my trainer says everytime I go to the gym I have to use a different piece of cardio equipment.. so tomorrow I'm going to try the rowing machine.. what a funny little thing.. but apparently rowing is supposed to be very good for you.. so why not.. maybe next summer I'll even sign up for some lessons or something.. I dunno.. I'm feeliing adventurous.. it's just such a great feeling doing something new.. and there's so much out there.. so much I want to do and try..

I guess I'm good with the whole being ok at many things, but not great at any one thing.. it's just how I am.. and it's working good for me..

So yeah.. this week my other new thing was the abs and buns of steel class.. oh gosh.. oh no that was last week.. but I went again this week.. still hurt...

and I'm selling a car.. so if you know anyone that wants a 97 red dodge neon, 2 door, automatic.. let me know.. I have a deal for you...

what else.. I thought there was more.. something nice happened..

tonight when I went out to do my canvasing, Jason made me peanut butter and chocolate chip cookies.. I've been wanting some for months now, but never make them.. and have really wanted some the past couple weeks, and he keeps saying no.. but when I went canvasing, he figured since I was doing my part to help out, he could make me cookies.. what a sweetie.. times like that I just love him so much.. so thoughtful.. unfortunatly it's not all the time.. but the times when he is like that make all the other times worth it..

I've decided that my definition of love is if you can't picture your self with out the person.. no matter what happens or how mad or upset you get.. you just can't imagine life with out them.. that might not be right away, and it might not happen when you expect that it should, but if it does, then that is true love to me...

hhmmmmm.. what else...well I actually went into airdrie last week.. yeah.. stopped in there to get gas, and to go to mcdonalds before.. just on the way through to edmonton or rocky mountain house, but never actually went into airdrie before.. well now I have.. that's our new area at work, so I had to check things out.. who knows what's up there.. guess I should go check again.. I was a little overwhelmed and dad wouldn't slow down.. he doesn't like airdrie at all.. it's not a bad place, although that was the only time I've really been there, so what do I know???

we're also in Kincora and Coventry, needless to say, I'm going through a lot more gas.. good thing I'm making the company pay for more.. go me again!!!

Cathy's wedding is drawing nearer, and I'm totally excited.. we're having her stagette this saturday, and it's going to be great.. a totally cathy day.. she's going to love it... and then what else?? hhmmmm... I dunno..

it seems like I had so much to say..

oh yeah.. went for a girls overnight out to lethbridge to drive lindsay home after she had her recovery time in calgary after having her tonsils out.. it was great.. cathy and I talked the whole time.. lindsay did a little talking.. a lot of laughing, both of which still hurt at the time.. we watched some movies.. talked about everything.. and yeah.. just had a really great great time.. totally want to do that again..

hmm.. what else.. I guess that's about it.. I guess my life isn't really that exciting.. but it's exciting me..

I'm doing web pages again.. actually the two that I did last year are just back for some updates.. oh yeah.. have to check for Loretta's.. thanks for reminding me..

and now I'm going to go to bed because I'm so tired.. check out hailey's new pics on facebook.. she's so cute.. and I'm too tired to load any up here..

nite.. have to be beautiful tomorrow, we're getting family photo's done.. first time... and I have to look good... not like today and my new drivers licence picture.. it's terrifying.. yikes!!

ciao for now,
me

It's been forever!!!

2007-10-29T08:09:00.000-06:00

I'm sure anyone that did read this ever has stopped because according to my blog, I've fallen off the planet!

Well what has happened since August... A lot I'm sure, but at this crazy early hour in the morning, it all escapes me.

This weekend was my 4th annual Halloween Eekstravaganza.. it was a great time.. I think everyone enjoyed themselves, and except for the fact that I was trying to fight a case of the flu (I think) I had a great time. My Wilma costume finally worked, So Jay and I were Fred and Wilma Flinstone. Hailey was a Love Bug, and everyone who dressed up looked amazing. Nicki and court took 1st prize with their Shrek and Fionna costumes, Josh a close second with his Whoopie cushion... and Danny Last, but only just barely, Greg was a very close almost last because he has used the same costume a number of years in a row.. next year, he'll have to work on something original!

The house is going well. We had our house warming party on the Thanksgiving long weekend.. It was a great time.. that was a busy weekend. We had a bbq, that turned rather large on the friday, a house warming party on the saturday, Jason's parents, my parents, Both of jason's brothers and all of Nathan's family, my brother, paula, uncle Lawrence and LJ and Lindsay and us of course for supper on sunday for thanks giving, and then died on the couch on the monday, except to walk to main street to get a coffee and a movie.. it was good...

we got a new gas bbq, jason's very excited about that.. it's good.. and it has a smoker, which I am discovering that I really kinda like.. changes things up a bit..

we built a little fence around the parking pad out back so we could park our cars there, still getting used to it.. it's only been a week, and I haven't done a ton of driving yet..

The neon is back.. yeah.. danny decided it was a bad time for him to try to buy it.. so I have to try to sell it now.. not sure how that works, but yeah.. gotta do it... Jason figures he should help, but that's not how it works.. so I will go today or soon and get the little signs and then I'll put an ad in the bargain finder.. see if we can sell the thing.. maybe make more then I was going to trying to sell it to danny... hopefully...

work is.. well I'm not sure what work is.. I'm trying to get a lot done, but there really isn't a lot to do. We have no houses to do right now, and we're trying to work with three different builders, almost 4.. can't believe it.. the market sure has changed in calgary.. dad says as soon as the builders figure out that house prices aren't sky rocketing any more, they'll lower new home prices and we'll get really busy again.. we'll see.. I hope so.. we were trying to make some money.. The one builder that we currently work for primarily, is going to give us the whole city. Until now, we've only taken care of the south, and we're too fast, the company that was doing the north backed out, so we're taking over, but we're not sure if there's still anything for us to do.

I'm trying very hard to get into shape.. for the last three weeks I've gone on the eliptical once a week for 30 mins, I've gone for a 45 minute jog at least once a week, I've gone to the core class that's an hour and then followed it up with 13 minutes on the treadmill once a week... and yeah.. haven't lost any weight, don't think i've lost any inches.. but going to keep trying.. something is bound to start working.. I'm sure it's because I'm not eating right... but I'm working on that too.. small changes... I can do it.. As a result though, Hailey is getting better at going to the babysitters at the gym.. she cried for 45 minutes the first time, but I think we've gotten it down to 5. When work picks up again, I'm think I'm going to take her to a day home a couple days a week so that she can kinda get used to it, get a little socializing..

well I think I hear the monster stirring, and I have to have a shower still before I want to get her out of bed.. so I'll talk to you guys all later. I'm sure I have a lot more to say, that seems like an awefully small blog for someone who hasn't been here since august, and especially me..

so I'll be back.. with more..

later

sorry... blogger won't publish my pictures...

Thinking of trying something that terrifies me...

2007-08-26T23:24:00.000-06:00

So I know that I have a million things on the ol' To DO list... but why not add one more.?? I'm thinking I may want to join Westwinds again... it will be a rather expensive adventure as I would have to purchase an instrument... at first (about 20 minutes ago when I started thinking of this again.. it happens frequently) I thought I'd want to join and play alto saxophone.. It's what I started on, and I love the instrument, but there are usually a lot of players and it's quite comptetitive...

Then I was on the westwinds website, and low and behold there is a bassoon for sale.. it's like a sign.. the guy lives in calgary and I did something stupid.. I emailed to see if it was still for sale... What am I thinking.. I have too much to do already.. but I really do love music.. and I often think of playing.. although I have a guitare sitting not 5 feet from me that I can't play one song on, and I have to change the strings but I keep forgetting to get my tuner back from greg because he used it for his canadian idol audition and didn't give it back.. so I'm not sure why I'm even thinking of this.

I just remember really liking the feeling when I was playing in a group, and it sounds good and the goosebumps you get when you go to a performance and everyone is clapping for you... what if I did that again?? I really did like it?? but what about all the other things I want to do?? Why can't I have everything?? I want to work on my house and make it beautiful, and me... and I want to learn to paint... and I want to tie flies that I can use to catch fish come the spring next year (didn't even get my licence this year.. dispicable.. I was pregnant last year and still got my licence..) I want to rollerblade more and bike ride more, and swim more, and I want to get really really good at something.. and I want to read more.. I watched marie antoinette today.. and I'd really like to learn more about what happened... I want to learn lots of things..

my life is like this house... there are a million things I want to do, and I'm filled with the best of intentions.. but... I'm not getting anywhere thinking about everything.. I'm spinning my wheels and getting no where.. so I guess I'm just going to have to find a way to stop that.. a way to just get things done.. pick one thing to do around the house and do it until it's finished.. and pick one hobbie to try for the time being, and then once I'm as good as I'd like to be.. try something else..

why am I cursed with being interested in everything.. I'm not smart enough or diciplined enough to do everything... take Josh for instance.. he doesn't know everything.. (sorry to state that josh.. love you still) but he sure knows a lot.. and about a lot of different topics.. geography, music, computers, websites, photography, news, just everything.. he just knows a ton about everything... I'm envious, and wish I could be more like him... he truly does leave something to work towards...

I want to know more about something.. I want to know a lot about just a few things.. right now, I know a little about a lot of things.. I want to know alot about something.. maybe now isn't the right time to join westwinds.. maybe I need to focus on things I already have on the go... and try them out for a change... hmm... what to pick?? I really should be sleeping.. I have to get up early and brush chub's hair before he goes to the puppy salon to get a hair cut.. if i dont' brush him, then she cuts off all the hair on his tail and he looks really rather funny..

ok.. going to go now..

me

The To Do list from Hell...

2007-08-25T15:32:00.000-06:00

Daily my 'to do' list grows.. for those of you that know me well, you know that I am queen of the lists.. I love making lists.. lists of everything.. well I sat down when we first moved in a made a list of things I'd like to get accomplished.. and I added.. and I've added.. and I keep adding.. and now, Jason's adding... so needless to say, it's the to do list from hell. I don't think there is a possibility that it will ever get finished.. as we speak right now, Jason is cutting a rather large hole in the wall above the fireplace so he can attache plywood so we can mount our TV because our tv was in a dumb spot and needed to be moved, when we finally decided to put it above the tv we promptly discovered that the studs are too far apart for our wall bracket so we either can't put it there, or have to come up with a way to fasten our 150 lbs tv to a wall that we can only hit one stud at a time with our bracket. So he decided since we were already going to cut a whole in the wall to put the wires for the stereo and cable and such that we might as well cut a giant whole in the wall and put in 3/4 inch plywood and mount the tv to that. so again.. he's cutting a whole in the wall.. a big one, and it's going to span most of the width of the fireplace, and then he's going to cut smaller holes in the space beside the fire place so he can fish wires down the wall.. I'm so excited.. because that evil to do list is growing and growing.. if only I could grow plants as well as I grow this to do list.. I'd have one heck of a green thumb... and my house would look better not worse...

it seems like this whole house is an ever larger to do list... got infested with slugs last week, had to kill them and pick some out of the grass (did that with the pooper scooper) got infested with flies this week.. the fly tape in the pink room is doing wonderfully, and I have since sprayed all the plants in that room and will spray all the rest of the plants in the remainder of the house, with insecticide to hopefully get rid of all the flies...

the walls have so many dings and scratches and holes that I kinda feel like I'm 'patching the whole entire house.. it really really looks like the house has chicken pox... and I'm not done yet...

again.. just incase I haven't mentioned it before.. I'm the kinda person that has all the best intentions.. I want to do everything... and I want it done perfectly... I have big plans, big ideas, bit abmitions.. and then I make my infamous list... and then I add to my list.. and then I look around and see 'everything' that has to be done and I get overwhelmed and do nothing.. not a single thing.. absolutly nothing... I clam up and hide and whine about it... how pathetic... I'm not sure how to over come this, and I know i have a problem.. I'm admitting it.. it's just me...

I know I should just look at smaller chunks.. pick something and just do it.. try to keep to one specific task and do it exactly like I want it and then finish and move on... so instead I take pictures and I come on my blog.. and continue to be overwhelmed.. I'm going to go do something on my to do list...

ciao for now...

a long time it seems...

2007-08-21T22:53:00.000-06:00

I thought I had just put a message up on here a little while ago, but I guess not... oh well... What's new? well I'm busier then heck.. holly shoot.. really would like to slow down.. there just isn't time.. good thing I got that hot tub.. forces me to stop and relax.. I really should be in bed right now, I'm really really tired, but for some reason I thought I should update the world on the not really important events of my life...

hmm.. been painting the acadia house for the last two days.. hoping it will end soon because I don't want to paint it any more.. kinda want to stay home and work on my own house, clean it, unpack it, organize it, finish some started projects like the garden and stuff.. start some projects like painting and stuff.. it would be nice.. if only there were time.. maybe later.. we'll see... yeah right.. when I die!!!

and since that will not be for a long long long time.. I have to just keep going... hm... what else.. Nicki's wedding was beautiful, she's married, and to a great guy that's totally her perfect match, so I couldn't be happier for them... Nicole and Baby Evan are doing great, he's growing like a weed, eating like a pig and so darn cute...

Hailey's growing up way to fast, she's walking very confidently now, she's all over that, and she's into everything.. and still so stinking cute, but getting such an attitude.. if you have a solution to the screaming that sometimes comes out of her, please share.. because I would like to know.. not sure what to do.. is she like a dog, if you don't dicipline her right away she's not sure what it's for.. and what do you do just tell her no?? seems kinda redundent.. we'll see.. I'm sure I'll figure something out..

not sure what to do with her.. to this point she's been pretty easy, now is the time though that she is molded into a little person... she's going to be talking soon, but how much of that do I have to actually teach her and how much does she just pick up. And she's getting curious about everything, how far to let her go?? and she's kinda learning about feeding herself, but hasn't quite gotten it, how long before I'm like.. ok.. you're big enough.. you're on your own now, and when do I take away her bottle and only give her the sippy cup, and when do I take away her soother, and when does she sleep in a 'big girl bed'? with out the sides on it, and when and how do I start potty training.. see this is the hard part of her life, I think the rest I'll be ok with, but this is the part I'm completely at a loss for... I'm totally not sure of anything or how or what to do.. it's kinda freaky.. never really been around other people a whole lot that went through this, so I'm not positive what I'm supposed to do.. maybe I'll check out the little book the dr gives you when they're born.. yikes.. better start figuring things out..

well I'm pretty tired, and now my arms are tired from typing like a fiend.. better go to bed.. I'll leave you with a few pictures.. I think... we'll see how long that takes..

me

And things are better once again..

2007-08-03T08:47:00.000-06:00

I am corrected on my spelling of Fowl.. I knew it was wrong.. but my brain was not in the mood to figure it out.. Thanks Josh.. I was in a Foul mood.. not a bird mood... I knew it wasn't right when I put it up there...

Today I go see Paula Graduate from Police Academy.. I"m very excited.. I'm so proud of her, she has fought so hard to get here, I just can't believe she's finally done. All the applying, all the schooling, all the everything.. starting sunday night.. she's a cop.. Congrats paula... You are an inspiration and an amazing example for the rest of us. Just don't give me any speeding tickets please.. *giggles* only if you have to I guess...

So yeah, yesterday was my anniversary.. the hot tub got fixed.. changed out a whole pump.. but it works great now... Jason planned our evening.. and it was a great idea... he stopped at the grocery store on the way home, and then came home, packed up Hailey's little red wagon, and we went for a walk to the near by water fountain/park thing here in Mckenzie Towne. We had a pic nic with some really good foods, and we played in the water, Hailey played with everything and flirted with all the boys, and we came home. We watched a movie with some wine, we went in the hot tub, everything was very romantic.. who knew he had it in him.. he even brought me flowers... it was perfect... very relaxing, very romantic, very perfect...

well it's 9 now, I better get dressed, wake and ready the baby, and get out the door.. have to be down town at a little after 11 so I can get a good seat... I'll talk to you later.
Me

Fowl!

2007-08-02T10:33:00.000-06:00

I'm not sure if that's the right spelling, but oh well.. that's what I'm feeling.. it's my anniversary today. I'm supposed to be happy. Last night in the hot tub with Danny, Greg, jason and myself and the stupid thing is broken, it's flipping the breaker over and over.. YAY! Brand new and broken already.. so the guy is here fixing it as we speak.. changing out a whole pump... nothing serious though... we were told you should never have problems with the pumps.. yeah right.. or the first day you own it you will... yikes.. this is a bad omen.... so yes.. after the sales man telling me that it's the electricians fault and the electrician (bruce) telling me it's the tub I finally get the sales man to say they'll send someone out. the guy that hooked it up actually.. which is funny because he's in Salmon Arm for the next week or so.. so I'm going to have no hot tub till then? I don't think so.. so I explained that it was our anniversary and I wanted it done sooner then later, and here he is... YAY! and then hailey wakes up in the most fowl mood ever.. screaming louder then I've ever heard her scream before, so I fed her a bottle and put her back to bed.. haven't heard a peep out of her yet.. hopefully she sleeps or something.. rotten little baby.. I am spoiled though.. Shawn and Nicole have their little one at home now.. he's a week and three days old today... he is being breast fed and he is up every 2-3 hours to eat.. well if it takes an hour to eat and then in a couple more he's up again to eat again.. let me tell you how much sleep Nicole isn't getting... A LOT... so I got spoiled with Hailey she slept really really well for her whole life... Even my friend Shane and his new little boy.. he's 8 weeks old.. Amy says that if he goes to bed around midnight then he'll sleep till 5 or 6... yikes.. that just seems like not a long time in the way of sleeping.. if I go to bed at midnight, I don't want to get up at 5 or 6... mind you Amy seems to be doing the bulk of the baby care in that relationship.. I think shanes just waiting for the fun stuff.. Shane that's not fair.. he's your kid too... you get just as many poopy diapers... thank god jason never had any problems with that.. he just did and still just does it..

my car is still at the shop.. yep... well over two weeks ago I took it in... at least monday they gave me a rental... that's handy.. dad can have his truck back.. I think he's much happier... I think the work thing is going to get worked out.. yeah.. working with my dad and my brother is trying at times.. but I think we can make it work.. I just have to not get so worked up about whatever it is that they are having problems with.. we'll see how that goes.. I think I'm seriously going to look into party planning and see how to get myself started in that.. I figure if I start now while I still have a job, then when this job is over I can really pick things up and it will take off.. well that's my plan anyway.. not sure how many people have a need for a party planner.. even just wedding planner.. either way, doing stuff like that is my forte so I think I'm gonna look into doing it for aliving.. I think I'd be really good at it...

well I better check on my hot tub guy.. better find myself some brunch cuz I haven't eaten yet today.. really need to go grocery shopping.. I think that would help with the eating regularly...

ciao for now.. I'm not always in a bad mood.. I think it seems that way on here because I mostly come here and vent when I'm in a fowl mood, but really I'm kinda a happy person.. sometimes.. I think.. *giggles* this is just my thing.. when things are bothering me, I feel better when they are in writing.. so yeah.. that's what I do.. I type.. makes me feel better..

ok.. going now.. lots to do today.. hopefully going to get my clothes put away.. and some work done.. who woulda thunk it..

me

Some times your just mad and dissapointed.

2007-07-22T23:51:00.000-06:00

you just are.. or maybe it's just me.. apprently there's a lot of things that are just me.. I just get annoyed when people do things I don't understand over and over and over again... I get mad when I try to go out of my way to do something for anyone and then they either don't appreciate it or can't be bothered to contribute to anything... to anything.. their special event or other evenrs for people...

if you can't appreciate something that you're always asking for then don't f***ing ask for it all the damn time... don't ask for anything.. and why if I think I'm so perceptive to what people are like and working around it, can't I deal with a particular person? what can I do to just not be in shit all the time!???!!!

Sometimes it just doesn't matter what you do.. some people are just not going to be happy.. so stop trying.. why can't I get this through my head??? Some people just push all the right buttons and then they have no idea, but expect me to just deal with it when they are bad mouthing me to my own husband! How infuriating.. just frustrated.. hot, tired, sore, dissapointed, tired of my house looking like a bomb went off in it, and having no idea where anything is...

and did I mention tired and hot.. I'd sleep on the porch or the deck, but the frigging big ass spiders would get me.. ok.. don't want to type on here any more.. no more attention span.. too tired..
nite
me

Amazing.

2007-07-17T12:59:00.000-06:00

Amazing how in 24 hours everything can see that much better.

Well the durango's still been violated, and that's still a pain in the butt, driving mom's truck till, who knows when, cops should phone today at some point, then take it in for a quote tomorrow, and hopefully insurance can come look at it soon there after. We'll see how that all goes...

Regardless of that, things today are better. I found out some good news about the house and our finances, and things are way better then I thought, cuz with all the extras, I was starting to get pretty worried. The lawyer finally phoned we go tomorrow to sign everything so it will all be taken care of... YAY really getting my house on thursday. Things are going well with all or at least 99% of my friends. My basement is completley packed, the rest of the house maybe 2.5 more hours and we'll have it totally done too, the basement only took a 1/2 hour yesterday so that was cool... hailey blows kisses now, and it's so cute, I'll have to try to catch it on the video camera. And yeah. life is good today. I'm excited, and hot and sweaty, but really really excited..

ok.. gonna go work inside now, it's too hot out here.. ciao for now guys..

me

what to call this?

2007-07-16T12:30:00.000-06:00

I'm not sure what to say right here... I started out this morning a little stressed because I wanted to get a lot of work done.. and I had a lot to do... I had to go to the store first thing this morning because Hailey needed diapers and bottle liners.. so I wasn't even going to take out the diaper bag.. i was just going to run out, only be a minute.. first i was mad because jason parked the durango in a tree, and didn't do up the car seat when he put it back... so I had to fix it.. and I did... noticed the consol was open, didn't think of it...

got to the front... noticed some beads, thought that was weird.. wondered where they came from, noticed my partial ice cap spilled all over.. papers askew... then realized my xm radio was gone...

called jay, told him what happened, called paula got the phone number for the police, called the police they told me they'd call back and take a statement, call my dad, call jason, call the insurance company, call the dealership, by that point jason is home, call the dealership again... go with jason to my brother's house pick up mom's truck... so now I'm driving my mom's cozicar... I've been to walmart, but I haven't started any work yet..

what a morning.. I can't believe my luck.. now I have to fork over the deductible.. and I'm very upset.. lindsay would understand and know what to say, but I can't find her.. Lindsay where are you????

ok.. going to work now..
me

Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes, Knees and Toes

2007-07-15T20:25:00.001-06:00

yeah.. just finished bath time... and I was singing that to Hailey to calm her down because she wanted to stand in the tub and Jason and I thought that was a bad idea.. Absolutley amazing the things you never thought you'd do and then you are... too funny... but she's worth it.. 100% 1000 000% worth it... As she sits here in her diaper on Jason's knee giggling and drinking a bottle.. it makes me smile...

The packing is going well.. I can't believe it's only 3 more days away... then my house is someone elses.. well technically it's not someone elses for nearly two weeks, but it's not mine on thursday because I'm leaving.. weird.. I'm really gonna miss it.. I keep taking pictures so I won't forget anything.. it's funny... Danny was commenting on wednesday as hailey learned to walk... that he's glad that there were no digital cammera's when he was younger because he would want that many pictures of himself all over the place... it's crazy how many pictures I do take.. I'll just snap away because I can see how it will look in a photo album.. even though none of my digital pictures have made it to a photo album yet.. at least not mine.. I just take them, and store them on my computer for the infamous 'someday' maybe in the new house, I'll actually get to that.. like all the 100 million other things that I'm going to get to... the list goes forever... scrap booking, learning guitare, tying flies, fly fishing, floating on the river, roller blading, bike riding, exercising, baking, cooking different foods I've never tried... yeah.. a million things.. including starting my own business or two.. yeah.. getting right on it.. not that courageous... too scared of the what if's.. never thought I'd be like that.. but I really am.. I seem to need a lot of reassurances and security.. again.. who knew I'd be like that.. crazy! I always thought of myself as independant and adventurous.. so don't tell anyone, my cover wll be blown.. aweful thing that is to let slip...

So we're moving on thursday.. so excited... can't wait to see the place again.. it's different when you move into a used house as opposed to a brand new one.. the new one.. you can see as often as you like until the date of possession.. now.. nothing.. got to see it once for an hour, made an offer, got to see it for another 1/2 hour but the people were home so didn't really want to look around very much... should have.. oh well.. three more days and I will look at it all the time.. and already jason and I have some pretty big plans for it.. as is true jason and joie style.. mostly the garden, Hailey's room, the office and the garage, or lack there of a garage... should be great.. and the hot tub should be there in just over 2 weeks.. that rocks.. and the parties this weekend and next.. so excited about all of them.. can't wait for them.. just want to see how everyone reacts when they see everything.. can't spill any details on here on the off chance paula or nicole or cathy comes on and see's it.. that would suck..

well i'm going to go have a bath and wash some of the grime off of me.. moving when it's 30 degrees celcius outside is a terrible terrible idea.. I've been sweating like a pig... something you all wanted to know.. well I didn't either, but even Hailey was dripping and she already had her bath.. so it's my turn..

ciao for now,

Happy Birthday Jay (he'll never read that but makes me feel better putting it up there)

luv ya lots,
me

Hailey Walks, Bon Jovi Rocks, and...

2007-07-12T09:02:00.000-06:00

Hailey Learns to get on, off and sit on the Bench.
Hailey's Second Annual Mckenzie Towne Stampede Breakfast!
Hailey gets better at standing, and figures out the walking deal!

I packed all my socks? Sorry, couldn't come up with something else...

Yesterday was quite the day! Started out with Mckenzie Towne's Stampede Breakfast... good times had by all. Continued with some errands, work and not so work related, and while visiting with Danny and Chris on Danny's front lawn, we put Hailey on the grass and she decided now was a good time to figur out this walking thing, because she doesn't like the way grass feels so she doesn't like to crawl on it.. it was really cute.. first she just stood there, and I bet it was almost 10 minutes, just looking at us.. it might have been less time, but it felt like a long time.. then mom put her hands out and Hailey took 5 steps to her. Up until this point she's taken 1 or two steps, but then she either falls or reaches where she wants to be.. so this was great.. then she walked 5-6 steps to nicole, and back to me.. she was walking all over.. only about 5 steps at a time.. but still.. it's great!

Then we were at my mom's house and she did it again, down the hallway.. I think she's catching on to this.. and just in time for the new house.. that's great..

Then last night Jason and I went to the Bon Jovi concert.. Very excited about that... It was a great concert, I think it was two Encores, but jason says it was 3, who knows.. either way he started the night with Living on a prayer, and he ended it with Wanted Dead or Alive.. and it rocked all the way through! It was amazing.. and there's just something about a live performance that always gives me goose bumps.. All those people in one place, for one reason, everyone's excited, and singing along.. the energy in there is just on fire! I just love looking around and seeing all the people standing up and dancing like no one cares, and singing their hearts out... makes me not be so self concious and do the same. We're united by our love of music! It's great... just such an amazing feeling... and then there's great music to go with the whole experiance.. who could ask for more... if I wasn't so excited and didn't love Bon Jovi so much, I could have just sat in my chair and taken in the whole thing, just watching, and listening, it's the best feeling..

And as for the packing, well I didn't pack all my socks yet, but I have a feeling they aren't far behind.. one more week untill we move and so I'm sure that between tonight and sunday night, Jason will have everything packed up, well he won't pack it himself, but he'll tell me what to do, and we'll have to be eating off disposable dishware next week because it will all be packed up! Which is good, it will make moving on Thursday that much better, if the bank ever send the lawyer the information so we can get our house. Our real esate agent keeps trying to reassure me that there are no problems, but, I'm a little skeptical... Why is it that any proffession involved in Selling houses can't just do what they're supposed to do when they're supposed to do it, so that it's a stress and problem free experiance for all involved??? I don't get it...

well I hear the baby so I better get her out of bed, and I have to get some actual work done today, invoicing day tomorrow and Centrex needs a quote on a specific house so I have to get that to them my noon.. like I promised... so I better get this party started... I can hear the prisoner kicking the bars of her cell.. so I better go give her some slop...

ciao for now,

me

It's me again Margaret.

2007-07-05T07:43:00.000-06:00

I don't know why I ever say that, the only one who gets it is my mom... it's a Ray Stevens song.. and in the video he's this dirty little man calling 'Margaret' over and over.. and eventually gets arrested.. it makes me laugh.. it's a funny song and video..

regardless, it actually had nothing to do with what I was going to put here today. Not sure what I'm going to put here. I was just browsing through facebook and peoples pictures and stuff... there's some good stuff out there.. I like looking and seeing what other people have been doing.. and it's a bonus that I don't have to start some small talk to do it.. I just go look.. how handy..

The house is getting more and more packed up... Last night we tackled the garage.. now it's not nearly so intimidating.. We've gotten the bulk of it ready to go and sorted.. a bit more to go through and pack up and sort, but I'm sure tonight we could have it ready. I'm headed to the dump with my dad with probably more then a truck load of stuff, most of it coming out of the garage.. opps.. that's a lot of stuff.. but I think it's good. We're getting rid of a lot of stuff that we really don't need to hold on to, so hopefully at the next place, we just don't buy the garbage stuff and if we do, hopefully we don't hold on to it.. we should make an annual trip to the dump with all the junk.. *giggles* maybe in the spring... hahahahhah.. spring cleaning.. who's ever heard of a ludicris idea like that (was that spelled right.. oh well.. not gonna check..) hmm.. I hear the baby, but she's not supposed to be up yet.. yeah.. false alarm... anyway, what was I saying??? Oh yes.. we collect a lot of junk..

next on the list... Camping was good.. had a great time.. did a little golfing, got rained on, did some tanning, a lot of cleaning and cooking, and I'm not sure what else... a lot of visiting.. it was a really good time... the 'kids' played a lot of poker.. I say kids, and my Grandma was right in there like a fat kid on a smartie... yep.. she was cleaning house with those crazy children and grand children of hers.. and go her.. makes the retirement just a little bit sweeter... *giggles* never teach your grandma to play texas hold-em.. it's a new kind of poker, but grandma's been playing poker longer then any of us have even been alive!!! so she wins! hahahhahahahah. It was funny.. sometimes she took pitty on them, and split the pot.. but I think that was just to speed things up so she could claim her next victims..

Well I guess I should do my dishes and get my day started.. I'm expecting my dad to call any minute and tell me he's outside my garage door already loading his truck.. which would defeat the purpose of me doing it because his back is sore.. again.. maybe he should give up his career as a golfer... oh well to each their own..

I do have some pic's.. I'll put them up...

ciao for now,
me

A sad day

2007-06-29T07:12:00.000-06:00

Well, I finally sold the Neon. It did me good. It was my frist car that I bought on my own, and it lasted a long time, it's still going, in good shape... got a fair price for it... Sold it to my brother. Yeah, he wanted something to work on.. so he bought it off me.. it's not sitting in visitor parking any more.. how sad.. I'll take a picture of the maks it left behind though.. they're funny... looks like it's still there, but a ghost...

regardless, sold it.. sold my first house.. it's a lot of first sells this month.. and Hailey's first birthday... wow.. lots going on.. the first two parties of the season (of the big one's that I'm throwing this summer) went off well. I think everyone had a good time at Nicki's Bridal shower and Hailey's birthday party.

But alas I must keep this short and moan about my car another day, we are going camping for the long weekend and I have to get ready.. totally tired.. think I might sleep on the way there... but have to pack me and hailey still and then go do my work for the morning, go to jason's parents house to see their progress, and then go camping.. goodness.. a long day ahead of me..

and my hands are dry.. need some lotion.. ciao for now,
me

And it's me again.

2007-06-21T13:00:00.001-06:00

Just feeling all warm and fuzzy inside.. and I haven't even been drinking...

I was looking at Tom's pictures, and Josh's Pictures, and they are just so beautiful. I wish I could take pictures like that. I wish a lot of things.. do you think I'm wasting all my life away wishing for other things? oh well, that's what I do.. and I try to make some of my wishes come true.. someday.. they'll all come true..

I'm just feeling very.. I dunno.. almost melancholy.. I hope I used that in the right context, and it is what I mean? what ever.. it seems to fit.. I was visiting with Lindsay this week, and I'm so excited for her.. such a great adventure she's about to embark on... it's going to be so amazing.. oh the things she's going to see.. I can't wait to see pictures of that... and I was visiting with Nicole Kobie a couple weeks ago.. I love hearing about her stories of what happens over in London and surrounding area. And Josh here, and he's been to a ton of places recently... that's so great, again.. love the pictures.. love the stories.. I guess that's what this is about.. just how much I love seeing and hearing of other people's adventures.. and just want more of my own...

I have a big adventure.. her name is Hailey, and I have a feeling the two of us are going to have tons of fun for many many years to come.. it sounds so cheesy.. but I hope we have the kind of relationship that Laurilei and Rory had on Gilmores.. I love that show.. and it's over.. boo... just what a great mother daughter relationship.. my mom and I have a good relationship.. as I think all mothers and daughters should.. wouldn't want to miss out on that...

I'm excited for my new house.. doesn't seem real right now.. just a dream... we haven't started packing, we haven't gotten any new stuff for it.. we haven't looked at any new stuff for it.. we talk about it quite a bit.. but it's like we talk about the trips we're going to go on and the things we're going to do.. it's a someday kinda thing...

I did how ever get some boxes last night.. so the packing can begin.. and I got a ton of boxes so I think we won't have to go find any more..

talking to many people I haven't talked to for a while lately, I'm on that crazy facebook, and people that I haven't seen or talked to since jr high (gonna date myself sorry) so about around 11 years now... and people from highschool so only 8 years since I've had anything to do with them.. crazyness... good to hear what other people are doing though.. maybe that could be my profession... a professional story listener.. I should be an editor.. I'd be great at it.. I wonder if I could possibly get a job as an editor.. I'm sure tons of people would love that job, so it's probably pretty hard to get into... I was thinking physio therapist.. I think I could be good at that too.. hmm... gonna have to narrow this down at some point in my life.. or just go for it.. just jump in with both feet and give it a shot.. I mean other people do things with out knowing for sure if it's the right decision.. why can't I??? I could.. maybe that's what I should start doing.. stop dreaming.. and start doing.. if only money wasn't a fator.. darn money.. love it but hate it.. oh well I could still do things.. gonna vow again to start doing more things and dreaming and talking about them less.. well not stop dream and talking about things less, but stop dreaming and talking about them exclusivly... start actually getting out there and making things happen...

where to start?? Party planning? Writing a book.. becoming a great painter?? hhmmmm... where to start.. well how about starting with going to get the baby and then doing my work for Rockin' R&D before my boss has a canary.. actually got work done today.. that's a bonus.. but in 4 hours I have to attend the Hoover Family Fun night and I have to get more stuff done and wake the baby up and let her have another nap all before we go..

ciao for now my loyal readers..

me

Blogs

2007-06-19T12:48:00.000-06:00

At first I thought this was a rather silly thing to do as, who would want to read about anything I had to say. And I go through my friends blogs, (Actually only two, Nicole's and Josh's) and I realize how much I really like reading them. I enjoy reading about what's happening, what they're thinking, what they're doing, seeing the pictures, all of it. I just like it. It's like a book that you really connect with the characters and you never have to worry about it ending, there's new chapters coming out all the time. So I highly recommend it to everyone to start a blog. And if you have one and read this, send me a link and I'll link yours to mine so that other people (well people that I know, or read my blog) could read the latest chapters too. I'm totally hooking Lindsay up with one, as her adventures are about to get really good. It's a very exciting chapter coming up, moving to Korea and visiting all the surrounding countries. I'm so jealous, but more proud and excited for her to let any kind of jealousy slip through. And I just love reading about everyone's adventures because it's like I'm there and I get to experiance what they are experiancing... so Thanks!

Nothing exciting here right now I'm afraid to report. We had Hailey's First birthday on the weekend. There was a ton of people (34 adults and 9 kids to be exact) and it couldn't have turned out better. Everyone had fun, Hailey had a blast, the cake turned out amazing, (totaly have to post a picture of that on here), just everything worked out great. I love throwing parties for that exact reason. To have a large number of people that I know and care for under one roof all having a good time because of something I planned... no better feeling. I think I've decided that I should be a party planner.. I think it will work out great. As I was discussing with Lindsay and Josh not a half hour ago.. my only problem is I want to do everything, and I'm not willing to settle for missing a single thing.

Some day, I will do it all, I have no doubts about that.. it just means that things are never going to slow down, I just have to get that through my head when my head and my body are screaming at me to slow down..

I don't think I'll ever slow down. I might miss something, and that is just un-acceptable. I want to do it all, and I will!

So all house stuff is final! We signed the acceptance of the offer on the house. The first guys sold their house last friday ( a week and a half ago) and so our house was officially sold this past friday! Can you believe it.. I can't.. I can't believe we're moving.. this is my house.. but it has never really been my 'home' so I'm glad about the next one, because it already felt like my home when we walked through it. I'll keep you posted for the house warming! You can see pictures of the new place on Facebook (crazy addictive little program).

I have so much more to say, but it's already 1pm and I haven't done any work yet today, well not work work, just some house cleaning and some visiting.. so I have to get to my actual job work. Can't be slacking, my boss is a real jerk... *giggles*

ok, holly crap! Lindsay just scared the crap out of me.. thought she'd be halfway back to lethbridge.. apprently she's just leaving now.. ok.. my heart is slowing down.. going.. listening to some good tunes, better eat a little lunch and get to work..

ciao for now all my fellow bloggers, and just people who, like me, enjoy reading about other people's adventures, no matter how big or small.

well well well...

2007-06-07T16:00:00.000-06:00

This is the condo that has to sell.. these are the red cabinets and the crazy tile floor.
This is our house.. we move July 19 YAY!

Yep.. things aren't slowing down a bit.. well maybe a little.. I actually have watched a couple movies this week, and last night actually had time to play my Wii... so that's cool... still really busy with dad.. trying to get everything figured out before he left for his annual fishing trip.. not totally figured out.. but what better way to learn how to do something then to just toss your self in and figure it out as you go? no better way for me to do it...

so works busy, and I'm kinda figuring it out.. still lots of it to do.. but it's coming..

The house thing is going good... we did get the finanancing on the Prestwick Estates house.. I'm very excited.. can't wait.. I'll try and get some pics up here from it... we move July 19.... wow, that's soon.. only 1 month and 12 days.. that's crazy..

what else?? uh.. well, we listed our house last friday and the very first night at the very first showing, the people loved it and put in an offer.. but it's conditional that they sell their house in Edmonton, so we'll see.. I was pretty confident at first, but now I'm a little worried.. we only had that one showing on friday and then one on sunday, and even though we have an offer.. we're sold but not sold as the real estate agent tells us.. other people can still see our house and make offers, but the other guys have 48 hours to remove their conditions. Either way, it was asking price, so I really really hope that they do get it... it's all just up to their real estate agent in edmonton.. I'm totally crossing my fingers.. so my house is still spotless.. (can't believe that myself..) it needs the grass cut, and it needs a dusting.. but it's getting there... and my dumb neighbour just flicked all the dog poo from his dog off the grass infront of my house to the street in front of my house.. yeah.. they're really great neighbours.. won't be sad at all to get rid of them.. hope the next one's are nice.. I wonder what their like.. it would be good to talk to the current owners of the house and ask them what they think.. but you're not allowed to talk to the previous owners.. it's taboo.. too funny..

So the parties start next weekend... Hailey's Birthday kicks them all off.. Saturday at mom and dad's.. pretty excited... then the next weekend is Nicki's Bridal shower and a babtism for Jason's cousins' kids... and the weekend after is camping in rocky, then nothing planned, but I think Jason and I are going to go to the Rodeo because I've never been, and then the weekend after is jason's birthday, but we'll probably be packing because that next thursday we move, then that weekend we move thursday and friday, then Nicole's baby shower saturday, nicki's stagette sunday, the next weekend, paula's grad party and cathy's shower... the weekend after paula graduates and it's our 4 year anniversary, then the weekend after Nicki gets married. Then finallly we get to enjoy our new house a little... YAY.. sometime mid august... we'll see.. I think there's more.. I just don't remember.. what a summer.. totally busy already.. we'll see how it goes... maybe we can camp in september.. if we don't find more stuff to do... yeesh... have to email Lindsay this list.. keep forgeting..

just saw the house that holds the fate of my house selling, and its kinda funky.. it has red cabinets and crazy funky tile floor.. I hope someone likes it.. because I just don't know what I think of it.. and they are asking a lot of money for it.. I hope it sells I hope it sells... all I can do is hope.. The real estate agent says that we'll have lots of showings this weekend.. hopefully someone else loves it and they make an offer.. that would be great... but I'm not going to hold my breath.. hopefully the street sweepers come before then and clean up my neighbours dog poo so people don't think it's mine.. maybe I'll just wake up early and go out there and flick it towards their spot so it looks like it's theirs.. we'll see.. well I better go back to work and see i can't get a little more done before jason comes home.. that would be great.. I should go take something out to eat as well..

ok.. I'll talk to you all later..

me

The Going's On of Jo

2007-06-01T09:00:00.000-06:00

Well, about a week ago we thought we might be interested in looking at houses, you know.. hailey and chub get a bigger yard, Jay and I get a different space.. so we looked at one house last week, this week we looked at about 5, an voila! We bought a house.. yep.. put the offer in and got excepted on wednesday and our house is listed on the market today.. sorry.. not sure what the mls or anything is... and yeah.. the rest of my life is kinda snowballing from there...

I started back to work on monday.. it was kinda a crazy week considering I was going to list my house yesterday and had to get it perfectly clean.. crazy real esatate agent.. took me and jason monday, tuesday and wednesday, then mom came over yesterday for a good 5 hours and the three of us cleaned the whole time, then shawn and nicole came over for a minute to see what was going on and we ended up putting shawn to work... it was insane.. but my house is imaculate (forgive my spelling) ready to sell, and I hope it goes fast. We find out about whether or not we get our financing for the new one on monday... and I still managed to get Nicki's shower invites done and go to lindsay's graduation... so now paula's grad party is at my house... cool.. so my summer just got a little busier.... I move the same weekend that I 'm hosting Nicole's baby shower at her mom's and nicki's stagette.. should be a good weekend.. crazyness... good times had by all.. oh and my dad can't help me move because he's camping that weekend.. bugger.. oh well I guess I'll have to do it myself.. we'll see.. if anyone wants to help.. let me know.. I could use it... it's a thursday though so that I could fit all the other stuff in that weekend.. well we get possession on a thursday.. I guess we could move when ever...

ok.. what else?? hmmmm.. I dunno... sorry.. brains kinda fried.. hey... got a Wii... very excited about that.. going to get a new game for it tonight I think.. right now I only have Wii Sports.. fun none the less.. I'm practically a boxing champion.. giggles... well what else?? I think that's it for now.. I'm sure there's tons more, but I can't think of it, and they baby just woke up and I have a ton of work to do for my dad because I haven't really done a lot of that all week.. so I'll talk to you crazy kids later..

feel free to message me or comment.. I love comments..

me

Here we come Mexico!

2007-05-05T05:53:00.000-06:00

And we're off... We leave in, oh, 8 hours to get to mexico... I'm up early... it's about 6 am right now, and I've been up since about 4:30... so instead of laying in bed thinking.. I got up, made myself some tea, and I'm paiting my nails.. something that will no doubt not get done any other time because I still have to finish packing hailey's stuff...

Yes, we're gone for aweek.. I can't wait to get there.. uncle lawrence will be there in a couple hours.. and ironically enough on my itunes right now is a song called mexico that I downloaded the last time we went, only a few short months ago...

There's a guy standing across the street looking at me everyonce in a while probably wondering what any sane person would be doing up at this time on a saturday.. my body is wondering the same thing, but my mind knows.. I'm like a kid.. too excited to sleep.. and I had to pee... so alas.. here I am awake, unable to go back to sleep.. so if this blog is retarded you know why.. it's because I'm half a sleep, and my nails are drying.. good thing they're kinda short...

pause.. better go paint my toes again.. and grab my tea.. I'm sure it's done steeping...

*insert elevator music here....*

and I'm back... toes have a second coat... and the tea is steeped.. and I'm listening to 'It's a long way to the top (if you wanna rock and roll)' by jack black and some kids....

where was I??

uh.. no where.. that's good.. things have been pretty insane around here... between the motor home, and take-off's, and then I was trying to order some shirts and hats for dad, and some business cards for me and dad... it was hard... the business cards, and I was a total amature. The guys had to 'yell at me' because I forgot all kinds of things.. I think I fixed them, but I guess we'll find out when I get home...

The motorhome does look amazing thus far.. I should post those pics.. I'll try to remember... there are many things I'm trying to remember today.. hope I remember...

I would like to extend a congrats out to my cousin and his wife, as they are having their second baby.. and they couldn't be happier... I'm excited for them...

I thought I had more to say here.. so I appologize for the boring factor.. I can't think of anything now.. and I'm just typing to dry my nails.. *giggles* what a reason... I hope this sore throat goes away.. don't want a cold in mexico.. I'll get jay to pick up some cold fx when he goes to take the motorhome to kal tire...

oh, and thanks to shawn and nicole for watching chub and our house while we're gone.. I hope chub is good...

that poor guy is still sitting out there waiting for the bus.. it's been probably about 1/2 hour now.. and he's just sitting on a rock waiting on this chilly looking morning..

ok.. going to paint the second coat.. maybe I'll think of something really interesting to say..

brb...

ahh... there are now two guys across the street... the bus must be coming soon...

back to hand two...

correction.. the bus must have come.. it took me so long to type find and peck style, that they're both gone...

nope.. he's still there.. they just walked away..

hahahah.. the play by play of the bus stop... just what everyone wanted to read right now..

oh... gotta go... josh just signed in, and he's in vienna... so gonna see if I can say hi.. then go watch tv and let my nails dry...

bye for now faithfull readers....

On the Go

2007-04-07T21:49:00.000-06:00

A recent picture of me... figured an up-to-date one was required...

Hello Hello out there in Blog land... working on many things on this end.. how about you?? I'm working on getting in better shape.. Paula showed me a couple of things to do to build some muscles in the old core region that will tone my middle.. so that's cool.. I can do 20 sit ups right now.. and I can do well not sure how many girlie push-ups.. I did 15 the other day.. but today I could only do 7... oh well.. I'll work on it... I went on the eliptical on thursday and friday for 30 minutes.. today I took off because, well honestly I was going to go on it today and take tomorrow off because I figured it would be busy... but it just didn't work out that way.. so I might get up early tomorrow and go on the eliptical so that I'm still on my plan... I've been eating healthier, and much smaller portions then normal... as I seem to always eat really big portions.. (well I'm sure they're bigger then they should be) so I'm trying to get that in check... My plan is to lose well 10 pounds this month.. but 5 would be great too.. we'll see how it goes..

Mom and Dad want Jason and I to go back to mexico with them because they sold their house and they have money to go.. well so do we.. so they want to go to the resort we were at in January for a week at the end of the month.. nothing set in stone yet.. but we both really want to go... so I think we're going to.. we're trying to talk Jason's parents into going with us because they could really use a vacation... So hopefully they'll come and we'll go with both sets of parents.. it will be a really great time... So that's coming at the end of April I believe... So that's why I want to lose 10 pounds.. i'd feel alot better in my bathing suit 10 pounds lighter...

We're also hoping to work on our house... we want to put hardwood floors on the main floor, and sooner then later by the sounds of it.. Jason really doesn't like the flooring in our place.. so we'll change it out and he'll get over it... We're also working on the basement.. well Jason started framing it, and then we have a lot more to do.. so who knows when that will get done.. I think it's going to be a fall project.. yes.. that sounds good.. gives us a bit more time this summer to do what ever we want.. Which brings me to the motor home..

Jason's parents gave us that motor home and we're working on it.. I think right now it's ready to prime, and we have to put in some cupboards.. I have to get together with my grandma so we can sew the cushions... it's all good... Still haven't picked colours... and I don't think we have enough material to make the curtains.. but we'll see.. I'm not entirely sure...

There is a million other things going on.. but those are the one's happening first I believe..

oh! Hailey is starting swimming lessons on Monday.. that's exciting.. I can't wait.. she's going to love it... but if we leave when mom wants to, we'll miss her last lesson, and we already missed the first one.. oh well.. she'll get over it... Jason said he doesn't want an easter present.. he just wants to go to mexico.. so that makes that easy for me.. we're going to pick up a couple more mexican blankets for the motor home while we're there, and a doll for hailey because we lost her's that we got her last time on the way home, and some of those nice bowls.. I really liked them.. so I'm going to pick some up for myself.. probably just one.. but that's ok..

what else to share??? hmmm.. nothing I dont' think.. that was enough vortex for the rest of you.. I'm on Facebook.. I think that anyone reading this would know that.. because I think it's just Lindsay and Nicole K, so you guys are on there and know that I am too.. right now I'm watching the Calgary Edmonton game that a few minutes ago Calgary had to win, but now they dont' because colorado lost against nashville so Calgary is Automatically in the play offs...

hmm.. what else.. I think that's it.. i keep saying that and then I type more.. this is more for me then it is for you I think.. I really dont' have anything to do.. and Jason wants to watch/sleep through the rest of this game.. so I'm just sitting here waiting for it to end.. I should just go have a bath.. mmmmmm... a bath.. that would be nice.. well if I go on the eliptical tomorrow then I'll treat myself to a nice long bath and an episode of xena tomorrow night.. that will be nice.. ahhh...

ok.. gonna run now.. you're bored, I'm bored, and my wrists are sore from sitting in a funny postion on the couch to type this.. ciao for now..

me

Not Being Bummed...

2007-04-03T14:15:00.000-06:00

So, I'm not being bummed today...

I didn't meet my March Weight loss goal.. it was only 5 lbs.. but I left in the middle of march.. and I think that I might have gained during my time in Vancouver...

I was designing a webpage for an opera singer.. but she in not so flattering words, told me to stuff it, she hated my ideas.. and for a change.. I'm not exagerating... oh well... her loss.. kinda.. my loss.. cuz now i'm not getting paid.. oh well.. only put in a few hours of work.. Guess I should re-think the deposit deal... But she just hated what I was doing... and was tight for money all the sudden, so she gave me the boot... and wasn't even very nice about it...

I'm still in Vancouver.. which isn't a reason to be bummed.. it's beautiful here.. the sun is shining.. and the weather is pretty good.. not like calgary and all their snow... but I miss Jay, and Chub, and my home.. and my friends... and my life... and I really want to lose weight and get in better shape.. so I need to go home to do that.. it's not happening here... just don't want to...

the reno's look great.. that's why I'm here.. They really do.. besides putting the light back in.. the master ensuite is done.. yep.. all painted and everything.. I guess Uncle has a couple little touchups to do.. but nothing serious...

The Main bath is looking good too.. it's just that it has to be sanded again.. and then primed and then two coats of paint and some final tiles stuck down... and then and then and then.. yeah.. that list keeps going.. and I just don't want to be working on it any more... Jason's not here to keep me going.. I like working on projects with him.. but well pretty much all by myself because these guys have to work during the day and then are pretty tired by the time they get home.. and there isn't much time after they get home.. I end up doing a lot by myself... so I'm just sitting here.. not being bummed... not being lazy... and not not wanting to do anything... yeah.. that's working great...

I'm trying to think of a way to motivate myself into doing something.. but hey.. I did paint the bathroom... what more can they ask for.?? well priming and sanding and... I know the list...

I'm sure Hailey is either awake from her nap or going to be soon.. so I should probably go check on her... she'll want lunch...

what else?? hmmm... I dunno.. I'll get going..

ciao for now,
me

Workin in Vancouver..

2007-03-25T22:48:00.000-06:00

Aloha from the big Van City.. actually it's Langley.. I am mostly just posting a blog because I have a totally funny picture of Hailey an I had to share.. she's a drunk already.. totally my kid... uncle says he's going to send this picture to Social Services... too bad for her she can't figure out how to get the beer out.. oh well.. it's still funny..

the work is going well.. we should be done two bathrooms and a bedroom tomorrow or tuesday.. I guess probably tuesday... we'll see... well my hands are so dry so I have to go find some lotion.. talk to you guys later,
me

Off and Running.. Again

2007-03-19T15:34:00.000-06:00

Time for my weekly check in.. that just usually goes longer then a week.. *giggles*

Well new stuff to report... We were in Kananaskis this weekend. Yep, Winter Weekend fun... we went snow shoeing, played in the pool alot.. enjoyed the hot tub... watched a movie or two, did some drinking.. (something called an Irish Car Bomb.. a shot of Baileys and Irish Whiskey droped into a glass of Guiness... kinda gross.. but not totally stomache turning...) Green beers, St. Paddy's Day shinanigans... and other such fun... we were going to go ice skating.. but the ice was melted.. darn warm weather..
Good times had by all none the less...

Last week I exercised every single day... I was pretty proud of myself.. my goal is 5 pounds in March.. some how I don't think I'm going to make it.. but I'll keep at it and see what happens.. after my weekend of goofing off I didn't gain any weight.. so that has to be a good thing..

hmm.. what else to report.. the Ogden house is done.. YAY! no more going back there.. woo hoo...!!! and the motor home.. well not even close.. needs a lot more work.. the stereo is installed, the mechanical aspects are taken care of.. I bought the fabric for the cushions, I just have to sew it together, and we have the peel and stick tiles waiting to be installed. Infact, we have most of the pieces, we just have to put them together.. Jason has a little more prep work to do to the ceiling, and the cupboard to build and then we can paint the inside.. and after that it's easy... so yeah.. it's getting there.. just a little more to go still though.. we're working on it.. It will for sure be up and running may long weekend.. we are taking it then, cananda day long weekend and sometime in August.. and those are our for sure outtings in it this year.. but hopefully there are more.. Jason was hoping to take it out to bc or something.. somewhere with a lake and stuff.. maybe take a few days off and just go somewhere.. we'll see... you never know with us..

I leave tomorrow night for Vancouver.. Hailey and I that is.. We're helping Uncle Lawrence with his house.. I'll take before and after pics of everything we do.. so you can see that I was actually getting something done.. I'm pretty excited.. it should look really good when we're finished.. although I don't know what it looks like now.. but I've heard some stories.. and I hope I can make it look better.. we'll see.. so I leave tomorrow night and Jason comes up Friday night so that we can rip out his bathroom and redo it this weekend.. whole bathroom make over in a weekend.. should be good... I'm excited.. I think mostly we'll be painting and stuff.. but hopefully we get more done.. I'll keep you posted..
I guess i should update Hailey's website while I'm gone as well.. woo.. lots of things to do.. speaking of lots to do.. I have lots to do right now.. so I better get going.. ciao for now,
me

Just insanely Busy!!!

2007-03-05T10:10:00.000-07:00

I can't imagine when I ever had time for work!!!
I'm so crazy busy all the time.. or just crazy.. and I 'have nothing to do'! I can't believe it.. our latest project? Jason's parents gave us their old motor home. A 1977 Ford Triple E. It's little in the ways of motor homes but much bigger then our tent. It needs a lot of work.. well rather it didn't really need that much, but then we decided that we wanted it to reflect us, so well jason gutted the whole thing and we're pretty much starting from scratch.. crazy boy!!

So we're doing everything to it.. I'll keep you all posted and let you know how the progress goes.. as of tonight we are working on the roof and sealing it up, and then Tom is coming to work on the stereo and tyler is going to work on the engine and all those parts.. so yes, very very busy..

so I'll post a few before pictures and you guys can watch the transformations.. ciao for now,
me

keep in mind these are after jason has already ripped apart the roof... It looked better before.

Ciao,
me

Grown up? Or just pretending?

2007-02-07T18:42:00.000-07:00

I'm guessing that I'm supposed to be a grown up now. You know, responsible, mature, organized, put together... and I'm not so sure that I am.. infact.. I'm 100% I'm not.. But I have a baby now to take care of.. you would think that something in my brain would just click and all the sudden I'd be a 'Parent'! Unfortunatley... that's not how this all worked. Nothing clicked, nothing is figured out, she's almost 8 months old and I still have no idea what I'm doing. I'm totally faking it... I mean, she's turning out pretty good so far as far as I can tell, but what if she finds out I don't have any of the answers, I don't know what I want to do when I grow up, and my room is still a mess.. Parents have clean bedrooms.. it's just how it works.. I think... at least that's how it always seems to work... How can I instill these things in her. She'll never believe me.. she'll think grandparents are always that way, but parents are a wreck.. well at least hers is... I'm totally an imposter.. and yes, this is what's going through my head right now.. just a whole lot of non sense.. I have so many things on my mind.. (so I guess in that sense I'm a grown up) money, house work, vacations, Hailey, chores, goals, dreams, what I'm going to do when mat leave is over.. so many things... so little brain space... it's very crowded in there.. oh and don't forget weight loss, getting in better shape, the whole self image thing and the entire self esteem issue.. Like I said.. totally crowded in there..

It's funny, when ever I'm overwhelmed, stressed, or what ever I always calm myself down by writing.. yes.. in school I'd take a peice of paper and just write what ever was on my mind.. which usually doesn't make any sense but I did it, and then at work I would do the same, just pretend to be working, when I'm on the computer I just open up a new document and just type away, and this time that's exactly what I'm doing, except that you are all here to see it.. although I think I've lost anyone that actually reads this, so it's still the same thing... *giggles* go me.. what else to write about..???

hmm... well Mexico rocked. And Cathy's getting married. Nicki might get proposed to and Paula's a cop. Shawn and Nicole are having a baby, Nat and Laurie want to have a baby. Jason's parents are trying to finish their own house so they can sell it and build a different house (it looks like it will probably have an indoor pool.. very excited about that) and my parents are trying to finish their 'flip' house. I'm considering going to work for my dad when mat leave is over.. actually that seems to be the way things are going, which is cool.. I can take Hailey with me.. and I am starting to websites again.. which is cool.. I actually like doing it.. who would have thought.. *giggles* it always comes back to the websites.. you can see what I've done.. www.artbyloretta.com and www.michelleminke.com yeah.. that's me.. I'm doing another one right now, and have leads on 1 for sure at least consultation, and 2 possibles... very exciting..

well criminal minds is on, so I have to go..

ciao,
me

More Hailey Pictures

2007-01-11T15:26:00.000-07:00

So it's been a little while since I've been here. So I thought I'd drop in and let everyone know what's going on.

Hailey's doing great. Sitting is so easy for her now... she's a sitting pro.. and she's got to the point where she can get up on her hands and knees and rock back and forth, but no crawling yet... so far she gets around by pushing herself backwards with her hands.. and she spins really well.. it's funny... I gave her a sippy cup for the first time today.. she's not sure what she thought of it.. she thought it was weird when she sucked on it and got water... but she didn't know how to do it on her own.. she could get it in her mouth but didn't figure out that she had to tip it up no matter how many times I tried to show her.. it was pretty funny... She's eating quite a bit now, Chicken, Beef, Peas, Beans, Sweet Potatoes, Bananas, Apples, Pears, and of course pablum. She's getting better with the chicken.. still when we try her on something new she gags and makes faces the first couple of times, but she's getting much better.. and eating a lot more.. at first it was just a few little spoonfulls... but now, she could probably eat a third of a jar or almost that much.. it depends on how she's feeling and what it is... I guess just like the rest of us...

I've been really sick. I got a cold last week, and I just can't seem to shake it, so I've been kinda taking it easy this last couple of days trying to get better as we leave for mexico a week from this saturday.. can't wait.. so excited!!! Just learned that LJ's plane gets in to Mexico about the same time ours does so that works out great.. he won't be on his own when he gets there... That's going to be one long day.. our plane leaves calgary at 6 in the morning.. so we have to be there at 4 in the morning.. meaning we have to leave sometime just after 3, and we have to get up sometime around 1 or 2... oh god.. that's going to be so eary.. totally not dressing hailey for that.. I'll put clothes in the diaper bag, but she can wear pj's on the plane.. she'll never notice...
I had this whole totally crazy 11 day plan of what I was going to do before we got to mexico to get in better shape and lose some weight.. but yeah.. got sick the very next day.. so now, nothing.. especially since this is one of those annoying colds that knocks you right on your butt... hate that... feeling a bit better.. but still got the sniffles.. grr....

I'm sure I've already asked this, but any ideas about what I should do with the rest of my life?? I'm really curious here? I'm totally baffled.. Back to Sovereign, on to something new? Paula said she could get me a job as a legal secretary.. do I want to try that for a while?? What is it that I want to do?? Too many options I think.. I think about this all the time, and I'm running out of time.. only 3 1/2 more months to figure it out.. well at least whether or not I'm going to go back to Sov... hmmm.. better get on that..

well I think that's all I have to report.. of course new Hailey pictures.. that's a given with the title.. I guess I could start putting pictures of something else up here, but why... the only reason anyone checks here is to see Hailey pictures anyways..

ok.. talk to you later,
me

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2007-01-02T09:00:00.000-07:00

And it's 2007.

So what's your New Years' Resolution?? Mine is to not make any more Resolutions. They never get done.. the thing you resolve to do on January 1 is always the thing you never do.... At least that's my theory as I've been losing 10 lbs since I've been making resolutions and have yet to lose that darn 10 lbs..

So of course the new year brings thoughts of bettering myself, being more organized, getting in better shape, all the things that will be 'different' this year. We'll see how far that goes. Hoping things go well, but pretty sure it's not because I resolved for it at midnight... so yes, as you can tell, I'm totally not into the whole resolutions thing... if you are, i'd love to hear about your resolutions, and if you have in the past actually made them happen. Maybe mine should be to watch 100 movies or something.. I'm sure I watch a few over the year.. a hundred can't be that hard.. that's only two a weekend.. *giggles* ok.. that's a lot of movies..

I hope everyone had a great Christmas! We did, Hailey learned to sit up Christmas eve, and so that made things that much more fun Christmas day. She got a ton of toys, and clothes and everything. Jason got a giant remote control Hummer, and I got a gameboy and an artist eisel. I'm very excited. I cant' wait to start painting. Right after I get everything else finished.. so much to do.

I've been thinking alot of what I'm going to do when my mat leave is over.. as that is quickly sneaking up on me.. Yeah, as my mom pointed out, I have only 5 more months and then it's back to work.. so we'll see.. I'm totally confused as to what to do? Do I go back to my old job and see if I like it any better? Do I go back to my old company and a new position? Do I get something completely different? Do I stay home and see if I can't make the website thing work? Who knows. So many things to think about and I don't want to leave this until the last minute. Jason thinks I had things pretty good at Sovereign, so I should go back there, but is Insurance really for me? I'm not really a big fan of it... it's not what I always wanted to do, so it's really hard to say what I'm going to do. Cathy and her work could find me something else. I think Cathy's still pulling for me to find something at CJAY our local radio station.. but I'm really torn. Sovereign is a good place to work, and it's totally reliable, and I don't have to try to get a job there, it's already there and waiting. On the other hand, there are so many jobs out there right now, especially in Calgary, why go to one that isn't even something I really want to do???? So many choices.

But right now, I have to get Hailey and get her ready to go. Have to take the Durango in and get it fixed.. the last of my warranty and then I have to pay for repairs..

ok.. I'll talk to you all soon..

me

Why is it?

2006-12-15T00:11:00.000-07:00

More Pictures of Hailey!!!

Everyone says that Christmas is the 'Most Wonderful Time of the Year!' Then why is it year after year I find my self stressing about it? Why can't I just enjoy it like everyone else?? That's my resolution next year.. to enjoy the Whole Christmas Season... not to stress about it... I can do.. it's gonna be hard.. but meh.. it can be done..

I think it's because I'm somewhat of a perfectionist when it comes to certain things. I get an idea in my head and then it has to be that way. My Christmas cards, and my christmas letter. What kind of baking I'd like to do.. and there's just so many little hands on things that I love to do all year round that I decide have to ALL be done in the month of december which usually turns out to be the 2nd and 3rd weeks in December stressing me out to the hilt! What a duffuss.. you'd think I'd catch on.. but I'm the same way when I do anything as all of you know. I seem to have a need to get all worked up over things I think are important... I am insane!

So what are the rest of you doing for the holidays? I know a couple people are coming home for the holidays. And I got to see one already, hopefully the other that I'm thinking of contacts me so we too can visit... (this means you Josh)

I was visiting with Nicole Kobie yesterday, and we were talking.. (obviously or it would have been a boring visit) and I realized that I really do talk to and generally keep in touch with many of my highschool friends. And some people that I wans't necissarily 'friends' with in highschool but I knew them, are actually some of my closer friends now.. Cathy for instance.. we knew eachother in highschool, we hung out in the same crowd, but neither of us could have called the other a real friend.. more of aquaintences... well maybe more then that... but you know what I mean... but now.. well we went to maui together last week, we worked together.. she was the Maid of Honor at my wedding.. strange how that happens.. it's all good though.. wouldn't trade any of it..

And last night I was talking with Nicole and my mom (this is Nicole Barr now) over supper and they were saying how many kids' worst memories are from elementary. Not me my friends.. mine was totally jr high... the whole three years.. in Edmonton and Calgary.. it was brutal! Hated Jr High, that would be the three years of my life I'd erase... I'm sure all of you have those times in your life.. what years would you erase?

Ahhh.. Chub barking.. doesn't he know it's almost 12:30am... oh crap.. better get going to bed before Hailey is getting up.. gonna be a tired day tomorrow.. and we have Jay's christmas party, and Wade's Birthday party.. and Hailey's 6 month shots... oh goodness.. going to be a busy day tomorrow..

Just one last thing.. I'd like to report that my friend Paula, some of you know her and some don't, was just told today that she doesn't have to do the interview part of her application to get into the Calgary Police because she did so Great last time that they figured she didn't need to do it again! She totally aced it two years ago.. and she's done everything they asked her to do in the last two years and more.. so she's a total shoe in.. (I hope I'm not jinxing her by saying this.. but I'm so darn excited for her!!) I am so excited.. she was told it would probably take another 6 months before she found anything out, and mind you there's still a number of steps to go through.. she's on her way and it's going way faster then expected.. since her interview was scheduled for Jan 20 and now she's all the way to the psyche exam on december 20th!!!

GO PAULA!! I'm so happy for you!!!

ok.. really have to finish this walmart picture upload thing and then go to bed.. I'm really tired..

nite all ...
me

Maui!!!

2006-12-11T08:46:00.000-07:00

Ok, so that was totally awesome.. there was tons of room on all the flights, so the buddy passes worked out great because there was no way we were getting bumped... The flights themselves weren't too bad. Not very impressed with the Maui Airport, but it's a small price to pay for a crazy good vacation. Only 4 days total, and so much fun. We saw hula dancing, we sat on the beach, went to the ocean, tried the 'best pizza on the island' saw about 4 different towns/villages/cities what ever they're considered over there... we sat at the pool, we went to the mall, bought a whole whack of souveniers, and Hailey got her picture taken with Hawaiian Santa.. oh god it's funny, I'm totally posting it up here. Gotta figure out how to get that Kodak picture gallery thing working for me so I can post more pics.. I have probably over 100 from Hawaii, but I won't post them all...

Hailey was great. On the way home she was pretty cranky for the first couple of hours of the first flight, but she fell asleep and then she was her usual little great self...

speaking of which she starts real food this weekend (the 16th, so we're gonna see if we can't do the pablum thing every day this week so saturday she can try something else..
so I'll be right back I have to go see if she'll eat it..

hold please..
(insert cheesy christmas music here)

ok... so did a lot in that little break. Might have another shot at a different web page.. go me.. this is cool.. hopefully it keeps up.. and I can make a little extra cash on the side.

So as for Maui.. it was totally awesome.. things here are great too.. Had Greed Fest on Saturday.. more people showed up then I thought which was an awesome surprise.. I thought there were only going to be 6 of us total, and we had a dinner party instead, but there was 10 of people including Jason and I.. it was a great time.. did the present thing, and then played some donkey kong bongos.. it was so much fun.. Got to see Candice and Melaina.. that was great.. I've hardly seen them since I left Sovereign..

our house is already for Christmas, and I even have some of my christmas shopping done. Still have more to do, but oh well, at least I'm started on it..

I think that's all there is to report.. there's only about 5 more weeks till mexico.. (look at me.. just got back from one vacation and already looking forward to the next one. Crazy!) We're all crazy busy, and I hope to see many of my 'long distance' friends over the holiday season.

I'll talk to you all son.. Merry Christmas!

me

just a quick note!

2006-12-04T21:55:00.000-07:00

Hey,

so we're really going to Maui.. Cathy and I leave tomorrow morning.. Our flight leaves at 11:45, we'll be at the airport by 8:30 an and then we'll be in Maui by 10:30pm maui time.. so darn excited!! can't wait.... 3 days of lounging, relaxing, chillin with Cathy and Hailey by the pool....

but I really can't talk, because we just booked all this a few hours ago, and I still have to finish laundry, dishes, make formula, pack, shave, shower and be ready for 7:30 tomorrow morning... it's gonna be an insane long night, and then an even more insane long day tomorrow.. but at least this way, there's very little anticipation...

ok.. running... gotta go..

a million things to do..

me

holly shoot!

2006-12-04T15:23:00.000-07:00

I might actually get to use the buddy passes we got for westjet. Since most don't know the on going saga of the buddy passes, here's the 'coles' notes version (I'm too funny) well, we got some buddy passes for westjet to fly anywhere westjet flies.. there have been several plans about what to do with the tickets ranging from Vancouver to Honalulu, and everything has fallen through. I was supposed to go by myself, then with jason's mom, maybe my mom, jason, tom, nicki, and now Cathy might be the saving grace! She might be able to get the time off and go with me.. if she does.. we leave tomorrow. yep.. total spur of the moment thing... there are avaiable seats, there are hotels avaiable.. we just have to book everything and go.. can't wait.. hope she can get the time off.. and fill the one postion she has to fill for a temp job... so if any of you wanna temp this week... let cathy know now so we can go to Maui... yep.. that's right.. if she can fill that one spot.. we're going to maui, and we leave tomorrow.. it's a great opportunity.. figure the whole thing with flight, hotel and food should cost us about $500 can't believe how cheep that is to go to maui.. and we'll be sitting on the beach sometime tomorrow night.. Maui here we come..

So I know I'm a sucker for punishment.. because I'm getting my hopes up.. and my hopes have been up and dashed about a million times with these darn tickets, but lets just say if she can't make it for some reason, I'm still going to Fort Lauderdale, and I'm still leaving tomorrow.. and that's that.. I'm going somewhere.. and Fort Lauderdale has cheeper hotels, so it will cost the same as if I were sharing a room in Hawaii.. except I'll be in Florida.. either way.. works for me.. if I go to florida... hopefully I can go see Nasa.. that would be the coolest thing ever... we'll see...

what else to report.?? uh nothing on the home front.. Greed fest is this coming saturday, so I hope everyone rsvp's and everyone has a good present Idea.. I think so far only Shawn, Nicole, Tom and Paula are coming besides jason and myself.. so hopefully more come.. or it will be over really quick.. oh well..

better get running.. have to check in with cathy, see if she filled that spot and see if we're going to Maui.. I hope she can come.. this will be so much fun... I'm so excited.. and I really think with her it will be a million times more fun then by myself..

can't wait..
ok. I'll keep you posted as to what happens.. mean while.. go see.. www.artbyloretta.com I made that website for Lindsay's mom.. and I'm pretty proud of it.. pretty soon you'll also be able to go see Michelle Minke's website.. I'll let you know when it goes up.. ciao for now,
me

Hailey Today!

2006-11-30T13:29:00.000-07:00

So the pictures of Hailey are of today.. just a few minutes ago... and the other pictures are of the resort that we are going to in January. In Nuevo Vallarta Mexico.. I can't wait.. with the payment made today... it's all official.. it's all ready we just have to wait for the trip.. and it's coming sooner and sooner... we can't wait...

ok... here's the rest of the blog and I'm off to see what hailey is squeaking about..

Hailey is growing like crazy. She's rolling over, front to back and back to front.. She laughs so much, she's catching on to the whole sitting thing... it's going great... she's figuring it out a bit. She loves spending time with her grand parents, and actually anyone who wants to spend time with her. Her best friend is Chub. They're so cute! I just thought I'd put some new pictures of her up here.. what she looks like today... and a couple of her and her cousins from her Uncle Greg's birthday...

Jason and I aren't going to Ontario any more... I'm sad, but I guess we can't have everything.. and I was getting a little carried away. The cost was just going up and up and up.. and so we figured it was best to try to go another time and not go now.. so yeah.. we're not going to go.. I am unemployed and we are going to mexico.. I guess it's just time to start pretending I'm a grown up, and realize that sometimes you can't have what you want.. it's all good.. I'm sure in the spring I'll go down there like I was planning and see his family then.. it all works out in the end...

What else is new? As a result of not going we are going to the Rockin' R&D company christmas party. It would have been my only year missed.. I've been to all of them.. so I'm kinda glad I'm not missing it... it will be fun.. A fancy steak house, a few games of pool and some drinks at dad's... it all works out great..

Next weekend is the Return of Greed Fest! I'm so excited.. although right now, as far as I know, Shawn and Nicole are the only people coming for usre.. no one has RSVP'd.. I guess I shouldn't be surprised.. so if you are reading this please know that (assuming I know you) you too are invited.. it's a great time.. just email me for the details.. it will be awesome.. Good times had by all!

I think that's about all we have to say... I'm thinking of putting up my chrismtas decorations this weekend.. and I already have my christmas cards ready to go.. I just have to get stamps and then seal them.. it's all good.. this is the most prepared I've been ever.. and i'm going to make a gingerbread mansion.. except it won't be out of gingerbread, it's going to be made of rice krispies! I'm so excited.. I'll be sure to post pictures..

ciao for now folks..

me

I'm Officially 25!!!

2006-11-23T10:31:00.000-07:00

And who woulda thunk it... thought someone would kill me long before this because of that big mouth of mine.. *giggles*
Go Jo! and I'm practially a wiz on this new 'puter of mine... making my own short-cuts, getting webpages made.. I rock!!

hey... did I already mention that if anyone knows how to play a song on the guitare I would be really greatful if you taught it to me.?? Not sure, didn't get any response out of that... oh well I'll just have to show greg that I know nothing and get him to show me a song.. he's really good, just when it comes teaching.. he likes to start at the end and then gets a little frustrated when you just don't get it.. kinda like jason and skiing.. (just point your toes together and go down the hill... *ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh*) yep, that was my ski lesson from jay! Hopefully this year we can go out at least once and then we can try it again.. bunny hill here I come!!!

One day I'm going to be great at something.. anything.. not sure what it is yet.. but something... just one thing... Go Jo!!

yes.. I'm practically G.I. Joe, that's why I keep saying Go Jo.

Well as you can tell I really have nothing to share today and I don't even think I have any new pictures, so Im' gonna go now! ciao,
me

Happy Birthday Eve to Me!!

2006-11-21T20:17:00.000-07:00

What is going on in my life.. obviously if you're checking in here, that's what you're wondering.
Well, it's my birthday tomorrow.. yep... a whole Quarter century old! Can you believe that! I'm so excited.. Bring on the Crisis!! Yes, there's more then just the commonly heard of mid life crisis, there is also the less commonly heard of Quarter life Crisis. And since I plan on living till at least 100.. that's what I'm going to blame everything on this year.. yep.. a whole year of quarter life crisis for me.. how cool hey...

so for my birthday, jason threw me a party.. it took a big fight, a lot of tears, and some minor threats, but he did good.. He should have started planning it long ago, at least two or three weeks ago, but he waited till the last possible minute and then christmas season is already upon us so everyone's already booked for party's and weekends away... so we threw together a last minute shindig at my parents house.. (pics to follow, if i can get this stinking program to work for me.. ) It was awesome though.. good turn out... some old faces, some new one's.. one from Jr High that I thought I had left there but seems to come out of the blue everyonce in a while to remind me of what a miserable time that was... Jason rented a hot tub, we played some pool, there was a lot of drinking.. and cake, and champagne... and presents.. yep.. got presents.. thought I was past that part of my life.. but glad I'm not... got some spa gift certificates, and a promise for a spa day with two of my gal pals... (right before we go to mexico, what perfect timing..) , booze, booze and more booze... fly tying stuff (can't wait to use all that.. gonna make me a ton of flies for next spring..) uh.. an aerosmith dvd/cd combo and some guitare strings (didn't know you were supposed to change those even if you hardly played it.. they get wrecked all by themselves.. but I have strings from last year.. are they still good.. really have to learn to play a song on there.. if anyone knows how to play a song on the electric guitare.. you should send me directions so I can impress my brother in law and make him not regret buying me my red guitare last year that I totally love!!) Really have to learn to play that.. and Jason got me a brand new mac pro laptop.. yep.. my own lap top.. totally psyched!! feeling a bit dumb because I am having problems figuring out how to work it.. but I'm sure at somepoint it's going to sink in.. can't believe it..

so yeah.. other then that.. not much is new.. not going on a cruise.. not sure if I talked about that on here, but that's just no happening.. it was going to.. but nope.. Jason and I are going to Ontario on the 1st of december.. again.. can't remember if I talked about that, so I won't talk too long about it..

oh I had food poisoning on Saturday night.. well I guess technically it was sunday morning.. yeah.. about 1am till about 11ish am, that's how long I was physically ill to the point of vomiting, but after that it was just a lot of, oh god I wish I would die so I don't have to feel like this any more.. and then eventually yesterday I worked my way up to eating an entire eggo waffle (not healthy I know, but we didn't have any bread so I had to deal with what I had..) and today I'm right back onto solid foods again! GO JO.. right in time for my birthday..

and so yeah.. been working on my sites.. I'll be sure to post Loretta's site as soon as it's done.. (that's lindsay's mom) it should hopefully be done friday.. that's what I'm aiming for.. maybe a bit of tweeking left, but mostly done..

and then hopefully only another couple of weeks till Michelle's is up and running.. that one shouldn't take nearly as long because it's not nearly as content rich..

ok.. well I guess I bette get to work.. have to figure out how to work my photoshop... hopefully josh is almost home and he can help me... he's a life saver.. I have a few of those when it comes to this computer.. Nicki, Court, Josh.. my fav people to go to for advice on how to work this darn computer.. But I totally love it..

*giggles*

lets see if we can get some pictures up here.. I know that's what you're really here for.. pictures of Hailey..

ciao for now,
me

Oops.. I did it again!

2006-11-13T20:34:00.000-07:00

I played with your head, forgot to update my blog in a million years.

So updates... Well, my birthday is exactly 8 days away. November 22... it's the big Quarter Century! I'm so excited.. I just about got a cruise for my birthday and Christmas, but that fell through. I did however get a laptop! Yep that's right.. Jason ordered me a Mac Book Pro.. so excited.. can't wait for it to get here, should be wednesday, I think right now it's in Alaska.. (crazy fedex..) I received the carrying case and the wireless mouse today and jason and I went and picked up the wireless router so I'm so excited!! Can't wait.. hopefully I don't die of excitement before it gets here.. I can't die.. too many things to do tomorrow..

I'm working on a website.. yep that's right.. it seems that my life always comes back to this darn website thing.. so I'm doing it.. actually I'm really enjoying it.. and I'm going to enjoy it all the more once I get my new lap top.. I'm gonna be so excited!!!! can't wait!!! anyways.. yeah.. making a website for lindsay's mom, she's an artist, she paints and so Im' making her site.. it's gonna be great. And then I'm making one for a friend from high school.. she's an opera singer, so it will be equally as cool.. I guess I've only really done site for the more artistic side of things.. which is fun... I really have to get working on my own website.. I guess it's kinda funny a web designer with no website... crazy girl! Soon.. I think I'm going to call my company JC Squared... not sure if I'm gonna spell out squared or just put the little 2... have to figure that out still.... but I think it's cool... nothing definite yet... I'll post the links to the sites once I have them finished.. and you can all tell me what you think....

well.. what else... Hailey is almost sitting on her own now.. she does for a couple of minutes and then forgets what she's doing and falls over sideways or strait forward.. or does the old straiten the body out and try to hit your head really hard trick... so far so good though.. one more month till solid food.. actually we're debating on starting her on pablum now or later.. we'll see.. I think for now it's just gonna be the formula.... she rolled over from her back to her front for the first time on wednesday.. it was pretty exciting... she's been so close for about 3 weeks now that I thought she'd do it, but she finally took that plunge and just did it.. it was great.. (ok.. that was a cheesy mom story, too bad... I'm a cheesy mom I guess) hmm.... what else?? got her the cutest little christmas dress today... she'll look great.. stay tuned for pictures...

uh.. I think that's it.. oh, Jason and I are planning on going to Ontario to see his family the weekend of the 1st of December.. pretty excited about that.. Hailey will get to meet her Great Nana, and Jason's Aunt's and Uncles and cousin's and stuff.. should be a great time.. I'm totally psyched about that too..

I found an outfit to wear to all these christmas parties... I'm pretty excited about that.. finally for the first time in forever had a good shopping experiance.. with people telling me how amazing I looked and how I was silly for wanting to change.. of course they were bigger then me.. and that's the same speech I've given everyone of my friends that I want to be like... so I guess it's all relative to your way of thinking and people can't help but give you that speech... oh well, made me feel better...

well Jason's waiting to watch a movie, and he'll be sleeping in a few minutes anyways.. so I guess I better go and let him watch the first few minutes at least..

so ciao for now, I'll see i can leave you with some new Hailey pics..

ok.. so it says that it uploaded them.. not sure where the heck the went.. want to say a few choice words about this terrible blogger.com can't believe that every time I try to add my bleeping pictures it says that it bleeping worked and the I get bleep all!!! what the BLEEP!!! how frustrating.. if anyone has any advice, please pass that along.. if not.. well too bad.. no new hailey pics.. I'm getting off of here!

I don't have the patience right now to add the bleeping pictures 50 000 bleeping times!!!
how frustrating!!
bye
me

whoa... that was a long time

2006-10-26T22:57:00.000-06:00

I haven't been on here in ages!!! You're totally right Lindsay... I'm sure that anyone that was checking in on this.. has given up.

Well, here's a quick update on my life because I'm tired and I'm going to go to bed.. (after reading a little 'The Devil Wears Prada'.

Hailey's growing like a weed (is there anyother saying then that?). She's a whopping 13 lbs now and 25 inches tall.. go her!!

She giggles, smiles, puts everything in her mouth, pushes herself up on her arms when she's on her belly, likes to stand and loves to bounce (jolly jumper or anyone's arms will do). She's discovered her feet, and now they're in her mouth too. She knows her hands and babbles a lot, and figured out that the noises are coming from her, so she makes this little squeally noise and then smiles when you look at her and make a face... mischevious smile I tell you.... I'm gonna be in trouble with this one... but so far so good.... she's well behaved, cute and sleeps like an angel.... yeah.. I'm pretty spoiled with her... and love her to pieces!! And so does everyone else!!

Saw the Sovereign-ites today.. yeah.. stopped by the office, was supposed to have lunch with them but Brewster's doesn't allow minors.. duh it's a bar.. why didn't I think of that when they told me that's where they were going so that I didn't waste half my day going down there for nothing.. oh well had lunch with nicki which was great, and then made an appearance at the office because I was already down there, and that was the original reason... and again everyone loves hailey.. I think I just gained about 30 babysitters... great... now all I need is somewhere to go...

So the whole office is different... that's crazy... so many new people.. hardly any one that was ther when I was there.. freaks me out.. didn't change that much the two and a half years I was in that office, I'm gone for 4 months and it's like an 80% turn over rate.. insane!!

life is hectic as always, still exercising and to my dismay for no reason @#$&*!!! oh well.. so this week, I took the week off.. not thinking about what I'm eating, drinking or doing.. exercised once, eating like shit, and I"m actually a pound lighter then usual!! what a @#$&*!!!! yes.. great at maintaining a weight.. terrible at losing any.. but Nicole says I'm a loser with a capital L so I'll be fine before mexico.. glad one of us thinks that.. cuz it sure ain't me...

oh well.. three more months till mexico, and this weekend is write off because it's the 2nd annual joie and jay halloween eeeekstravaganza.... and I have a whopping 12 people showing up.. gave a fair amount of notice.. but I guess last year wasn't as great as everyone said it was because not very many people seem to want to come... a bit bugged by that.. but oh well.. I'll make the best of it, and everyone will leave again saying they had a great time and next yeat I'll have 6 people there.. me, jay, shawn, nicole, tom and paula... seems to be the theme...

ok... so what else can I bellyache about.. I'm totally whiney because... well I already told you.. I'm having a bad week.. the whole thing as a whole has just been really crappy.. and it doesn't help that i"m being a whiner and I'm pms-ing.. which is probably the cause for it all.. but oh well I dont' care.. and if you're still reading.. neither do you....

I guess that's all I can really update.. oh, I'm making a website for lindsay's mom, yeah.. really excited about that.. she's an artist.. should be a lot of fun.... speaking of lindsay, let me be the one to officially announce it.. (he met the family, so it has to be official by now and besides, who reads this anyways, I'm not really announcing it to anyone) Lindsay and Danny are dating.. yes Lindsay Lindsay, and Danny Danny, my best friend and my Brother... it's great.. they're totally having fun, and they seem to be happy, so I wish them both the best, and if things go sour, boy am I going to have to listen to a lot of complaining!! just jokin kids.. I luv ya both and hope it stays fun.. (so dont' get married.. tends to get a bit more boring after you get married.. and I don't even think it's the getting married part.. I think it's the being together for 8 years part that puts a damper on things.. but they might spice up sooner or later) here I talk like a seasoned vetran.. and my parents have been together for 25 years and jay's parents for 32? something like that.. now that's impressive... so when I get to 25 and 32 year anniversary's, I'll look back at this and think.. yeah.. I knew what I was talking about.. *giggles* if only I didn't love him so much hey?? what would I do??

my jay... he's great... a little sleepy, and pretty crazy when he's had a couple of wobbly pops, but means the best and tries... well sometimes tries really hard... but totally sweet.. and taken with me oddly enough.. so I better keep him...

and he makes cute kids...

ok.. well I better get going. now it's been well a whole 8 minutes and I'm exhausted.. so sorry kids, I'll have to leave you at that.. sure I could babble on forever.. but you'll all be celebrating 100th birthday's by the time you finish reading this novel anyway..

ciao for now

me

and you get no new pics because I've tried three times and they aren't here and I'm tired for fighting with this thing.. so I'm giong to bed!

Stranded..

2006-09-19T12:24:00.000-06:00

Well yesterday we didn't go anywhere because we were taking a day off... but today we're not going anywhere because the boys left with all the keys... so we're stranded... yep that's right... 'We are, Stuck in White rock with you!' craziness...

Watching Oliver twist on TV. I think I'd like to read this book.. and someday I will... Hailey's napping and I'm just chatting on MSN... good things that some can still chat during the day...

Gonna go do the dishes soon... I know I vacation pretty wild and crazy hey...

Nicole Kobie, send me your blog address.. I'm not at home and I can't add it on here until I figure it out..

ok.. I'll talk to you all later, if you see me on MSN say hi because I'm bored..

me

Hailey's first trip to Seattle, and other pic's!

2006-09-17T21:01:00.000-06:00

Hailey in White rock in the Rain...

Hailey at Stanley Park.. giving us directions because we weren't impressed with LJ's navigation skills...

Hailey... #1 Seahawks fan! Her new fav player!

Hailey and Uncle Lawerence...

Starting her off Young!!

Now Hailey has been to Seattle. We went, we shopped, we had starbucks, and we came home.. the boys got some Seahawk gear, and Hailey will be wearing her new jearsey at least till play offs... every sunday for the rest of the 06 season at least... and beyond until it doesn't fit...

We got Jason some sandals with bottle openers on the bottom... He's gonna be so excited... I didn't get anything... oh actually I lied.. I got bath and body works stuff... I can't believe it.. but Cathy got me hooked so now every time I go I stop, and sometimes I get other people to pick me up stuff.. it's crazy..I'm turning into a girl... oh well..

not much else to report.. I was just on here last night pretty late... Hey I was the one driving in Seattle, I thought I'd be nervous.. but it's just like Calgary and Deerfoot.. except they're stacked... no problemo... it was great.. I can drive anywhere now man.. I have confidence...

We're watching Lucky Number Sleven now, and my parents said it's good so I'll go watch it...

ciao.. I"ll put more pics on tomorrow, we're taking a day off.. maybe we'll walk down the million stairs and have a green tea by the ocean, but that's it.. Hailey needs a day off.. it's been a bit much for her..

me!

Here we go again.. or still....

2006-09-17T00:26:00.000-06:00

Tomorrow.. (very nearly today) we go to seattle.. The boys are going to a football game that starts at 1 so Hailey and I are going shopping in the states... I think it'll be fun.. I'm quite excited.. the boys are going to pick some parephenalia up for me from the stadium. I was thinking of going to try to find more sights, but I don't know how courageous I'll get.. I think I might stick to the mall... maybe find a place to sit down and have a coffee.. don't want to get lost... don't think I will, but you never know...

Today was great, we went to Fort Langley.. fun little shops and a nifty little dinner... had an Elvis Burger with nacho's.. and a cherry shake.. the whole reason for going there.. and if any of you are there (fort langley) in the future, the little cafe with the sign that says 'beer gardens open all day' it lies.. they close beween lunch and supper... we found that out the hard way... I was in an antique shop and got high.. well pretty darn close... and then another antique shop that was so huge, I needed LJ to help me find the way out..

things have been great... hanging with the guys.. going to the beach for supper... today LJ drove me home.. he's practicing for his driving test that is week from monday... I hope he passes, but I think it might be a close one... he's good, but hasn't taken any driver training so I think there are things that his dad and I just can't remember to tell him that might affect how he does... fingers crossed that everything works out good...

Hailey is great.. laughing more.. and smiling all the time.. (it's not really a laugh but a giggle, too funny none the less) and today we were growling at eachother.. I love it.. it was so cute.. she was making a growling noise so I made it back and then she copied me.. I was laughing so hard.. she's hallarious...

Yesterday we were at stanley park.. a bit of a rip off that aquarium.. 20 bucks to walk around for an hour and a half.. and we took our time.. but that was all there was to see... it took us longer to find the place (stanley park, not the aquarium that was easy) yeah.. 2 hours one way.. it's a bit a jaunt from here...

I was going to walk up the million stairs tonight after supper, but the boys didn't want me going on my own... but the pilates is going good.. I've done pilates 3 times since I've been here.. I"m pretty impressed with myself.. it's easy when you hang out with these two, they've been doing so much that they want to sleep in (till 10 but sleeping in still) so I have time in the morning where hailey hangs out in the jolly jumper and I can do my pilates with out interuption..

next week is going to be way less eventful, they work monday, then it's monday night football so we can't go anywhere during that (uncle lawrence says, lj says they're crappy teams he can miss it.. so the two of us might leave the kid with uncle and catch a flick.. ) and then tuesday is golf day.. they leave at 8 and they come home around 10 pm.. that's all day not a couple of hours.. and then wednesday thursday they work.. I'm sure that they'll get off a little early to hang out, so it should be good.. still have to take lj to johnson street.. it's cool too.. the whole place and everything we've done is cool...

oh and ... (drum roll please) Fragle Rock season 1 & 2 (who knows that could be all of them) is on DVD now.. I told jason he has to buy it for Hailey.. how fun.. Make sure I tell Cathy about this.. she'll flip.. she loves that show!!

ok.. gotta run..

really tired and the morning is coming so fast..

ciao for now..
me

Jo's Vac, Day 2

2006-09-13T16:15:00.000-06:00

I guess technically it's day 3... Today I went for a ride along with 'the boys'... it was good.. got to see abit of the area.. then we went to mobey dicks... The best fish and chips since 1975... they were really good... and... they probably have the world's smallest bathrom...

Didn't do much last night... well.. yesterday afternoon or last night... played with Hailey, had her giggling up a storm... then watched a couple movies.. these guys had tuesday golfing.. and thought they were coming home before going for dinner to get me.. but that's breaking tradition,and if' it's not broke, don't fix it.. so they went and had beers and I chilled at the pad...

gonna go to uncle bryon's to the hot tub tonight, and I think LJ and I are going to go to stanley park tomorrow... see some fishes...

well.. can't think of anything to say.. kinda tired, and can't pay attention..

ciao for now,
me

Vacation in White Rock... Day 1

2006-09-12T17:00:00.000-06:00

It is so beautiful here... can see why so many people want to retire here...

hailey and i went to the ocean... it was really nice... and really far down... i mean we had to go down a really huge hill to get there... and what goes down hill must come back up... whoa! tiring... then we did some shopping in some little shops, had lunch at a place right on the water.. it was pretty cool...

I have to finish feeding her, so I'll just put some pics up and then say adios!

me

And I'm in White Rock

2006-09-11T22:24:00.000-06:00

Hello from White Rock.

So I'm sitting here on my uncles couch watching game 2 of 2 of monday night football. How thrilling. I can't complain, I'm definetly out numbered here, 2 to one... and a half... it's cool though.. I'm learning things like leroy means giants and any one with the last name moss is automatically first named Joey... (hockey reference for those of you who aren't edmonton fans)

wow, I'm not big on the capitals today and apprently I like to start sentences with so and wow... *giggles* what can you do..

So it was a long drive... 13 hours to get here... it was a long trip a lot of construction and a few more then normal stops, he could make it in two stops if he wanted because that's all the gas stops he has to make, but we stopped for bathroom breaks, hailey bum change breaks, and food stops.. it was over all a quick 13 hours, left at 7 am this morning.. been up since 5 this morning... and here it's 9:30 which means it 10:30 at home.. so hailey will be going to be earlier, but she'll be up earlier... darn it...

so tomorrow they're golfing... for $100 I won't be joining... might be going for the golf cart ride, but definetly not golfing..

Uncle has a lap top so I'm sitting here playing on it instead...

I got the coolest mikerita margarita glass... it's great... we're gonna have to drink 4 more bottles of this stuff so we can get 4 more glasses... unfortunatley I was not supposed to be drinking any more till halloween.. but that was an unrealistic idea for coming to stay with these two... it's a crazy thought... the guys who soley support Budweiser beer... hahahahahahah..

not sure what other plans there are.. might go see my other uncle and get him to give me some pointers on fly tieing.. and sunday I'm gonna go to seatle and check for some flip flops for jason that have bottle openers in them.. we saw them at the foreman's retreat... jason can't wait... he's funny...

what else do I want to talk about, nothing I want to talk about, I'm tired and I think i'm going to go 'watch a movie' in bed with hailey and catch some z's...

ciao for now darlings...

me!

Gone for a bit

2006-09-07T23:15:00.000-06:00

So, I'm not sure if I will be on here in Vancouver.. probably.. but you never know.. I might be insanley busy... I am when I'm at home.. but uncles appartment is small so I won't have to be cleaning all day long.. and it's not mine.. even helping out shouldn't take that long...

I'm leaving in the morning.. (at an un-godly hour.. 6 am... have to be up at 5 am.. gonna be tired.. that's only 6 hours away!) and we're going to Kananaskis for the weekend with the Hoover Foremen.. it's a fun time.. it was last year.. this year we're white water rafting.. pretty excited about that.. tomorrow I'm fishing all day.. cuz I head up with jason and then I have to kill time from 8-4:30, last year I studied for a insurance test.. this year.. well fishing, mario kart and tetris on my new game boy, cross stitching, and my book. if that can't keep me occupied for 8 hours.. there's no hope... what else??

hm.. oh, I got a flight on Air Canada for cheeper then west jet.. I can't believe it.. I thought that Air Canada was more expensive.. I'm pretty impressed.. I never thought to look there until I missed my 2 week window of opportunity to get home from Abbotsford.. (white rock actually but that's the closest airport, or the easiest anyways) and so I looked and low and behold they were cheeper.. yay them..

so I'm off.. I'll write next week and let you know if I caught any fish, or if I just got attacked by bears (it's that time of year you know.. says my very paranoid dad, I'm not a total retard...) so yeah.. I'll probably send a line from Vancouver!

Ciao for now, anyone who still reads this..

me

why won't the damn pictures work?

2006-09-05T14:28:00.000-06:00

ok... had some techincal difficulties getting these pictures up here... but here they are.. from the weekend..

Us on Danny's almost finished new deck

Mom and Hailey playin'

aww.. so cute...

where we fished...

uncle lawrence snoozing on a rock...